Whoops!

I Really Am Very Sorry
It appears that Conrad has gone and done something right, as the traffic at BOOJUM! has increased enormously to what I usually expect from a (wet woeful) Tuesday.  91 hits so far, and that without actually posting anything new yet.  You might compare this to the normal motor vehicle throughput of Much Wenham (Pop. 43.6) out in the sleepy hinterlands of Clackmannshire, 

suddenly experiencing Picadilly Circus* (Pop. 683,000) levels of activity.

     What has caused this?  I have no idea, except perhaps that daft punning title that alluded to the Fussball competition of the moment, Euro 2016.  If so I shall have to mock organised team sports on a regular basis.
     It's genuinely worrying; as you know I slander and libel First Bus and The Metro on an almost daily basis, as well as using photographs that are probably copyright, so if too many people visit here the glad news about my slanderous scrivel is bound to leak out ...
     If I set up a Justgiving page to pay my legal fees, you'll all chip in, right?

BOOJUM! Lambasts Films (Yes, Again!)
As you surely know by now, your humble scribe likes to attack review these misfires things in bunches, rather like victims bananas.  So here we have three films reviewed in the inimitable BOOJUM! style - shallow, impulsive and with poor attitudinal control.  No, wait, that's aircraft.  Poor venom control.  That's it, venom.  With an attitude.
Independence Day: Resurgence:  Pardon the double use of a colon there.  IYRC** (putting both onus and responsibility on the shoulders of you the reader) the original was a C-list film plot with an A+ budget and so I have heard it tellingly described.  It did have the winning combination of Things Exploding and More Things Exploding.  O the plot?  ALIENS INVADE!  HUMAN'S ASS KICKED!  WE FIGHT BACK!  WE LOSE -
     - only joking, had to see if you were paying attention -
     - WE WIN***!
     Not sure what subtle nuanced variations we shall see of Things Exploding.  Expect a lot of popcorn to Get Et.  A LOT.

The "Resurgam" submarine, which is Latin for "I shall rise again"

Gods Of Egypt:  "The battle for eternity has begun" states the tagline.  How long is this film going to be?  Eternity, you know, taking an awful long time, I expect a battle for it to also take aeons.  Conrad is unsure if there's an EU Directive 327501 Edict on Eternity Conflict Delineation, but it there is it will probably define this film as lasting several millenia.  At the least.

The wonderful Sean Hughes as head of Eejit Records, which is close enough

There will now be a short pause as I head to the kitchen to eat my remaindered chicken.

Deadpool:  Oh my, Hollywood, where is your originality?  ANOTHER remake?  And the original Dead Pool barely off the projector sprockets.
     Oh.  On the other hand, this could be an English-language remake of the worst film I've ever seen, "Zombie Lake"^.  "Dead Pool" - do you see what - O you do.  Plus, why on earth is he wearing what can only be politely described as a "gimp suit"?

See?  See what I mean?

Never Underestimate -
Another of these tee-shirt pimping Suggested Posts.  Art?

BAH!

     Gentlemen, whilst I like the Deep Purple of the Gillan-Glover and Coverdale-Hughes era, you are presuming a little too much after the "Never underestimate an old man who listens to Pink Floyd/Led Zeppelin" farrago.
     I would politely suggest that you NEVER UNDERESTIMATE A GRUMPY OLD MAN WITH A HAIR-TRIGGER TEMPER!
     Thank you.  That is all.

Conrad Crosses All Twenty-Four Fingers^^
Whilst dogsitting yesterday I watched the second episode of "Preacher" and DAMN YOU CLIFFHANGER ENDING!
     Er - that's not what I wanted to rant about, although please note the Brits in lead roles.  "Outcast", that's what I wanted to bang on about, although please note the Brits in lead roles.  NO!  Actually I meant to say that it derives from a comic book - like Preacher please note the - by Robert Kirkman, who is also responsible for "The Walking Dead", a television series that has set records and which also started as a comic.
     Hmmm.  "Kirkman" - and Outcast concerns a preacher, who might well be seen as a man of the kirk, which is Scottish for "church".  I guess we'll never know ...
     Jumping metaphorical tracks with the speed of a sloth on Berocca, you should know Conrad by now, with his childish delight in all things superhero.  Well, Robert Kirkman is also responsible for the comic book "Invincible", the first collected volume of which is surprisingly light and frothy for the creator of the two series mentioned above.  Things get darker in later volumes, yet it is all-in-all a delightful Superhero Soap Opera In Space. 
     And?  Well, a man*** can dream, can't he?  Rob, pick up that phone and make the call.  "Powers" did it, and so can you!

Invincible fights off an invasion of Were-Elephants
(Perhaps)

And on that uncharacteristically positive and hopeful note, we shall end for tonight. 
Tot siens!


*  Part of that modern-day Nineveh, London.
** If You Recall Correctly
*** "We"/"man" here of course does not include Conrad, the camouflaged alien spy
^  This is saying a lot.
^^  Alien.  Blessed with more than you lot.