Tomorrow's Blog Is Done -

Now For Today's

By the time I've finished this, it will have rolled around to Feeding Time for Edna, which she seems to think starts at about 14:30.  I was warned that her stomach time zone is several hours ahead of cold hard reality.  Art!

     Dozing on my dirty laundry.  STOP WHINGING EDNA!  You are interrupting my creative process as I craft words and pictures.  Then I have to work out next week's schedule, hoping it's neither Silly or Stupid.

     ANYWAY on with the links.

2025

BOOJUM!: When Mom And Dad Were Very, Very Bad

2024

BOOJUM!: Were I To Say "Commando"

2023

BOOJUM!: Scaling Up

2022

BOOJUM!: CAUTION! S.F.W.

2021

BOOJUM!: The Bomb From Atom

2020

BOOJUM!: Your Tiger Feet

2019

BOOJUM!: Back With A Muted Pop

2018

BOOJUM!: The Flowers Of EEEEvil

2017

BOOJUM!: You're Going To Hate Me For This -

2016

BOOJUM!: Slovak-Ian

2015

BOOJUM!: John Shuttleworth: Celebrating Mediocrity!

2014

BOOJUM!: March Comes In Like A Lion -

If I Were To Say 'Rome'

You Might Well Think This Was A Progress Report

 - about the James Holland work 'Cassino 44', about the epic battle fought there in order to be able to capture The Eternal City, and if I prod Art into semi-sentience -

     But No! we are not focussing on this work, although as is typical for one of ol' Jim's books, there's a lot of maps at the forefront as well as aerial panoramas. Wh

     ANYWAY whilst I may be pronouncing it 'Rome', it's actually spelled 'Roam', which my 'Collins Concise English Dictionary' defines as: "To travel or walk about with no fixed purpose or direction".  Today's Intro concerns 'Roam' as the term used of mobile phones, the Devil's Digital Devices in Conrad's opinion.  Art!

Satan using WhatsApp

     A mobile phone user will accrue roaming charges when using a cellular network that is not their home one, and they can accumulate pretty steep charges very quickly, especially if they are unaware that they're actually roaming.

     So, our Intro today comes from 'Karma Stories', a Youtube channel run by Rob The Canadian, and the story posted by 'Frigofla', another  Canuckistanian, who worked decades ago at a call centre for a South Canadian ('American' if we're being formal) cellular company.  Roaming charges were always a business nightmare for the call centre staff, and Frigofla gives an example of roaming charges along the Gulf Coast.  Art!

     You might pick up a tower on Roaming, and be paying $3.25 per minute, so a 30-minute call could rack up $100 in charges, which people would be very unappy about.  The call centre staff would give a credit the first time this happened to people complaining, and warn/caution/educate them about checking the 'Roaming' notification on their phone display.  Art!

Or just do without the horrid things

     Normally that was it, if it happened a second time then the user paid the bill in full, except - seemingly because they were based in British America ('Canada' if we're being formal) and thus the embodiment of Nice - if the bill came in at under $25, meaning that the user was trying to avoid large roaming charges, they would also give them a credit for that.  Awww!  Art?

     The video clip, from which this is a still,  shows Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney making introductory statements in Japanese, utterly wowing the Japanese President and the audience, too.  

     ANYWAY AGAIN Frigofla said their favourite call centre madness featuring roaming charges came when they had to deal with Bitchy Entitled Abuser, hereafter BEA.  She was calling to challenge her roaming charges because she had a cell phone plan that covered the whole of the United States - using the formal definition here as otherwise things would get confusing.  You'll see.

     Frigofla, as any call centre operator would do, checked BEA's bill and yes, she was fully covered for the whole US.  However, the three Canadian provinces she had been to were not covered.  This is where things got surreal.  Art!

     Frigofla explained this, whereupon BEA informed them that Canada was one of the 50 US states.  No, they were not joking, they were in deadly earnest.  Frigofla, countering this by stating that they were IN Canada, was called 'stupid' and told to get a supervisor.  The call was escalated to the supervisor, then the senior supervisor, then the project director and finally to the site director, none of whom could convince BEA that Canada was not an US state.

     Possibly because she had racked up over $900 in roaming fees?  That they were not going to get a credit for.  Art!

