Guilty Pleasures

NO! I Am Not Talking About The Metro -
 - and it's lying assertion that it has "4 pages" of Guilty Pleasures, which actually consists of 2 pages of adverts, a lot of stock photographs, some un-attributable quotes from un-named "friends" or "associates", big fonts and very little content*.
     You may condemn BOOJUM! with those very same terms but at least we, the editorial staff** here, have our own stringent rules and criteria for including items and articles.  True, those criteria may become infinitely elastic or disappear altogether, but - whose blog is it?

This chap's, and no perhaps.
(Tagline:"I'm an utter coward.  I must be.  I've lost my bottle.")

     Excuse me whilst I boot up "Z Nation" Season 2 Episode 13 - and cross my fingers that Vasquez doesn't get toasted - you can't count on any character surviving in this series, which is what makes it interesting and infuria -

Not sure, but this looks like Vasquez in full lamping-on style

     - sorry, going off at a tangent there.  Guilty pleasures.  In order to avoid destroying my Impeccable Music Street Cred, I shall not venture forth into which bands I like that are actually Lightweight Pop instead of Bonkers Mathcore Prog-Metal.  No, we are talking about television programmes like "Traffic Cops" here.  These shows all have a similar format:  dashcam and film crew footage of police in cars whizzing about the countryside and towns at high speed, attempting to prevent or minimise mayhem thanks to idiots and criminals, or idiot criminals.

Someone here is in trouble.
Very big trouble.

     Conrad usually sits frothing with rage, occasionally venting in bad language, at the antics of the dunderheads who think that they are a combination of The Stig and Superman, with a dash of Steve McQueen thrown in, simply because they are in a car.  Then he air-punches the sky at the programme's conclusion where it reveals that " - the driver was jailed for twenty-four months and banned from driving for ten years", all along secretly wishing that they were jailed for ten years and banned from driving for Eternity***.
     Yesterday's programme was interesting in that it showed the Awesome Power Of Technology, specifically Automatic Number Plate Recognition.  Police cars have a number plate reader that allows them to spot Bad Uns instantly.  This led to a chase that collared a driver who was i) Banned and ii) Without insurance, and <air-punch> matey got arrested.

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     The hilarious follow-up to this was the police involved, in six cars, debating whether they were in England or Wales, as whoever's turf the arrest took place on had to process the prisoner.  Clearly the paperwork involved in this is a chore as neither the English nor Welsh coppers wanted to lay claim to the prisoner.  The Welsh won, or lost, according to your point of view, and had to take the naughty driver away with them.
     Another slightly scarier escapade was a drunk driver who had failed to stop, and who had been "stung", twice.  This means his car had driven over two Stingers, which look rather like they came out of a Roadrunner cartoon, but which will puncture and deflate vehicle tyres.  If you carry on driving, which matey did, your tyres shred apart in minutes and you end up driving on bare metal rims.

A Stinger.  This will, indeed, stop a car.
Or a tank.

     This is a Bad Thing.  On metal rims you have absolutely no traction, meaning your car glides across the road like a quarter-ton ballet dancer wearing a blindfold.  Predictably, when matey tried to drive around a roundabout, he hit it head on.  Then he got arrested <air-punch>.

Christmas. Apparently It's Here
Although, if you go by supermarket displays, it's been here since late September.  Conrad has a hard time generating goodwill at any time of the year, let alone when it's cold, dark, wet and windy.  Thankfully the Mansion staff are rather more earnest and willing, viz:

Solar-powered lights - no electricity bill but worryingly dependent on the Sun

Our Post-Modern Ironic Digital Fireplace-in-the-fireplace

Sally's finest, embroidered with bells

     Don't forget, folks, once it's December 27th it's time to start celebrating Valentine's Day.
     Bah!

Your Mileage May Vary
If you recall anything about your gifted author, you know that he not only has a sweet tooth, he has 48 of them^.  Hence he dived right into this little lot:

     And they're not bad.
     Although since this is from the man who thinks Lime Pickle is wonderful, once again, your view may differ.

Sodium Carbomer
Please note the emphasis here is on the first syllable, not the second, as "Car Bomber" is likely to trip the ever-sensitive noses of MI5 and UNIT, whereas "Carbomer" is merely a chemical compound.
     Yes, yes, I've been at the ingredients list again.  Another guilty pleasure.

     Just to prove how diligent I am, or how sad, or both simultaneously, I did check on this compound and I've not covered it before.
     So - what is it?  Well, it's used to thicken and stabilise cosmetics, and is effective in very low concentrations, which means cheapness, always something that the corporate world likes to hear.



* Apologies for ranting but - I feel deeply about this issue. Being in the media business myself, as you might say.
** Actually only me.  Plus Oscar, my memory.  And Art, the picture provider.
*** Sigh. So much for my liberal reputation.
^  Alien, you see.  Differently dentalled.