I admit it, and indeed it could probably do with focussing a little more closely on a specific topic, such as Will The Large Hadron Collider Destroy The World With Strange Particles*? or When Will Reality Television Producers Be Up On Crimes Against Entertainment Charges?
I have to shake myself and move on here, or the whole of today's post would be a rant against the many, many things in the world today that irk your humble scribe.
Well, keep in mind that BOOJUM! is in the middle of a Charm Offensive. We'll come back to this, as the What Could Possibly Go Wrong? about that is that the SAS Pagoda Five Counter-Revolutionary Warfare team come in through the windows.
| "Conrad! Put the teapot down!" |
Ah!
A positive light-bulb moment.
If that guess above is true, perhaps your gifted author ought to remain an anarchistic arsonist**, in order to maintain the interest of Authority. Because after all a hit on the site is still a hit, right?
So - the Anti-Charm Offensive Rules
1) ZOMBIES!
2) ATOM BOMBS!
3) BLAMMING THE SPIT OUT OF THE MOON! (with atom bombs, of course)
4) WHOLE ARMOURED DIVISIONS OF TANKS!
5) EXPLOSIONS! EXPLOSIONS LEFT, RIGHT AND CENTRE. Maybe also UP and DOWN.
BOOJUM! - where being inconsistent is the only consistent thing.
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| Also with extra added mutant weasel bananas |
Whitby: What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
More accurately, Robin Hood's Bay. The clan are off there for Darling Daughter's 21st Birthday. So, a holiday by the seaside, in the depths of winter, amidst probably the wettest season Britain's ever had.
One thing that might happen is a collapse in blog visitors, as whilst we might cheat and post a couple of things from 2013 and 2014 on Thursday, we shall be off-line Friday and Saturday. Expect a lot of photos when we get back.
| Robin Hood's Bay. Before |
"Hurricane Erik, approaching from the Norwegian coast, is set to bring the worst weather in human history to the historic Yorkshire coastline -"
| Robin Hood's Bay. After |
As Previously Threatened
The Service Delivery Christmas do. Conrad finds these things very uncomfortable to attend, given that they tend to embrace high jinks and lots of drinks, with the constant threat of dancing hovering in the background. However, since I had to endure it, you can also experience a little of the zeitgeist.
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| Catherine looking slinky, Steve with a drinky |
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| The Ladeez. Conrad. Lucky chap |
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| The Venue. A railway station. |
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| More venue, because you can never have too much Venue. |
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| Before. |
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| Dodgems. Plus alcohol. What Can Possibly Go Wrong? |
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| Waltzers. As above, except with vomiting |
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| The Circus. Conrad is unsure if 5 people qualify as a Circus. Perhaps a troupe? |
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| The time. So much for a 7:30 start Food still not arrived. Other guests move away warily as your humble scribe eyes them, with a sinister hungry gleam in his eye ... |
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| Katie was staggering. No! Shoe problems |
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| After. That small bottle of Budweiser cost £28.25 |
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| Your gifted author, chock-ful of Christmas spirit. Or indigestion, it can be hard to tell. |
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| Danglified folk |
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| See Photo 6 |
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| See Photo 7 |
Today I probably impressed and frightened Sophie with my in-depth knowledge of nuclear weapons, nuclear war and nuclear war-fighting strategy. Back in the day I'd like to think I brought a similar level of Clever to the IMDB forums about "The Battle of Britain".
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| Conrad: infesting the internet for at least nine years |
Okay, under the normal word count but it's getting late and I have to go plan how to take over Bermuda. You have to start small with this world domination effort, you know.
* No
** In METAPHOR only, Your Honour
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