Thanks to being friended on Facebook, I came across this film yesterday:
http://www.pawmygosh.com/mudd-on-trampoline/
It really is hilarious. Nothing deep or profound, just a dog having a whale of a time on a trampoline.
Now if we could just combine the light-heartedness of A Dog On A Trampoline with the tragic poignancy of A Coat-hanger At The Bus Stop, I reckon we could master 2015 with no effort at all.
A History Lesson
Don't worry, nothing dry or technical*. Way back in the late Seventies Conrad was listening to Radio One in the early evening of a Friday, where they played singles for the first time, being reviewed by a panel of invited guests. One track caught my attention: "Rice Harvest" by Blood Donor. I was never able to get a copy of this single, but I never forgot it, and yesterday I decided to look for it on Youtube.
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| Close enough |
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5zerW8Id1I
There's the link. Ah yes, The Boat People - who remembers them now?
Powers
I talk of the comic book series here - it was supposed to be out as a programme on the Playstation network but Conrad is unsure if this has happened or not. Let me check -
- It scores 8.1 over at IMDb but it doesn't appear to be available to anyone not subscribing to the Playstation network. It does, however, have The Hollywood Casting Stereotype - put a Brit in the role of the baddie. Thank you Eddie Izzard!
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| Evil Edna. Close enough. |
NO! Not about feet! "Legends" as in "Myths With A Source" thank you.
If you recall Conrad's recent hilarious parodies of Doctor Who serial titles**, then you will appreciate these details. In a big splash panel we see a cinema, and the films on show are:
"Kidney Stones From Hell"
"Attack of the 6000 Beez"
"Leprechaun 7***"
There was also a poster for "Brian Poshen Live In Nerd Rage", which is a bit more complicated, as there is a real Brian Pohsen, and a real comic called Nerd Rage - an in-joke, Conrad is inclined to think."Happy Bums" - The Explanation
Conrad warns you, gentle reader, about Googling for this, especially if you are in work.
I did post about glimpsing this mystifying bus poster earlier this week, and have now seen another bus poster, which has a right side logo depicting an airline.
However! Please do not go Googling for "Happy Bums" and "Airline", as Conrad fears you will fall foul of the "1756 Yard High Club".
Moving swiftly on -
Kettles!
We had the "KETTLE OF
Paint Kettle
Sugar Kettle
Kettle Chips
Suzie Kettles
"Crepuscular"
Conrad thought this word was associated with blood cells, which goes to show you how igorant of biology he really is, although in his defence he is a native of of the iceworld Syntagma IV in the constellation of Casterberus. Which makes it alright.
I know, I know, I can tell what you're thinking, but if they were called "Processed-denatured-additive-applied Flakes", nobody would buy then and the packets would have to be - Oh! sorry, you want to know what "crespuscular" means?
Of animals, it means those that are active at twilight, that is, dawn or dusk.
Hmmm. A bit anti-climactic, that, isn't it?
Hasselback Potatoes
There is a recipe for these in a pamphlet Conrad collected from the local Co-Op and here the rascals are:
Peeled, sliced not-quite all the way through and coated with oil and butter - and they take a lot longer than the 65 minutes the recipe claims. I've been down to check, you see, and they're not properly done yet after 80 minutes.
Good Edna
We have to reach a cosmic balance here, so please view the opposite of Evil:
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| Edna. Good - unless rolling in fox sh |
* Although I could bore you with details of the Austro-Serbian Pig War of 1904 ...
** They are hilarious! They ARE!
*** The most terrifying of all as it could so easily be true ...
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