Just in case you're not sure, a "chub" is a variety of freshwater fish. Art Department?
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| NO! Get it right, you buffoons! |
Bring on the Chub!
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| Basically, A Fish. |
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| Basically, Teeth-that-swim |
Incidentally, I did notice an image on Google:
| Ah, a film poster is always enlivened and enriched with an explosion. |
"Kingsman" - And Coincidence
I think I can review this again, as I've seen another poster for it - actually two. In the first we have the above-the-headline cast, including the young lady with prosthetic legs, who is showing off her King-Fu* moves. Unfortunately this isn't available on the internet, and I didn't take a photo, but you can trust me to be telling the truth**.
In the second new poster, we see Colin Firth approaching those same prosthetic legs, viz:
| - Unless she's a giant - or unless he's a midget - or - |
Where does the coincidence come in? Well, there I was waiting in Peppi's for my haircut and the woman opposite was chatting with the hairdresser. It turns out her sister-in-law's father is a dead ringer for Michael Caine - she's seen a photo of them together and couldn't tell them apart. As a retiree his time is his own and he sent in his details, promptly being snapped up by the film industry - so he's worked on "Kingsman", and "Interstellar" as well and a couple of other films.
Coooee! Phil? Any views on this?
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| "Just an example of the law of large numbers, Conrad. Nothing to worry about. No aliens today." |
Okay
More Coincidence
Last night I did one of those daft Buzzfeed quizzes to see how Mancunian I am, although I did jib at the question where the price of a pint was either £4.50 or £3.00 - my local (The Pleasant since the Half Way House killed off it's quiz) serves a pint for £1.80.
Anyway, one of the questions asked would I go to Tiger Tiger or the Ruby Lounge?
I'd never heard of the Ruby Lounge before, but I ticked that box.
Today in Manchester, shopping around, what did I notice for the first time ever?
| The not-very-salubrious exterior |
I think I'll give Phil a miss on this one ...
First Bus: An Insider's Information
Oh my! I have been sent an anonymous spreadsheet from a First employee, detailing bus schedules, timekeeping, driver comments and reasons for any failure to deliver services on time. I shan't post the spreadsheet itself as this might identify the whistle-blower, but it makes startling reading.
27th November
17 Service cancelled completely with no notice: Management advised that this is "to prevent passenger complacency"
24 Service departing Rochdale 14:00 delayed by ninety minutes: Driver explanation: attacked by vampire bats.
182 Service departing Picadilly Gardens 09:24 left early at 9:19: Driver explanation: hotpot waiting for him at end of shift
18th December
17 Service diverted to Glasgow with an advisory on the company website that needed a 96-character password to access. Password not provided.
83 Service departing Oldham Bus Station at 18:00 did not reach terminus at Manchester: management advised it had vanished into a temporal discontinuity at the junction of Broadway and the A57, and should reappear again in 127 years.
163 Service leaving Picadilly delayed by thirty minutes: driver explanation: "C.B.A."^
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| Ah! That's where it went! |
13th January
24 Service from Rochdale at 7:20 arrived late at Royton New Barn Street: Driver explanation: bus attacked by land-travelling sharks (Management response - "Sharks cannot be allowed to destroy First Bus property - eject passengers to act as bait and decoys")
164 Service arrived forty-five minutes late in Picadilly: driver explanation: had to divert on A57 due to surprise appearance of giant acid lake.
17 Service from Shude Hill at 18:20 arrived three hours late at Rochdale Bus Station: driver explanation: Interstellar turned out to be considerably longer than he realised
I may post some more, if I can maintain their anonymity!
| "We were only running for the bus, man. We've been, like, traduced." |
"V"
The novel by Thomas Pynchon, not the rat-eating lizard-folk version.
"Sodality" - another coincidence, seeing as how I'd never heard this word before reading "Claudius The God" last year. It means an association or brotherhood. And yes, here it is again in "V". Hmmm.
Then there's Tom's description of a planet orbiting a sun, comparing it to a yo-yo, which is curiously similar to the "wobble" method of detecting exoplanets, except Tom is writing thirty years before the technique is used. Hmmm again!
Aha! Now this bit I do recall - Rachel's rhinoplasty. This is a long and detailed description of someone getting a nose-job, detailed enough to make one's eyes water. (Conrad had a nose-job once himself, courtesy of his nose encountering a kerbstone. Just FYI). Typical Mr Pynchon, going into a process or method or operation in great detail for a character who may not even be the main one.
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| A rhino, pasty. Close enough |
A Little Musical Critique
You don't have to duck, Simon and Garfunkel, we're looking closer to home today, with The Verve and "Bittersweet Symphony". I guarantee once you hear this song it will be weeks before it finally oozes out of your head. A real earworm. Anyway, let us proceed:
'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony, this life
Well, now, Richard, you're being a bit biased here. What of us with No Sense Of Smell? And, consequently, an inability to taste either bitter or sweet? eh? Eh?
Try to make ends meet
This is most unwise! If dealing with electrical wiring - oh - oh I see. Well, don't spend what you haven't got.
You're a slave to money then you die
Wow. I bet you don't get invited to many parties.
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down
Richard! Don't exaggerate! You have certainly walked or driven down more than one road. Stop fibbing.
You know the one that takes you to the places
You're being a bit vague here, Richard. Do you mean the M25?
where all the veins meet yeah,
Ah, I see! not the M25.
The M6?
A bit of a sweet & Tympani. Close enough
I think we'll stop at the first verse there. But don't worry, there's lots more lyric to analyse! I bet you can hardly wait!^^
* Do you see what I did there? Do you? Tell me how clever I am!
** Mostly. With a variable percentage otherwise. Perhaps.
*** Not "arse" as that would be far too vulgar.
^ BOOJUM! suspects this acronym to stand for "Couldn't Be Arsed"
^^ Actually <tweaks moustache> I don't care if you can wait or not. It's MY blog!
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