Benbecula

It's Not What You Think It Is
Or at least it's not if you consider it to be a man's name.  Nor is it some ghastly pun upon "Dracula", such as "Blacula" or "Bunnicula*"
     It is, in fact, one of the islands of the Outer Hebrides.  Small, with a population of about 1,000 people, it boasts stunning beaches -

Beautiful.  But also 30 Below Zero

      - which will kill from hypothermia in minutes outside the height of summer.
     Oh, there is only one cash-point on the entire island, at the airport.  Yes, it has an airport.  Who says you can't be a small island and still think big?

Syzygy
Again, apologies for this completely random word popping up in my head, what can I say, Monday morning does things to a man's** mind.
     What does it mean?  And where does it come from?
     It probably wouldn't surprise you to know that it's from Ancient Greek, "Suzugos", meaning "Joined together".

No!
Well, maybe.
Okay, yes.

     There are several different types of syzygy*** but the one Conrad is interested in is the astronomical one.  Technically it's the lining up of three planetary bodies in a straight line - for example, the Sun, the Earth and the Moon.  This will result in an eclipse, and also moonquakes, which is a bit of a bummer for all those prospective Lunar colonists intending to set up in the Sea of Tranquility.

"Fixer-Upper opportunity, great views of Earth"

"V": Conrad's Reportage
No!  I don't mean the rat-eating lizardy invader television series.  The novel by Thomas Pynchon.  Two things to report about it today.  Firstly the word "Achphenomenon", which might be a real German word (I shall Google) - but apparently isn't.  Naughty Thomas!
     And the second, I hear you ask?  One character is reading an "avant garde Western" called "Existentialist Sherrif", which made Conrad laugh out loud on the bus^.

Not so much "Existentialist" as "Zen"

Rejected Doctor Who Serial Titles
Oh my these do amuse me.  Still no critical comments, so they will simply continue to come.  Sorry about that.  Today with added original titles, so you can all see how clever I am.

"The Whee In Space" ("The Wheel In Space")

"The Mind Gobber" ("The Mind Robber")

"The Invigilators" ("The Dominators")

"The Sods of Death" ("The Seeds of Death")

"The Space Pilates" ("The Space Pirates")

"The Tinvasion" (The Invasion")

"The Protons" ("The Krotons")

     That's about all the series up until the Third Doctor.  So there are still forty years to go!

O2 Adverts
One of these in The Metro caught Conrad's eye, and not in a good way.  You remember that fuss I made about "Be more dog", which seemed to be a peculiar way to promote electronic technology?

"Ground Control to Ginger Tom ..."

     A cat in a spacesuit is not quite what Conrad envisages when the tagline "Out of this world!" comes up.  Cats, dogs, Orang-utangs - when will this madness cease!

Conrad: So Hip He's A Trip^^
Well I do hang around with the stars.  Er, Alison, anyway, the vocalist from From The Kites Of San Quentin.  She was all buzzed up today as she was getting a "Theremini", which is a modern miniature version of the Theremin.
     Which is not a brand of herbal tea or a tubular bandage.  Allow me to illustrate:

Conductor's baton optional

     This is the older design from the Thirties. Here's a more up to date one:

Make mine Moog

     The Theremini is the very latest version, chock-filled with digital goodness:

How dare you!  It is so NOT like a clock radio!
Okay it is a bit.

     You will, I guarantee, have heard theremins in action.  Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love" has them, as does The Beach Boy's "Good Vibrations".

Finally
One of the constants about Edna is her freaking determination to chase the blue plastic laundry ball at every opportunity.  It was slightly too large for her to get her jaws around it - until this weekend.

Edna 1  Blue Ball 0

* Really.  He's a vampire rabbit.  See below.
** Yes, I know calling Conrad anything near human is a stretch, just allow me some poetic licence, okay?
*** Can you think of any other word with three "y"s?
^ Behaviour like this guarantees an empty seat next to you.
^^ AN INNOCENT TRIP TO THE SEASIDE!  Not the other kind.

I knew you wouldn't believe me unless -