     She then screamed she was going to end the service.  Frigofla, possibly enjoying a bit of schadenfreude, informed BEA that she was still liable for the $900 and an early termination fee of $200 for each line she had.  She had five.  So that's another $1,000 to pay, which provoked so much swearing and screaming from BEA that another supervisor, listening in to the call in sheer disbelief, came over and disconnected her.  The site director had her lines immediately cancelled, both as per her request and the verbal abuse.

     Surprise!  BEA refused to pay the outstanding total, which then accumulated fines and was sent to a collections agency, the sum now reaching $3,500.  Or four times her original charge that she could have paid, instead of being a screeching bottomhole.  Art!

     

'a screeching bottomhole'

     BEA tried ringing the call centre several times, only for them to refuse to speak to her and tell her she needed to speak to the collections agency.  Frigofla took one of her calls and had trouble speaking properly thanks to sporting an enormous malicious grin.

     The story as narrated ends there.  I can add that the collections agency would likely take BEA to small claims court, and if awarded judgement, garnish her wages, put a lien on her house and car whilst freezing her bank account.  One way or another, they are getting that $3,500.  What you might call Roaming In The Glomming.

Once Again My News Feed Comes Through!

In generating content that I used to get from the bizarre items Temu threw up on 'The Daily Beast's website.  Now we have the MSN-generated mystery tat.  Art!

     To judge from context, I think the 'Corvette' they are talking about is the car, not the small naval warship, as the small naval warship would have a class name to identify itself.  Conrad is unsure quite what a 'Differential side yoke cap' is and why you'd need any kit for it, let alone a heavy duty one.  Art!

     A Corvette differential side yoke.  It all becomes clear.

     Actually no it doesn't, I was lying.  Still no idea.

'Falling Skies' Season One

Conrad saw this, but so long ago that I only recall a few scenes.  I also note that the Professor limits his deep knowledge of military history and how it applies to the resistance of Hom. Sap. to alien invaders for a single speech so far.  Art!

     It came out in 2011 and ran for five seasons, so they did something right.

     Today, it looks out of date in that nobody is using drones, which is me being a bit snarky.  I also wonder how long ago this alien invasion occurred, as the resistance are using cars and motorbikes and petrol has a limited shelf life.

Here's More Not-So-Gentle Shoeing

Back to the Canuskistanians again.  It seems that Pierre Poilievre, the leader of their Conservative Party, has proposed a coalition of English-speaking countries, i.e. Canada, Australia, New Zealand and the UK, as a new league to deal with the Trump and post-Trump world.  Notably omitted is South Canada, as this country under King Piggy is the one causing all the problems.  The news page also had a new, unflattering picture of Fat Caligula.  Art!

     Don't forget, a la John Bolton, this is Trump at his best after half an hour being made up, and another 90 minutes concealing his bald spot.  He looks about ten minutes away from just keeling over, hence leaning on the doorframe.  If you're such an alpha male, Don, do a 50-yard sprint.  Or even 25.  J D Vance thinks that's a really really good idea.

Finally -

Ending with another Biercism.

"Daring, n: One of the most conspicuous qualities of a man in security."

Did You Know?

In Both The Novel And Film Of "The Big Sleep"

 - which is an euphemism for death - the Sternwood's chauffeur is murdered by person or persons unknown, and it's never solved in either medium.  Art!

     Even Chandler himself didn't know.  It kick-starts the film off with the car and driver being recovered from the end of a pier, beginning as it means to go on.

     Well, I have another mystery centred around a car for you, one featuring a quite swingeing revenge by the hubbo in a pending divorce case.  One thing missing from the whole tortuous tale is what kind of car it was, which does not remotely bother Your Humble Scribe, as to him car is a metal box with a wheel at each corner.  Never mind brake horsepower, does it have a CD player?  Art!

The important bit

     To begin with, Spiteful Petty Ex Wife, hereafter SPEW - actually not divorced just yet, but definitely separated - had possession of the car and keys, both of which had been paid for by Scrupulously Legal Exacting Writer, hereafter SLEW.  They were living apart at this point, he on his own and she with her bottomhole boyfriend, SPEW's Loud Abusive Boyfriend, hereafter SLAB.  We are not told how or why she got the car if SLEW paid for it, so we'll just accept this as a fait accompli.  She wanted to be able to keep the car, so she filed for a Restraining Order against SLEW, meaning he couldn't legally go within 500 yards of her, thus putting the car out of reach.  Violation of an RO means that the cops are called immediately and will turn up in a hurry, anticipating a Domestic Violence case.  Art!

