The FIENDISH Flounder Of STING (The Bounder!)

Once  Again!
BOOJUM! lies through it's metaphorical teeth.  Old Sting might well be into various kinds of Tantric shenanigans but being in the possession of trained attack-fish is not one of them.  Still, to make it work I had to have a single-name celebrity, and Conrad is utterly out of touch with the vapid contemporary breed.  Besides, that would be edging dangerously close to Current Affairs.
     Anyway, on with the motley!

Rounders.  Close enough

When The Going Gets Tough -
The tough get a ride in a Spectrum Maximum Security Vehicle, apparently.

Jammy beggars

     Although the question did occur to Conrad - what if the opposition have acquired an MSV and decide to ram the one that you're driving?  No idle speculation this, viz:

Irresistible force meets immovable object!
Artist John Cooper, at a guess

     Other people have entirely too much time on their hands ....

I dunno.  Is this sad, awesome or both at once?

Ah, I Say, Coincidence, Is That My Seat?
If you read my motivational Facebook post this morning, you know it featured camels: the Dromedary and the Bactrian, otherwise known as One Lump or Two.
     Fast forward to an hour later and Conrad is reading "The History of the 42nd East Lancashire Division" in the Great War.  One company of the Lancashire Fusiliers are sent to Egypt, and thence to the Sudan, and are posted to Khartoum, where they are instructed to form -
     - the British Camel Corps.

No!  Art, you idiot -

     That's one coincidence too many that early in the day.
     In fact there was another to come in the body of the text.  The Lancashire Fusiliers drew it's men from Manchester, Salford, Oldham, Rochdale, Wigan and Bury; not much chance of gaining experience with animals other than horses, or cows.   So it was with faint hope that their officer addressed his men, asking if any of them had experience of working with camels.

                                Where's my gun?  I've got a gun somewhere, haven't I?   

 Faint hope? Yes.  But not no hope.  From the ranks one man strode forth; he had working in the menagerie of Bostock in Cheshire, and yes!  he had experience of work with camels.

What?  What!
"A ship fitted with ship camels"

     Ah, I give up.  Who knew there were so many camels?

Art did!

Dark Star: "Benson, Arizona"
As you surely know by now, gentle reader, John Carpenter has made some of the most frightening documentaries in the history of media.  What you may not know is that he began his film career by making a low-budget yet extremely inventive science-fiction satire called "Dark Star", after which major studios began to pay attention.

     The reason Conrad brings all this up is that he's had the Dog Buns! opening song to "Dark Star" going through his head all day today for no very good reason.  That opening song is "Benson, Arizona", and herewith the link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wbzJxXxhIQ

     Never made explicit, the lyrics deal with a spaceship crewman travelling at relatavistic speeds across space.  If you've seen "Interstellar" then you'll get the gist; this un-named crewman ages far more slowly than his love back on Earth.  A year of subjective time for him could well be forty years for her.  Here's a link with the lyrics and some comments from the singer:

http://www.benzedrine.ch/darkstar.html

     Conrad would also like to point out that the music was composed by John, who is a talented musician in his own right*.

Coincidence!  Get Out Of My Seat!
Saw one of these parked up near my terminus this morning:

Celtic name, works with Poles

     Why is this significant?  Well, because Conrad's surname for those who want to know is "Connolly", which he usually has to inform listeners is spelt "as in Billy"*.

Well Now
If Conrad were to describe a television program from the Sixties that was made with puppets, and which featured a spaceship that tootled around the solar system righting wrongs, doubtless you'd immediately respond "Fireball XL5"
     You'd be WRONG!
     WRONG WRONG WRONG!
     WR ***-
     I refer, obviously - obviously! - to the series "Space Patrol".
     This was a black and white television series that came out in 1962, with episodes half an hour long, featuring the crew of "Galasphere 347".  

347 comes in to land

     What Conrad liked about this beast is that it didn't look remotely like anything before it as a spaceship, and it's certainly not spherical^.  Let's see the cast:

One of these is the Martian "Gabblerdictum Bird."  Good luck deciding which!

    Oh, don't let the cast here fool you, this show was rooted firmly in the early Sixties; the women were secretaries and PAs and the hunky chunky men went out to tidy up the spacelanes^^.
     The series has another claim to fame - that it uses the first electronic theme tune ever, at least seven months in advance of Doctor Who, and indeed the theme does sound rather like a monophonic synthesizer.


Ruff Mix
Never let a dog near a vocoder or you end up with this.  You can choose to listen to it or not, back when originally released it was all over the place:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2l6EPIeY81c

     Enter at your own peril!

No poems tonight as it's already rather late.  Sorry!

* This doesn't smack too much of hero-worship, does it?
** As a penalty of transliterating from Celtic to English, there are an apparently infinite number of ways of spelling "Connolly".  Although "Connolly" is the only proper one.
*** Alright, you've made your point <courtesy Mister Hand>
^ Although that spherical force field might be a nod to the "Spindizzy" shield of James Blish's "Okie" science fiction novels.
^^ Conrad merely observes and does not make any judgements <sniggers>