Rivers And Ravers And Rovers

Yes, Yes, I Used That As A Facebook Title
Sue me.  Be quick, I'm off to Mars in a week or so.  We covered the River Fleet in this afternoon's post, and now we're back to the Thames, or rather it's estuary, in a topic that once again originates from Thursday's Pub Quiz.

Estuary to the right

     "Have you heard of 'The Mystery Jets'?" asked Phil, who keeps pretty up-to-date on modern music (much like your humble scribe).  Conrad had indeed heard of them, but not heard them.
     This subject matter had it origins in a holiday Phil and Rosie had taken on the South coast, where they were able to see distant structures out at sea, away in the Thames estuary.  Unidentified, they had put the matter behind them - until the Mystery Jets showed up with their video for "Bubblegum".
     Hay Pesto, there they were, performing atop those very same structures.  Which are the Maunsell Forts.  These constituted an artificial island well out to sea, plonked there during the Second Unpleasantness, where spotters and radar and anti-aircraft guns could interdict fiendish Teuton aircraft flying up the estuary to commit dastardly deeds.

Hello Huns!

     Typically Perfidious Albion, eh?  Any Teutonic aerial invader would expect a free run up the Thames, especially from the estuary because it's all water, no land, hence no anti-aircraft guns - oh I say are those anti-aircraft guns shooting big holes in my aircraft?  Doubtless there were some frightfully surprised Teuton aircrew before word got around.
     They also feature in the Doctor Who reconstruction "Fury from the Deep", made in 1967 when the Forts still resembled their wartime iteration (that above is Forties vintage).
     Okay, time for a bit of Mystery.  Art?

The sonic scamps in question

     They are filmed performing atop one of the Forts,  which you can see in the background above.  This is rather worrying, and I strongly doubt that the MJ's got permission to film up there because these things are so old and corroded that they have the hue of an over-ripe banana.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzxwujoJLNc

     There's the link if you want to watch "Bubblegum", which I would recommend as it's a catchy little ditty.
     I also doubt that they were actually performing live up there with all their equipment powered and amped up, because - well, for one thing, where is the power coming from?  Secondly, because if the bass player hits a chord the whole tower would probably collapse into the sea.

Aged, rusty and minus their walkways

     If they were using a Schaller amplifier then that would indeed be a caustic irony, since Schaller is a Teuton brand of amp ...

Movieweb, You Are A Idiot
Yes, that's a deliberate grammatical error, because I want to be as scathing as possible.  Movieweb is one of those bizarre links that Facebook throws up, apparently at random.  After all, who here in the Allotment needs 'Log-counting software'?  Not I.

Fans of Spiderman?

     The reason for my Simmering Nitric Ire is one of their stupid clickbaiting posts on FB about "Films with the potential to be flops of summer 2017".
     They instantly take aim and shoot themselves in the foot, before sticking said foot in their mouth, and then falling over due to blood loss and inability to balance.
     "Cool mixed metaphors, Conrad!" I hear you enthuse.  "But why is your Strategic Rage deployed?"
     Two reasons.  Their annoying photograph depicts several still from 2017 films, including one for "Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets".  Which has not yet opened.  Don't try and deflect criticism of this guff with "potential" either, that's a get-out clause in case their predictions end up being garbage.

Is it me, or is Valerian a little - young?

     They do output garbage in the case of "Wonder Woman" because it's already made $666 million, from a budget of $150 million.  And it's only just been released.  Oh look, Movieweb is now trying to cram their other foot in their mouth.  Probably best to take the left one out, first, mate.

Wonder no longer.

Finally -
I did warn you that I'm off to Mars in the near future.  Don't worry, thanks to a handy chap I know who can zap back and forth in the Fourth (Dimension, that is), I shan't be gone for more than two or three minutes, ten tops.  The reason is - well, it's easier to show you.  Art?

Rovers in the wild

     In fact I wanted to see the Mysteron's Complex (which is a popular tourist destination of the future, apparently) only to be told that it's off-limits in the Twenty-First century, so I'm going for the next best option - the Martian Rovers, because the Pyramids are no canals have all dried up.

"Stop giving the future away!"