     SLEW stated later in this Youtube saga from 'Dark Fluff' that he was a veteran, probably a senior NCO as he was verrrrry organised, practical and efficient.  He immediately lodged an appeal, then collected his company's, his own and the Department of Transport GPS logs about the car's location, also writing a 3-page testimony about the background.  Then he contacted the dealership the car came from and got a second key ordered and delivered.  Getting his ducks in line.

     

     The appeal date comes up on a Friday, SLEW drives two states away to the court - presumably in a hire-car - and arrives there 4 hours early, with the mass of documentation to hand, which is a bit of a waste as SPEW is a no-show.  The judge finds in his favour.

     'Can I retrieve my car?' asks SLEW.  The judge studiously avoids saying yes or no, as that would be considered legal advice that they are not allowed to deliver, BUT does instruct a clerk of the court to deliver a signed 'Order Of Dismissal' for the RO.  A 'yes' without saying 'yes'.  Art!

     SLEW takes an Uber to SLAB's house, where indeed the car in question is parked up and with his new second key, gets in and drives off in it, RO no longer applying.  Within 30 minutes SLAB is on the phone ranting and raving, including making a death threat, all of which is recorded and used by SLEW to open a court case on Monday for a Temporary Restraining Order.  The judge overseeing the TRO is the same judge dealing with their divorce case, which seems a bit Conflict-of-Interest to Conrad but then I am not a lawyer.  The TRO is granted, protecting SLEW, his property and, crucially, his not-yet-ex wife, whom he had legally put down as his spouse on the TRO application.

     Why so protective?  O I didn't think you'd ask!

     Because SPEW was living with SLAB in his parent's basement, she had to move out as SLAB was forbidden to be within 300 yards of her.  So she was now homeless.

     It seems SLAB, a grown man living in his parent's basement, didn't have a car of his own, nor the funds to buy one, so SPEW lacked transport, meaning she lost her new job as she couldn't get there on time.  So she was now jobless.  Not only that, her college was too far distant for her to be able to use public transport to get there, so she failed her course but still had the outstanding loans to pay.  So now she was penniless.  To top it all off, she was also 4 months pregnant by SLAB.

     SLEW finished this narrative there, so we don't know the ultimate fate of his ex and her boyfriend, but I am willing to bet folding money that their relationship also folded.  

     There are also the divorce proceedings, which I will detail separately or this entire blog would be about SPEW.  I bet you can hardly wait.

In Topsy-Turvy Land

A.k.a. Mordorvia, it seems that once again the serfs have to pay for the Tsar's war, with anyone who posted an advert on Telegram since September 2025 now being liable for fines in rules imposed in February 2026.  Yes, retrospective fines are a thing in Ruffia, especially if it makes people abandon Telegram, which is the aim here.  Art!

     Barad-Dur tested it's internet kill-switch yesteryon, shutting down the whole internet across Mordorvia, as Putinpot gets increasingly paranoid about people plotting or protesting and using the internet to do so.  Not even mobile phone voice calls were getting through.

     As I have said only half-jokingly, welcome to North Korea 2.0!  This is why the sales of anti-depressants in Ruffia has skyrocketed over the past 4 years, to x3 times what they used to be.  By the end of this year everything in Ruffia will be banned, illegal or prohibited.

Goodbye 'Stranger Things'

I finished the extra-specially long 8th episode of Season Five, and whilst there were problems with this season, I think they wrapped it up as well as could be expected or hoped for.  Art!

     As the younger team members graduate High School, they would inevitably separate and go their different ways, onto college and university, and the older members, seen above, would also be moving into adult life and employment, meaning everyone moving on.  

     One of the problems I mentioned is the sheer size of the cast, with everyone from Season One onwards having to be given a role, because the Duffer Brothers are softies about things like that, 'twould seem.

SPOILERS ALERT!

SERIOUSLY, AHEAD BE SPOILERS!

