Don't Be Dismal - It's Pepto-Bismol!

Life Reflecting Art

For ages I have muttered the above as an imprecation, not particularly interested in what "Pepto-Bismol" was, except that it rhymed.  And then today Sophie* posted - well, you will see a bit further down what comes from what she posted.

     So, Pepto-Bismol is a real thing.

     Next - Sprong is revealed to not only be real, but used in airframe maintenance -

Spronging it

A Pome For Alison

Alison, who is one-third of The Kites**, had a birthday event at work on Friday, as she wouldn't be present at work on her actual birthday.  Thanks to Manisha's prodding, Conrad (normally a dozy git at the best of times) had remembered to write her a bit of nonsense doggerel, which she was kind enough to want a copy of.

     Here's your copy:  

A POME FOR ALISON*

Normally it’s Alison who speaks up in verse,

On behalf of the Kites of San Quentin.

Today, obviously, that’s all in reverse;

She gets to hear someone else venting.

Her Facebook page is set to “Confound”

In the persona of mystery Joan Mitchell.

Partner of promoter and player renowned –

Phil “Blood Boy” Mitchell from Minshull.

Alison – or Joan, it does get confused –

Is invariably sunny-natured at work

Get it straight, she is not drug-abused!

Just bright, breezy and prone to twerk.

This attitude, I fear, depresses the glums,

The greys and the gloomy and boring.

To them I say stop flapping your gums

Treasure Jaunty Joan, don’t be so abhorring.

Musically our Alison should be called “Alisonic”

Thanks to her mastery of musical composition,

And gew-gaws and gadgets and all things electronic.

She also indulges in contorted muscled precision

Better known as “Yoga” to you and me.

This allows her to use posture with decision

And play that so sensitive instrument – her Theremini.

*Or is it Joan?

     And there you have it!  The only bit not true is Phil coming from Minshull - however it rhymes.

A Facebook Quiz - "Which Classic Novel Best Describes Your Personality?"

Well, I did think this might have a slightly more positive outcome.  You know what these clickbait quizzes are like; Conrad usually ends up as either "Slug", "Weasel" or "Serial Killer". Behold:

1984.  Thank you.  Thank you so much.

     I don't know about you, but I've read "1984"***, and I think this quiz has me bang to rights, guvnah.

Bismuth

I know that BOOJUM! covered a selection of the elements quite a while back, so it's possible that we've already been entertained by Bismuth, although I doubt it - compared to the wild party-animal elements like Phosphorus, or Flourine, or Strontium, Bismuth is the quiet chap sitting in the corner with a cola.

     Anyway, this post came up as a result of Sophie* going a bit ga-ga on Facebook about Bismuth:

Bismuth in crystalline form

     Conrad, who has a retentive mind with no filing or organisation to it, vaguely remembered that Bismuth is a heavy metal, and that these elements are not to be taken lightly^.  A quick check reveals that it has qualities similar to lead and antimony - but that, unlike either, it has practically no toxic qualities.

     Phew!  No need to warn Sophie* about poisoning herself with heavy metal crystals.

     And then in the body of the Wikipedia notes, what turns up but Pepto-Bismol.  This, apparently, is a pabulum used to settle the queasy stomach.

Hmmm. Looks like window cleaner to me

     Well well, whaddya know.

What did I say?

Superheroes With Their Pants Down

NOT LITERALLY!  Sheesh you are a dirty-minded lot.  It's a metaphor.

     Okay, we've shone a spotlight of shame on Superman and Batman, now we turn towards that ferric icon, Iron Man.

     Everybody now knows that Tony Stark is Iron Man, which must make his life rather stressful.  If Supes blows up a city block accidentally, who can arrest him and put him in jail?  If Batty^^ runs the Batcopter through a passenger jet on approach to Gotham TX, who knows whom to arrest?

     However, if Iron Man so much as keys a passing car, no matter how tentatively, then the world and his wife know who to sue.

Like this, except with less keys

     Okay, so imagine you're one of the beautiful people, invited to a huge party with all expenses paid for by your Gigantic Motor Industry Employers.  Whilst there you bump into Tony, and you observe that he's never without a glass of whisky.  WRONG! It's actually cold tea.  Why - what is that suspicious white powder he's freely handing out?  WRONG! It's talcum powder cut with sherbet.  He's necking it from the bottle -  a Chateau Riesling, too.  WRONG! It's a bottle he emptied earlier and refilled with lemonade.

     If you were more astute you'd have been tracking Tony's social engagements, including his monthly visits to Henstridge Drama Studios, where he learns the Stanislavsky Method, all the better to put one over on the media.

Tony hamming it up at one of his drama classes.

*No, that Sophie, not this Sophie

** O very well.  From The Kites Of San Quentin

*** Surely the only mathematically-titled novel in English?

^ Do you see what I did - O you do.

^^ There aren't really any dignified contractions of "Batman"