Well, "clever" in my own head. Being cut off from the -on-line community for the past four days has meant Conrad has been rather out of the loop as concerns the latest news. Getting back on-line reveals latest news to consist of mostly less-recent news, i.e. a whole lot of bloodshed and unpleasantness, ad nauseum. Nothing new there! Still, as BOOJUM! is allergic to Religion, Current Affairs and Politics you didn't have to worry about the Current Affairs bit of that. With no internet access I can't check out the sci-fi hating Auntie Beeb*, and since we travelled to and from Yorkshire via car not bus I'm not picking up The Metro - although up here in North Yorkshire Arriva is almost as bad as First Bus, For Your Information.
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| First Bus HR |
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| Arriva HR |
QUICK! QUICK! NURSE THE SCREENS - oh - here's a remote control that'll do instead -
Let us now
From Hell's Heart I Stab At Thee, Coincidence -
Yes indeedy Ally Sheedy. Normally this happened when I read Thomas Pynchon, but of late the wobbling of reality and causality is spreading to whichever book your humble scribe is reading. Take this, for instance.
Some months ago I purchased an autobiography called "At War With The 16th Irish Division" which anyone, and here I cast myself on your impartial judgement, would have imagined would feature very strongly places and placenames in Ireland.
Well, yes, except the author is actually from -
Whitby.
And where are we going to celebrate Darling Daughter's 21st Birthday?
Whitby!
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| Whitby. Pretty obviously. It's not Ougadougou, is it? |
"Crucial Trading"
and then -
"Crucial Interiors"
upon their exterior designs.
Clearly the universe is still trying to tell your humble scribe something, although it would be more convenient if it could either be e-mailed or sent on a postcard.
Star Wars And Arms
More of this obscure cult film - I do apologise for wasting your time with Conrad's personal favourites that nobody else has ever heard of - and here we return to the theme of "Arms". Wars, as I am sure you will agree, are fought with weapons. Arms, you might say. Which are a theme across the decent Star Wars films. Star Wars IV: Ugly violent brute at bar - gets his arm chopped off. C3PO - gets his arm knocked off. Big Ugly Snow Critter in "The Empire Strikes Back" - arm chewed off (actually lasered off but I was going for poetic effect). Luke gets part of his arm sliced off in TESB. C3PO gets both arms shot off in TESB. Darth Vader gets a laser-slash on his arm. In Return Of The Jedi, Darth gets his hand sliced off. Even Leia gets shot in the arm.
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| No, Luke, no. She's your si - and that's a Jedi rolling-pin |
DANGER WILL ROBINSON!
Will it? What if Danger - No! Let us get back on track.
This is nothing to do with "Lost In Space" and everything to do with "Lost on the B5107", which, if it existed, might be a road on the North Yorkshire Moors. Conrad, paying scant attention whilst en route to Whitby, noticed a small, low-profile sign at the side of the road.
"RAF Fylingdales", it read.
If you were there you would have seen your humble scribe erupt in a fury of interest. 99.9% of the UK population have not heard of Fylingdales, and of that 0.1% who have, 99.9% have no idea what it is, nor what it does.
Conrad knows. It exists under the appellation "BMEWS", which sounds like a terrible pun, and it's terrible alright, yet not punny at all. Are you "Bemused"? You will be.
"BALLISTIC MISSILE EARLY WARNING SYSTEM", that is, it ceaselessly scans space over Siberia to suss out SS-21 launches. Last your humble scribe knew, it could pick up an object six feet tall being blammed out of a silo.
During the Cold War, it manifested as a triple golf-ball radome complex.
Now, it's an electronically-steerable radar, which simply sucks all the romance out of Countervailing Strategy.
* All will become clear in time. Trust me**.
** Maybe tomorrow.
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