I WARNED 'EE

     Nice to see Captain Scab get a final come-uppance from an angry mom wielding an axe.  Art!

     What you might call a decapitation strike.  No telekinesis or guns or flamethrowers, just an edged weapon and a strong arm.

     As for Elle?  Who knows.  The DBs deliberately left the ending ambiguous, with a scene of her ascending crags in Iceland.  She may be alive or dead, in a Schröedinger state until -

     Hmmmm.  Conrad, the cynical realist, wonders how long before a Nineties-dated spin-off arrives on Netflix?

     I did wonder what happened to Linda Hamilton's character; after the Upside Down is blown to smithereens, she is never seen again.  Nancy and Hopper, who slaughter at least a dozen soldiers, are never called to account for their acts.  In fact Hoppy is back as Police Chief of Hawkins, after being a Wild Man Of The Woods for this season.  Don't tell me - It's In The Script.

     OKAY YOU CAN COME OUT NOW, SPOILERS DONE WITH 

     Conrad now seriously considering going back to 'Falling Skies'.  Art!

Mike Johnson's Ulcer Thanks You

Mike 'Moscow' Johnson, loyal bootlicker and lickspittle for Donnie Dorko, is the Speaker of the House over in South Canada, meaning he has an awful lot of power.  

     He also has an awful lot of responsibility, having to try and corral and coerce his Republican members to vote as DJ Tango wants, whether that's a good idea or another product of Truth Social at 02:37 in the morning.  The Republican majority in the House has been successively shrinking as members decide they don't want to be involved in politics any longer and would rather unclog toilets by hand as an occupation.  Thus, any Republican Wizard Lizard Gizzard who decides to 'cross the floor' and vote with the Ice Cream Bandits has an incredibly disproportionate effect.  Art!

     Mister Issa has decided it's too difficult to campaign in his newly-redrawn Californian district, and that the Toilet Unclogging By Hand industry looks a much better bet.  Hence Mike's need for a gallon of Pepto-Bismol on a daily basis.

     I put this in here as 'Clownish Entertainment' as it cannot, by any meaningful metric, be called 'Politics'.

A Fox Guarding The Chicken Coop

I Take It You're Familiar With The Idiom

I checked my 'Brewer's' and it's not present under 'Fox', 'Chicken' or 'Coop', so I shall explicate for anyone unfamiliar with either foxes or chickens.  Firstly, chickens roost in a coop at night.  Secondly, foxes dearly like to eat chickens.  Only an idiot would put a fox in charge of defending a chicken coop full of defenceless chickens, wouldn't they?  Art!

Two mighty intellects at work

     Okay, now that pictorial insult is out of the way, we can move on to another case of 'Destroying It From The Inside' although Conrad isn't sure we'll have enough material to do a properly lengthy Intro.  

     So, let us begin with the company 'Proofpoint', who are a South Canadian cybersecurity company providing software and services to that end.  Art!

    Let us also introduce 'Abnormal AI Security', whom are another specialist  cybersecurity firm, focussing on AI applications in communications such as e-mails.  Art!

     These businesses are not friendly rivals, they are uncooperative competitors looking to displace each other in the marketplace.  Just to set the scene.

     Then let us introduce Proofpoint's Channel Sales Director, Samuel Boone.  Art!

     Sam had been with Proofpoint since 2013, rising to the position of Director, Channel Sales, a senior management position where he would manage sales strategies, deal with partner organisations and aim to hit revenue goals.

     Then, in April of 2021, Sam accepted a senior position at Abnormal.  You would expect the offboarding process of a staff member at his level to be - well, at least 'competent', if not 'rigourously vetted and audited'.  Except not.  You see, before he left, Sam used a USB to download what is termed in the industry as a 'Battlecard' from Proofpoint files.  Art!

     No, Art.  A Battlecard in business terms is a single-page 'sales enablement' document that compiles data to help sales advisers - such as Sam - to beat competitors - such as Abnormal.  Art!

     They typically include competitor weaknesses, price comparisons, judging products and a cheat-sheet of reasons (or excuses) to contradict objections.  It's a fair bet that Sam already knew a lot of this information already, so it may have been taken as a means of ingratiating himself with Abnormal.

