Conrad - Sober For October

Not In Any Organised Way, Mind
As I am far too disorganised, anarchistic and secretive to actually sign up with any particular entity promoting this as a cause.  Now, we all know that Conrad likes his beer, especially at the weekend, so this will be interesting, to say the least.  Tea and lemonade consumption will increase hugely, I can predict that much with near-certainty at least.  What a shame, though, that October has 31 days and not 30.  Or even 29.  I bet there's folding money awaiting the person who can dream up a phrase meaning "sober" and have it meld or rhyme with "February".

Conrad, horrendously drunk

Conrad, incredibly sober

     I'm glad we got that difference cleared up then.  Just so you know.

The Killer In The Kitchen
If you read the blog last night - and reading BOOJUM! is the only way to be spared either mental enslavement or being sent to the Organ Repository when my invasion fleet gets here - then you will recall the arachnid apparition that had turned up in the bathroom, before pulling a Jedi invisibility trick and vanishing.
     Well, it - or a close relative - turned up in the kitchen last night as I was assembling my lunch for today, blatantly out in the open on the wall above the sink.
     Wearily, I contemplated it.  I didn't have my camera and I wasn't (this is at 10:30 p.m.) going to trawl all the way back upstairs for it to provide proof to you lot.  Instead I pointed it out to Jenny.
     'There it is, Jenny!  It's moving!  Go get it!"
     I believe this is what South Canadians call "siccing", except in Jenny's case it was more akin to "sitting".  Thanks for that, Jenny.

This is recycling, not - er - cheating

More Of Sheridan The Screaming Skull
If you have a long memory then you recall that Conrad got this as a present from Darling Daughter, aptly enough as the old Radio Tin lunchbox was on the way out thanks to rust and dints.

Classy, eh?

     Sheridan also serves as a handy portable and reusable cat toilet, at least according to Jenny, as I left the box open last week whilst Bake Off was on.  Returning to the kitchen an hour later, Sheridan appeared to be full of liquid, which meant emptying it out and a hot wash followed by drying - and airing - on the clothesline overnight.  Thanks for that, Jenny.

Bus Posters
Really, Conrad cannot be endlessly creative, he does require SOME external input from time to time, and - honestly?  Those bus posters of late have been dismal, falling down on the job.  "Select", "UEFA", "Lucozade", The Walk", "Barclays -" and there my brain glazed over and refused to continue with the rest of whatever it was.
     MUST TRY HARDER!

Two bores for the price of one

Television Channels
When dogsitting Conrad does tend to have television on, even if only to check out the occasionally bizarre channels present.  My exhaustive analysis proves that the Horror Channel has 0% horror content, at least during daytime.  The CBS "Entertainment Channel" is lying as all they show is "Little House On The Prairie".  There's an awful lot of channels devoted to jewellery - 0% interest from this quarter.  Likewise the craft stuff, although these do generate the odd interesting title that the blog can mock.

Horror, in it's own special way

"Engines Of War" By Christian Wolmar
All you need to do to render a wargamer or military historian comatose is mention "logistics".  This is the movement of people, supplies and equipment in wartime, and indeed one of the dullest, driest and most sleep-inducing chapters in the history of the written word is in the British Official History of the Second World War in the Mediterranean, Volume IV I think.  I literally fell asleep reading about the Eighth Army's supply arrangements to get it across North Africa in pursuit of the routed Rommel.

The lush agricultural pastures of - ah, who am I kidding.  The  desert.

     Thankfully Christian's work is more readable.  His book is about the effect of railways on warfare, from direct tactical influence to strategic planning and movement.  I'm up to the chapter dealing with the British building a railway to help them re-conquer the Sudan, after the locals had the temerity to rise up in rebellion.
     I also had an epiphany.  If logistics and railways are the sinews of war, all we need to ensure World Peace In Weeks is to have First Bus take over all strategic military movement.  Swords into gearsticks in nothing flat!

The Grail way.  Close enough

"SPECTRE"
Yes, Conrad refers to the James Bond spectacular due out shortly, which is a bit of a wonder, as you'd imagine a franchise like this would come out during the summer blockbuster season.
     Then again, perhaps this release date is a canny attempt to avoid competition with other summer blockbusters.
     Anyway, have a gander at this:

You What?

     Despite the picture being Daniel Craig, the blurb is all about an obscure Seventies horror film also called "Spectre", starring Robert Culp and Gig Young.  It's not bad for what it is, yet it does not merit NINE showings on the Tuesday!
     Someone has blundered.