As you should surely know by now, BOOJUM! avoids Politics, Religion and Current Affairs. Except when your humble scribe thinks he can entrap a few more visitors, and then he bangs on about them like Nick Mason channelling Keith Moon. This Intro might come under the heading of Current Affairs because I refer to the Euro 2016 Fussball event taking place as of right now.
"Hang on," I can hear you saying. "Where is the real Conrad and who is this glib shapeshifting substitute?"
Yes, yes, I quite understand, Conrad being averse to sport in all it's forms. Let me be more specific, I am referring to the victory of Iceland over Austria. You might compare this to the victory of Wales over the Ruffians, although the Icelanders in total are only outnumbered 24:1 as against the 100:1 ratio for the latter.
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| Iceland: Idyllic - |
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| - and also terrifying |
Gangi per fel!
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| Four keyboard players and a drummer who plays as if channelling Nick Mason channelling Keith Moon |
This one was a bit trickier to capture as the bus is normally in motion as we pass by, and when it stops at the bus stop, a hoarding blocks the picture. Anyway, Art?
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| Ah. Yes. |
Your humble scribe has no answers, I'm afraid. I think we can admire the quality of the work even if the raison d'etre remains a mystery.
BOOJUM! Reviews Films
Those of a tender nature or who don't like ranting tanting typists can look away now. Conrad, as you should surely know by now, likes to do these reviews in a bundle, as this i) Increases the word count and ii) helps his creative juices run a little stronger*.
"Remainder": Um. No. As you surely know by now, Conrad's diet is at least 50% remaindered food, which reminds me I have some cheeseburgers in the fridge from last week - better scoff 'em tonight before Wonder Wifey bins them.
| - or that fused-together thing from "The Thing" |
"The Forest": Tagline "Where fear grows". I beg to differ.
IT'S WHERE TREES GROW!
There. Sorted. Mind you, if it is where fear grows, thanks for the heads-up and I'll avoid it.
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| Close enough |
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| As interesting as this |
Oh, we're done.
Today's Travel Troubles
Yes, you see Conrad had a deadline - be at the Electric Goldfish Bowl for 8:45 in order to catch transport. Normally not a problem. Today, of course, everything went wrong. The 24 bus fails to turn up AGAIN***, so it's a 409 into Royton. Normally this gets me there to stare despairingly at the 182's receding rear; not today, as so many people had gathered after the 24 didn't turn up again that it was delayed.
Phew! I thought.
Yes, I know I shouldn't tempt fate. We then hit roadworks in Chadderton that were not there last night, nor this evening, and if I were even only slightly more paranoid I'd wonder if they were put there ON PURPOSE SOLELY FOR TODAY! We moved a hundred yards in fifteen minutes.
Despite this, our driver felt that he could not presume on his dignity or calm professional demeanour and certainly couldn't make up for lost time by, y'know, SPEEDING UP.
Can't have any of that! Of course, as the 24 didn't turn up, all those (angry!) passengers catch the 182, so it halts at every single stop.
Now, the notes here say "As I write this we are approaching the A57, where no doubt swarms of cyborg badger-assassins or that errant Promobot IR77 will conspire to thwart progress. Or, possibly, given my sheer good fortune today, a volcano.^"
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| Actually it was cyborg weasels |
* Sorry about that analogy.
** If it were remaindered ham gone grey, I'd eat it, but it's not.
*** This is becoming so common it probably doesn't deserve Upper Case any more
^ Maybe two
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