     Whichever reason it was, Proofpoint did not cover themselves with glory, especially given that they were an organisation concerned with - you know, DATA PROTECTION.  It took them four months to discover Sam's theft of data, at which point they sued as of July 2021.  Their suit stated:  "In its filing, Proofpoint claims that “Boone threatens to inflict incalculable long-term competitive harm” on its company"  They were also looking to enforce a non-competition clause in Boone's contract - which may not have been either legal or enforceable as a lot of NDAs have no standing in law.
     Bear in mind that this is nearly five years ago.  Admittedly it was during Covid-19, which will have affected judicial progress, but there is no outcome or sentencing I can find online.  All teh Interwebz can provide is the original date of the suit and what it was about, and that it was filed in the 'Texas Western District Court'.  Art!

     Conrad notes that Proofpoint have previously filed lawsuits against alleged theft of intellectual property, as against 'Vade Security' in late 2021, which came to trial only two years later - not five.  So where is the outcome for Proofpoint versus Boone?  Did they settle out of court?

     We now come to PACER, the acronym for 'Public Access to Court Electronic Records', Art!

     You may be wondering why two firms based in California are having a case heard in Texas, as did I.  It's because the WTDC specialises in things like breach of copyright or patent - Art!

     
     It is possible to join PACER, even if you are a foreign national, and potentially have to pay a fee of $0.10 per page of searched documents you find, up to a cap of $3.00.  So - Conrad registered.  Art!

     The kicker is that search enablement has to wait until a letter is sent to the applicant by US Mail, estimated at taking between 5 - 7 days, which contains a numerical 'token' to be able to carry out searches.  Conrad is unsure how this works with the Atlantic Ocean sitting between South Canada and This Sceptred Isle.  I shall let you know how this proceeds, and am betting you can hardly wait.

     Well well well, that came to 738 words, quite adequate for an Intro - go me!

What's Going On With Ruffian Shipping?

Primary problem for the orcs shadow fleet tankers is that they keep getting confiscated by EU member states or South Canada, or Ukraine keeps hitting them with naval drones.  Harkean ye to the 'Metagaz', a Ruffian Liquefied Natural Gas tanker.  Art!

Very much 'Before'

'During' and 'After'

     It was pretty obviously hit by something surface-based like a 'Sea Baby', which knocked a huge hole in the side, and the ship has now sunk.  I mention this ship's destruction because LNG tankers are rare in Ruffian service and extremely expensive - $200 million for this one.  Whoever was buying this LNG may now want a refund.  Oooops.

Specious Drivel!

Conrad thinks it must be a slow news week, except for that war with Iran stuff and the on-going war in Ukraine, and Cuba about to collapse, or obscure minor events like that.  Art!

     Nostradamus didn't 'predict' anything.  What he did was write out quatrains in obscure language that carefully avoided predicting anything in advance, and which his fans then seize upon after the fact to claim that 'what he meant was -' followed by special pleading.  Quite how Iran, whose air force and navy have been destroyed, could wage global thermonuclear war without - you may be ahead of me here - any thermonuclear weapons remains to be seen.

I Can See The Comments Now

Art!

     Shortly to come from Nigel Farrago, The Nasty Little Man: "They cheated by getting more people to vote for them, which is an illegal war crime and I still want to have Donald Trump's baby.'

Another 500-Page Opus

Now that my work by Pritt Buttar is out of the way, I've started 'The Eastern Front' by Nick Lloyd, which concerns the First Unpleasantness rather than the Second, and is a bit novel.  Somewhere in the Book Mountain are three of Pritt's works on the same front.  Art!

     I don't think you can make out the title here - "The Greater Eastern Front", where Nick has kind of cheated by including the Balkans as a Front.  Thus he is able to include Serbia and Salonika (in Greece) as part of his work.  I am only 20 pages in but will let you know how it goes.  Yes yes yes, I bet you can hardly wait.

For Those Being Patient

I remembered to take my digital camera along on a recent walk with Edna - who is lying whimpering on the floor at how unjust the world is at not taking her for more walks and rendering more food - and now have proof that we're doing the two-walks per day schedule.  Art!

     Yes, proof that she has to sniff EVERY PATCH OF GRASS en route.

     Since we are now at count I can take her trotties.

