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Sunday, 17 September 2017

Planet Tearror

Well, It Amuses Me
And I'm the one who matters here, as I posted on Facebook to say so.  You lot matter somewhat less, although I shall be relatively benign when I take over; except for Russell Brand, him I can't stand.  He will, in fact, feature on the permanently-broadcast Torture Telly, where those I dislike get their richly-deserved comeuppance.  There will be an app for you to suggest other victims, although you don't need to bother nominating the flat-chested stripper Miles Syrus or whatever her name is, she's booked in right after Russell.
Image result for abba the movie
Now this - this would be torture for Conrad
     Okay!  That terrifying glimpse into your future aside, let us - yes, that's correct, if you read BOOJUM! then you will be spared being sent to the uranium mines - let us proceed.
     The plan is to start the blog a little earlier than usual, then get some of that food stuff you can't operate without, perhaps walk Edna (valuable time to think up more tea-based puns), nip down to the Co-Op to see what they have going cheap/off/both, do  laundry and in there somewhere, watch "Kelly's Heroes".
     First, let us put a jester's hat on the motley and push it outside the tent.  En avant!

"Cocktail Time" By P. G. Wodehouse
The thing about Plum (PGW's nickname, not the fruit) is that he seems to have had a classical education, since he drops in allusions to Greek or Latin phrases that are not always clear to a modern reader.  CT is definitely set in post-Second Unpleasantness Britain, and indeed even features television as a minor plot point, proving that we are no longer in the land of early Bertie Wooster.  However, mention is made of " - the troops of Midian -" and this reference is unknown to your modest artisan.
     A quick touch of Google-fu and it appears that this line has some resonance, as there are other folks querying what it means.  It seems to be partially a Biblical reference, as the hostile folk of Midian were defeated by Gideon, and there's a line in a Victorian song about how the "troops of Midian, Prowl and Prowl around."
Image result for troops of midian
Midian - on the meridian?
     "Ah, enlightened," I hear you say.  "Good, because -"
     Hold on!  I've not finished.  There is also mention of a friendship between "Damon and Pythias" - but more of that anon.  Go on, I know you were dying to get back to "Police Interceptors".

Why "Kelly's Heroes"?
O I thought you'd never ask!  Because one of the supporting actors, playing Willard, was Harry Dean Stanton, a fine character thesp, who left this mortal coil recently.  Let me see if I can dig up a picture by giving Art some motivation with a cattle prod <sound of electric buzzing and muted shrieks>
Image result for harry dean stanton kelly's heroes
Private Willard
     One of the best lines in the film.  His unit is given orders to move out quick smart, to which Willard responds in mock fright "But my hair's still in curlers!"
     He also featured in "Alien", and I hope I'm not spoiling it for you by revealing that he doesn't make it.
Image result for harry dean stanton alien
I think we can guess what happens next, gentle readers ...
Conrad Is Bothered
 - but probably not by what concerns you humans.  We still don't know what the Norks exploded in that tunnel, and with the yield as low as perhaps 60 kilotons, it may quite possibly have merely been a boosted fission device.
     Which has nothing to do with Bookbuyers on Church Street Market in Manchester.  Art?  Stop whining, they'll heal in a couple of weeks!
Image result for bookbuyers church street market
The site in question
     Conrad always pauses to have a nosey and see what's what here, as the books denoted by a black dot on their underside are only £1 each.  Of late, however, the shutters have been down, and your humble scribe is a tad bothered.  Of course my friend the owner can open when he feels like, and does so, meaning he may be taking a holiday.
     Still, Conrad is bothered.

I Beg Your Pardon!
Sorry, I included two questions in a previous blog and only supplied an answer for one of them, I believe.  The questions were from Tuesday night's quiz at the Turk's Head, which is a public house or 'pub' for those of you unfortunate enough not to live in the Allotment of Eden.
     Q:  Which Eighties sci-fi television show featured a robot called "Twiki"?

     The answer, of course, is "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century", and they might well have addded "annoying robot" to be more accurate.  Art?  Put down that Sudofed and work!
Image result for twiki buck rogersImage result for robbie the robot
                       Annoying Robot                                            Awesome Robot

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