I Say Cupid - Is That A Seleucid?

No!  It's Not A Species Of Wasp
"Seleucid" refers to one of the inheriting dynasties that took over part of the empire of Alexander, after he died.
     I realise this is mixing Roman mythology (Cupid) and Greek history, making rather a heady brew, but it does rhyme, after all, which goes a long way to making things right.

Seleucid's looking pretty rock

The Vole Clock
Excuse me for sounding frankly incredulous about this, as I'd never heard of it last year whilst entertaining you with the Skreeming Voles and all things vole-related.  Apparently its a methodology for dating archaeological sites by using the teeth of voles as a metric and reference - and here is the link for ye who question:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vole_clock

     Go on, look it up, knock yourself out.
     It's not April the First, still, is it?

A Vile Clock.  Close enough

"Humans"
As seen on a bus poster, that most fruitful of all inspirations for BOOJUM!  A "drama" on Channel 4.
     How much vaguer and useless could a title be?
     Come on - there are what, 7 billion Hom. Sap.* across the globe, with a recorded history going back ten thousand years.     Could you possibly narrow the field a little?
     If it had said "Solar system" or "Galaxy" or "Universe", that would imply a bit of science fiction.  As it is, Conrad shall imagine that it details how you lot might get rid of yourselves before my invasion fleet gets here, which will go down very badly with the big wheels back on the homeworld.

Oh, I forgot - there's been a few up here, too.

"History of the 38th Welsh Division"
This arrived yesterday, and might be euphemistically described as "slim".  Here is proof:

Visual validation

     It comes in at 85 pages, a fifth of the length of my Fifty First Division history.  Not quite "Arrived in France. Sang. Played rugby. Fought Germans. Won" but not far off, Conrad feels.  I shall shortly be regaling you with - oh, look at this, no index!  Hmmm.  I might have a bash at this once I've finished the 51st volume.  I'll let you know.

Ah, Coincidence, Fancy You Hiding In The Coal Bunker
If you have been faithfully reading the blog, especially yesterday, then you will have encountered the mystery substance "Sprong", which Conrad has invented to pre-empt the silly suggestions from Facebook and Twitter about what he might like to peruse (more of this later).

To refresh your memory

     Today there was an edition of The Metro on the bus, so I took it along to work and indulged in a double espresso before starting work, making a few outline notes for BOOJUM! whilst I imbibed the caffeine hit.
     What's this!  I gasped.  

Visually validated

     Clearly this celebrity - sorry no idea who she is and not inclined to find out - is wearing a coat made of Sprong!
      One just hopes none of her friends or fellow pedestrians are carrying their precious vole collections around with them ...

Facebook, If You Were Bread, You'd Be Dog Buns!
I did mention that Facebook and Twitter have a trend for suggesting ridiculous sites.  This latest one is - let me show you instead:

"iCracked  Start your own business! ...  in mobile phone repair"

     What?  Dear audience, Conrad is not known for dexterity.  He is, in fact, a great gallumphing oaf with hands the size of shovels and fingers with all the dexterity of jumbo sausages -

For scale purposes

     - great for punching people or wielding a pick-axe, but not anything smaller than a nine-pound sledgehammer.
     Mobile phone repair!  That's quite beside the fact that Conrad hates mobile phones and would gladly see all of them dumped in the Challenger Deep, right alongside those Transformers you see in those documentary films.

Here's Something You Don't See Very Often -
If you are unfamiliar with the world of publishing, gentle reader, then you may not know that writing a manuscript is the easy part of things.  Getting published is very difficult unless you have an agent.  Fine.  Except it's very difficult to get an agent unless you've been published.  Catch 22, which itself probably went around the publishers of America before getting published.
     Anyway, there I am on the bus, reading "Stemming the Tide".  No!  Nothing to do with flood control in the Fenlands - about the British Expeditionary Force and how it was commanded in the months of mobile warfare in 1914.
     Art Department, earn your pay:

Front Cover  External

     And what do we have here on the inside front cover?  No!  Not a signature!

The last sentence, for the light in intellect

     Wow - this is really exceptional.  However!  Don't go trying to sell them an MSS about anything except military history.  And the contributors to this volume all have at least a degree in history, focussing on military studies and the First Unpleasantness.

That's all for tonight.  Tune in tomorrow on the same Bat-channel ...


* And at least one alien spy wearing human camouflage