That she's had lots of plastic surgery. This is pretty obvious if you look at your standard Cardassian, who cannot be called "easy on the eyes" unless you, too, come from a background of humanoid snakes:
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| Cardassian - now with extra added neck! |
| What evil thoughts lurk under that plastic exterior? |
Well, I have to say it's nice to have the problem of Too Much Material. This is - stop me if I get boringly self-congratulatory here - because I now have notebooks that I contrive to keep full of ideas as they strike me. A couple of years ago I tended to sit down at the PC, utterly devoid of inspiration, and take two hours to mash something up.
Anyway, let's see what we can get through before 8 p.m. because that's when Bake Off starts -
"Dimetrodon"
Now I know what you're thinking, and no, it isn't a dinosaur. It predates them by 45 million years. Do keep up! The name is Greek, meaning "Two Measures of Teeth", as it had teeth of two different sizes.
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| See? |
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| There you are. |
Also, I can't help but hear Johnny Rotten singing about this creature, to the tune of "Pretty Vacant":
"DIMETRODON!
It's all a great big con
Paleontology you moron
It has a sail upon
Why talk about teeth
When the SAIL beggars belief?"
A Few Points About "Star Trek The Next Generation"
This cropped up in my mind because I'd been watching "First Contact" and Captain Picard tells an envoy of the 21st Century that in the Federation they no longer use money.
Oh Rly? Well take a look at this well-established practice:
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| Metaphorically |
And another thing. Does this woman have a deformity of the nose? or is she an ALIEN SPECIES!
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| "Well, the make-up budget was maxxed-out, so ..." |
Ah! First Bus! Transport Most Ruinous!
Only First could turn a bus ride into a thrilling adventure, for which read "a grim sweaty endurance test".
Standing at the bus stop on Oldham Street, with an even larger crowd of passengers than usual, it became apparent that neither the 181 or 182 had turned up. Silly us for assuming this would happen!
Then the 24 was ten minutes late, for no apparent reason, no roadworks or traffic jams on the other side of the road all the way to Royton, and had to accomodate all the 181 and 182 passengers, meaning it left the town centre so late the next 24 came in as we drove out.
Then we hit big traffic jams on Broadway - which is to be expected - and in Chadderton, which is not. By the time we got to Royton the bus driver decided we had to get off there, not Rochdale, and catch the next 409.
Which we did. And, as we ascended Tandle Hill, we were overtaken by that other 24.
Which was empty.
There's a moral here, but since I want to keep the blog SFW I'm not going to print it!
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| A First Bus spokesdemon says: "How dissstresssing Conrad! Ssssee you ssssoon." |
"The Leopard" By Jo Nesbo
I picked this up as my fiction partner to whichever factual book I carry in my bag, because I've got one of his novels hiding somewhere that I've not read yet.
Well, it wasn't this one. I recognised the broad outline of the plot, and that it ends badly, in Africa, but I read it so long ago I can't remember the details.
It also made me check out IMDB and see how "The Snowman" is getting along. This is the previous novel in chronological order to "The Leopard" and I see that Michael Fassbender's name is attached to it.
Now, there's no character name attached in turn to Michael, so Conrad is wondering who's been cast as the anti-hero Harry Hole? Harry, you see, is a monster of a man. When he walks into a room, people stop and pay attention. His imposing size comes across as impressive background detail, and you'd need someone the size of Gregory Peck or Clint Walker to play him.
So - SPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILER
- If Michael's not cast as Harry, I reckon he's been cast as the villain ...
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| Inspector Hole. An artists impression |
* We will glide over Conrad's status as an alien spy in disguise here ...
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