"Endurance Is Not A Success"

I Know What You're Thinking

If your expeditionary sailing ship is trapped in pack ice in the Antarctic, suffers a hull rupture so serious that it has to be abandoned and later sinks, then you can say that's not a success.  Art!

Ice = 1 Ship = 0

     Behold the 'Endurance', said ship and the wooden steed of Sir Ernest Shackleton for his 1914 - 1915 exploratory venture to Antarctica.  No, it isn't supposed to look like that; this is what happens when the pack ice closes in on the hull, prefatory to crushing it.  You may be relieved to know that the expedition members survived, which is a tale in itself.

     ANYWAY Perfidious Albion's Senior Service decided they liked the name 'Endurance' and named an icebreaker 'HMS Endurance' in 1967.  Art!

      ALMIGHTY SNIVELLING GARGANTUAN DOG BUNS!

     Sorry.  Currently listening to my i-pod and the Snow Patrol track 'The Symphony' is playing, from the album 'Fallen Empires' and it's fifteen years old.

     BACK TO ENDURANCE, HMS, PENNANT NUMBER A171.  She left service in 1991, meaning that yes, she was inducted into the Falklands Task Force, acting as a patrol and helicopter platform, landing Royal Marine parties and helping disable the Argentine submarine. 'Santa Fe'.

     So, pretty successful, I'm sure you'd agree.  So, where does today's title come from?  O I thought you'd never ask!

     From the last part of Pyotr Kurzin's detailed look back at the four-year involvement of Mordorvia in his 'Global Gambit' vlog.  Art!

Marque and maker

     Bear in mind that Pyotr isn't some knee-jerk anti-Ruffian, he has sources and contacts behind the Tin Curtain, and within the Ruffian expatriate community.

     This is where Putinpot's calculus about how much suffering his serfs can take comes into play, because Ol' Pyot acidly observes 'Endurance is not success'; rather it is the opposite, persistence disguising failure and hoping a miracle arrives.  For 2026, the feeling for Ruffians is that of cumulative strain over time, where the probability of a storming battlefield victory has diminished to near-zero.  All they have to look forward to are more privations as Mordorvia transitions into North Korea 2.0  Art!

     This is the orcs last significant victory, and a Pyrrhic one at that: the ruins of Avdiivka, a sea of rubble that cost 40,000 orcs to take - in February 2024.  This advanced their front lines without any deeper advantage gained.  They still haven't taken Pokrovsk, either, a minor Donbas town of no great strategic significance.  But Peter The Average has been told it was already captured, so an ocean of blood is going to be spilled trying to turn fiction into fact.  Once again, endurance is not success.  See also Kupiansk.

     Nobody foresaw this four years ago when the Special Idiotic Operation began.  Kyiv was supposed to be swiftly defeated and renamed Kiev, leading to the downfall of all Ukraine, medals all round, Putinpot crowned Eternal Tsar, etcetera.

     Except not.  Art!

     Remember when the 'Moskva' was sunk?  I do, because the BBC had drawn up a list of possible 'provocations' that Ukraine might commit, causing Putinpot to resort to tactical nuclear weapons, and sinking the Moskva was one of them.  In fact he dared not, as Xi had sternly warned him that any such action would result in a hostile China, meaning the end of the Ruffian war effort in a couple of weeks.  Art!

     This is 'Operation Spiderweb', with Ruffians proving that tyres placed on strategic bombers do not protect against FPV drone attacks.  One-third of Mordorvia's long-range bomber force went up in smoke.  Art!

     The naval port of Sevastopol, one of the reasons the orcs invaded Crimea in 2014, the crown jewel of Ruffian occupation -

     Which they have now abandoned.  It is much too vulnerable to Ukrainian drone and missile strikes, so they have taken to hiding what's left of the Black Sea Fleet in the Sea of Azov or Novorossiysk.  The latter of which is proving to be just as vulnerable to drone attacks as Sevastopol: the Ukrainians hit the port, facilities, ships and oil infrastructure yesteryon with TWO HUNDRED drones.  They hit Engels air base with at least 70 drones at the same time.  Art!

Novorossiysk stages live re-enactment of Deep Purple album 'Burn'

     Here, as Pyotr puts it, is an example in action of a small country or power adapting much quicker than a larger one, where technology is activated to neutralise mass and expedite manpower.  Art!

