The Polar Espresso

Fooled You!
I bet you weren't expecting that, eh?  Of course, I can see you groaning from here, thinking that with coffee-based puns, there won't ever be an end to these dreadful titles.
     Quite right.
     Okay, first off, we have to direct your attention to a chap called 'Bismark'.

The real thing

     No, Art, no  <sounds of subhuman coal-eating sloven being Tazered*> not that Bismark - try again, once the agonising paralysis wears off.

The real real thing

     Better!  Our compatriot of the internet Bismark came to my attention when he was describing how Finland got it's hands on the Sinister's Mig-21, at a time when nobody else was allowed to own these racehorses of the sky.  Trying to woo them away from the Wicked West, it seems.
     This has nothing at all to do with Dunkirk, which has been in the headlines recently thanks to Chris Nolan's film.  Bismark has a Youtube video analysing why the Luftwaffe was unable to single-handedly defeat the British (and French) defenders at Dunkirk, and put up a screen showing what the airborne Tuetons had achieved.  Art?

     I like it.  The British are represented by - a teapot.  How very apt.
     Okay, now that I've parlayed a single picture into several hundred words, we can strap the motley onto a flimsy rubber raft and hurl it into the ocean.

Veracity
I might make this a more regular feature, as it satisfies my inner pedant, and my outer pedant, too, and allows me to bang on about war films.
     Going back to "Kelly's Heroes" - please note that they correctly apostrophise the title - I noticed that Harry Dean Stanton is down as merely "Dean Stanton".  Perhaps his full name would have taken up too much space?
     Anyway, veracity, or truthfulness**.  Allow me to demonstrate with a screenshot of the opening credits.

The real real real thing

     Now, those definitely look like Wehrmacht artillery pieces of the period, rather than a pair of South Canadian 105mm howitzers painted grey.  

The real real real real thing

Notice also that they are using the Fraktur font in the credits, which would not have gone down AT ALL WELL with contemporary Teutons.  It was ditched in 1941 because of suspicions about it being a bit - well - Jewish.

Damn Your Eyes, Edna!
One of Wonder Wifey's predilictions whilst out shopping is buying new soft toys for our miniature domesticated wolf, Edna.  These do not last long as she delights in chewing the stuffing out of them, in every sense of the word.  Gnash chomp render, and the hapless elephant or duck is spilling it's guts across the living room carpet***.

Possibly a Red Panda?

     The latest purchase is a lemur (we think) and last night I nearly trod on the wretched thing out in the darkened upper hallways of The Mansion.  For a moment I worried it was the miniature domesticated wolf herself, because she blends in perfectly in the dark.
     Fortunately for both of us, it was merely the lemur.  Take note of it's pristine condition, because I assure you this will not last for long.

Sinister Truth Revealed - Blog By Dog!!!
No, not really.  I mean, she does generate content, but the hard work is done by your humble scribe.  Dog paws also not made for typing.

     Here is Edna, having magisterially slipped into my still-warm space in the Sekrit Layr, and no, she didn't deferentially move out when Conrad returned.  Obviously I am not seen as lord and master by this particular hound.
     Later, Edna, later.

Meet The Doctor
No, not that Doctor, although some of you may have gone and read my rather long fan fiction via the link of yesterday.  No, I refer to Doctor Johnson, whom Google reminds us was born 308 years ago today.
     "He must be rather decrepit by now," I hear you say, and I have to break the sad news to you that he is extremely dead indeed.
     The good Doctor did not suffer fools at all, let alone gladly, and is known for several pithy sayings.  One particularly apposite one is "Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel" and the practical truth of this can be seen if you bother to cast an eye over the news.

The good Doctor, no doubt cooking up some witty put-down

          The real reason I'm putting this here is because he practically invented the dictionary that we know and revere today (Conrad lovingly clutches his own enormous tome to his chest)^.  His "Dictionary of the English Language" is a landmark in literary works that was not bettered for almost 2 centuries afterwards.

Ooooh!  Not quite word-porn, but getting there

      As someone who mucks about with language on a daily basis, and who will quite happily sit down and browse a dictionary for fun, I can do no more than salute the good Doctor.  Ave!^^

Finally -
As proof of the above, I cannot resist a bit of visual punnery.  Art?  Oh, stop whining.  Crutches are not an excuse.

The reel thing

      I think that constitutes enough of an assault on sensibleness and stoicism for today.
     Chin chin!


*  Don't waste your pity on him.  He deserves it.
**  I'm not going to go into the etymology here.  Just assume it has Latin roots.
***  Fabric guts.  Not the real thing.
^  Everyone reveres their dictionaries, am I right?
^^ Which is Latin.  That's the joke.