It's Yours Truly - From Ultima Thule

It's Latin, And Yes It Rhymes
Okay, I apologise for using the Zombie Language once again, but you know it can be hard finding the best bon mot for your post - oh and there I go, using French, but you know it can be hard finding the best sine qua non - and there we revert to Latin and the whole thing goes around in a loop -

 - which will have the benefit, one hopes, of diverting Hamster attention away from BOOJUM!
     On with the motley!

A Photo-Essay: Breakfast At The Mansion
I proudly stand by my right, as asserted in Magna Carta, to have ice cream for breakfast.

Home-made strawberry ice cream

     There are sound reasons for starting your day with ice-cream:
     1)  It is delicious
     2)  It gives you a sugar boost at the beginning of the working day
     3)  No cooking required - scoop and scoff, to coin a phrase
     4)  No working parts

Conrad Versus Breakfast
I don't normally have a cooked breakfast - in addition to ice cream I usually guzzle a plateful of crumpets alongside my pot of tea - but this morning there were various bits and pieces in the fridge that needed using up.  Thus:  

Eight sausages, two bacon rashers, two slices of toast, five scrambled eggs and a pile of baked beans.

     I should probably have used a larger plate, this one is a bit crowded and makes it look as if - well, no, actually I am eating a lot. I wondered if I'd overdone it -

Halfway through

     - but here we are at mid-point and hardly slowing down.  Oh, whilst I was eating this a curious thing happened, Edna suddenly became my new best friend -

The very definition of "hangdog"

    And here is proof that I finished everything off:

Conrad: 1  Breakfast: 0

Bus Wait Rate has proven to be a real thing - not being in any special hurry to get into Manchester, why!  Zero buses pass on the other side of the road.

"Soldier From The Wars Returning"
Well now.  Mr Carrington* mentions at one point a book entitled "Spoon River Anthology", remarking that it was widely read in his day but had become utterly forgotten by the time he published his book.  Of course, you, the reader, know what a fearful pedant Conrad is and will have guessed that I noted the title and looked it up.
     It's a book of free-form poetry abou
                                                          z
                                                           z
                                                            z
                                                             z

     Whoops!  Sorry about that.  Poetry.  Hate it, hate it with a passion.  Moving on -
     Charles* also mentioned the "Pemberton Billings scandal".  Old PB was a jolly clever inventor, but a fearful homophobe and really really right wing in his ways**.  He got involved in a libel trial after alleging that there were "47,000 perverts at the mercy of German blackmail", and he won (shades, one feels, of that similar list that Joseph McCarthy used to wave around with gay abandon with abandon).  You had to be discreet in those days and the trial was couched in terms of "The Sins of Sodom and Lesbia", and all that.

Instead of an NSFW picure, here's a cutaway of Vostok 1

     Conrad, being an amiable and broadminded chap, rather snickers up his sleeve at PB; for all his ranting and tanting, the Irish in voting appear to have given his historical inheritance a rude gesture.  At which point we are approaching modern politics, thus - fin.

Twitter.  Especially The "Twit" Bit

Gasp!  It's already 9 minutes past 6 o'clock - I'm late for beer!  Back in a minute -

Normality has been resumed.  Take a look at this:

"BMW reported a strong Q1 mainly boosted by stable demand from Europe and US.  Time to trade?"

     Where did these drivelling snivelling grizzling numpties get the idea that Conrad is interested in playing the stock market, and especially the stock market as it concerns cars?
This is equally as fatuous as Facebook's asinine "Suggested Posts"

"Whelmed"
I wonder.  You read consistently about people being "Overwhelmed", as in when you eat a double-chocolate cheesecake with chocolate sprinkles and chocolate sauce that has a base made out of chocolate biscuits, eaten with a drink of hot chocolate, whilst listening to Hot Chocolate***.  Or, here's a better one, when a group of valiant survivors are overwhelmed by the zombie horde.

Zombies overwhelming.  With gay abandon, apparently.

     You also read about "Underwhelmed".  As in "The Rolling Stones were underwhelmed when only three people turned up to attend at the stadium"^.
     Why, then, do we never read of people being "Whelmed"?  as in nothing out of the ordinary?
     "How was your day at the office, dear?'
     "Oh, just whelming."
     OR:
     "Kill any HYDRA agents today, Director Fury?"
     "Not many, Coulson.  Kinda whelmed as a day."


Well I would hang around as there is lots more I could write, but the 60 minutes has been and gone and we're up to <pauses to check> 873 words.


* The author, not merely a name I pulled out of a hat
** Yes, politics, but from 97 years ago so that's alright.
*** Maybe this is overkill not overwhelm, but you get my point, right?
^ I hate the Rolling Stones.  And they're probably also zombies, too.