The killer lawnmower is here to stay

     A further example would be the Ukrainians use of decentralized 3D-printing technology to mass-produce drone components, meaning they can now use up to eight thousand FPV drones daily.  Actually that was the figure for 2025, they may be aiming at 12,000 per diem for 2026.  In terms of innovation and adaptability, they are running circles around the much larger but much clumsier and far less efficient Mordorvia.  Art!

Soon to come - AI*

     There has been a new twist on what you might call an 'Innovation Cycle' paradigm in recent days, thanks to the war waged by South Canada and Israel on Iran.  The Iranians, who seem to have the military mentality of a headless chicken - endless decapitation strikes will do this - are launching dozens of their Shahed drones at any country they don't like, whom are now trying to intercept $50,000 drones with $4 million Patriot missiles.  After watching the war in Ukraine for 4 years the Saggy Senile Sepia Sackbut is forced to admit they cannot intercept all these drones.  One imagines a South Canadian anti-drone interceptor system would take 5 years to reach the production stage, after costing $25 billion and only be able to produce 10 interceptors per month, unit cost $500,000.

     Or - they could outsource it to Ukraine.  What was that about cards?

Unit cost $4,000, or 1,000 instead of a single Patriot

Note that nobody's asking the Ruffians about advice or help.  Their given tactic is to intercept drones with oil refineries.

Yay, Volunteer Firefighter Fundraising!

In many rural communities, located a long way from nearby towns and cities, there exists a volunteer firefighting team who will go into action within minutes of an emergency being declared, rather than citizens having to wait thirty minutes or an hour for the full-time chaps to arrive.  Art!

     These chaps and chapesses deserve all the plaudits they can be given, putting their lives on the line voluntarily, and communities repay the favour by raising funds for them, as with this tale, where a beauty pageant for young girls was underway, categories of 1-4 and 5 or 6.  The elder kids had already done their catwalk as 300 mothers, grandmothers and any fathers or brothers unable find a good enough excuse were in attendance inside a marquee.  Art!

     What can possibly go wrong, you ask?  

     Read on and you'll see.

     A 3-year old was supposed to cross the stage from left to right, then walk back again, except she stopped at the centrally-placed flower arrangement to sniff at them, which unscripted act evoked a lot of  'Awwww!' from most of the onlookers.

     Not all.  One grandmother, rather too invested in her own child's performance, yelled at the 3-year old for trying to hog the limelight and attention and they ought to get off the stage.  She then stormed onto the stage, grabbed the child and tried to drag her away.

     This is generally an unwise move to execute in front of a child's mother.  Mom also stormed the stage, dragged Grandkaren back by the hair and pulled her around, face-to-face.  GK, totally amazed that anyone would dare intercept her and interrupt her child abuse, lets go.  

     Mom hauls back and delivers two right hooks to GK's face.  Art!

     The firefighters intervened to break it up.  Grandkaren insists on calling the cops because she's been assaulted and her pride is hurt.  Probably her jaw, too.  When the officers arrive she insists on pressing charges, despite repeatedly being warned by said officers tone and demeanour that this is a big mistake.  She screeches confirmation.

     What could possibly go wrong, you ask?

     She's arrested and charged with child kidnap is what.

     GK, now realising that a sewer's worth of ordure has hit the fan, tries to backtrack, to no avail; she had her chance to de-escalate and refused it.

     What could possibly go wrong, you ask?

     GK stays true to her ways and attacks the cop, and is then Tazered.  Art!

     She got charged in court, put on 2 years probation and given 1,000 hours community service.

     Mom The Masher got all charges dropped as she was acting in self defence and was baked a cake by her appreciative neighbours.

Get Thee Behind Me, Clickbait!

Art!

      'Falling Skies' again, hmmmm?  Conrad feels the universe is trying to tell him something.  Try using Twitter instead, who don't you?

      Thank heavens for my armoured underwear that balks the teeth and talons of the Coincidence Hydra.

How Will You Tell?

Art!

     Crazy enough to put boots on the ground, mayhap?

     And on that wonderful note I leave you.  Chin chin!

*  DO YOU WANT SKYNET?  BECAUSE THIS IS HOW YOU GET SKYNET!1]]]