The Enormous Dwarf

It's All Relative
Also, I can tell what you're thinking: "How can a dwarf be enormous?  Surely -"
     I would refer you to "The Phantom Tollbooth", where our hero Milo encounters a perfectly normal sized man, who claims that he is either "The World's Smallest Giant" or "The World's Tallest Dwarf" - it's all relative.

That's a Watchdog.*

     And so we come to that interesting astronomical phenomenon, the Brown Dwarf, which is a body with at least 13 times the mass of Jupiter, up to an estimated 80 times the mass of Jupiter (usually handily abbreviated to 'MJ' by astronomers).  This means it is just slightly under the limit for generating internal nuclear fusion and becoming a star - a Kim Cardassian as opposed to a David Bowie, if you like.
     I introduced brown dwarfs yesterday, because Phil Plait the Bad Astronomer has an interesting article on a prospective BD in his column.

https://www.syfy.com/syfywire/an-aurora-glows-over-a-possible-rogue-planet

     This is something whizzing about in space beyond the limits of your our Solar System, all on it's lonesome.  It may be a BD, with a planet orbiting around it, or - gasp! - even a planet with a moon orbiting it.  Doubtless time and more, better-refined observations will reveal what it is, and maybe how it got there.     Of course, all the "Planet X" swivel-eyed loons will now jump up and down shrieking "I told you so!" hard enough to make their lithium pills rattle.

An artist had an impression -

     Brown dwarfs.  Proof of the saying "The universe is not only stranger than we can imagine, but so are people."  Or something.     Come on, motley, I told you - the only antidote to an overdose of mugwort is to eat a bucket of raw whelks!

An "Egad!" Moment
This is really bathos in every sense - going from the galactic wonder of a sub-star to that staple of social media - "What I Had To Eat Part 18,5347", with the proviso that, because it's me posting this, you ought to at least pretend an interest.  Art?

"Epoisses"

     I challenge you to tell me what this is - AND NO GOOGLING!  Conrad bought it because it was only 50p (or about 32c in that peculiar South Canadian currency) and he is a miserly glutton.  What was it?  No idea.
     When the box was opened and the secret revealed, it turned out to be a soft cheese, carefully wrapped in airtight plastic -
     This was an "Egad!" moment, as the wrapping promised that this was going to be a spectacularly stinking bit of fromage, meaning I had to wait until Wonder Wifey and her intensely acute sense of smell were out of the house.
     Surprise!  Not only does it barely smell (although I am not 100% sure of this as I only have 1% of a normal Hom. Sap's nasal acuity), it's a nice mild very soft cheese.  Art?

Et voila.

     And because posting pictures of your meals is horribly sad, here's our fall-back to regain a little of our somewhat tarnished credibility - that is, atom-bombing the Moon.

Ha!  TAKE THAT, MOON!

     Hang on - let me just check the Obituaries - ah, it was just a ghastly rumour and Ben Folds is very much alive, it was only a misheard remark about his heart being ignited -**

Remember What I Said Above About People?
Conrad, being the terrible person that we all know him to be, was chortling himself sick over the Have Your Say comments on the Beeb website yesteryon.  Apparently some ballfoot player is injured and out of play for 6 weeks or so, and there was an article about this, together with photos.  The Beeb - wisely or not - opened Comments on the page.  First we need to add a photo they posted.  Art?

Cute dog!

     We shall briefly touch on the ballfoot game here, so don't go to sleep.  Most of the comments were along the lines of "His performance has been so shockingly bad that nobody will notice he's missing", along with a few that said "He likes dogs so he can't be all bad", and the carpers who wondered "How this is news and why did it merit a HYS and what idiots people were for posting on it - oh hang on a minute -"
     However, a significant number of posts, easily in the dozens and dozens, were all along the lines of "OMG TWO PHOTOS THAT ARE EXACTLY THE SAME HOW STRANGE WHAT A WIERDO!!!" 
     Yes indeedy, check out the framed photos.

Thank You, Steve, Thank You SO MUCH!
That was irony, lest it pass you by.  Steve is my memory, you see, and a most annoying character, too, at times.
   Here's the problem.  Art?

Generic Mad Scientist

       I remember a comic strip from an annual which might have been "Eagle" (I think - Steve being lazy again) that had some terrible pun about "FEAR" in the title, because it was set in the "Somethingsomething FEderation for Advanced Research" and it usually had a sinister or spooky theme.  The head scientist had a metal claw for a hand and a weird metal band that covered half his face and all of his nose.  The trouble is, I can't remember the correct title for this strip, nor the mad differently-sane scientist, though I suspect the artist, if not actually Eric Bradbury, was of that ilk.

<sighing> Steve, Steve, what are we going to do with you?

     It might have been "TV21" because, in what is either sad or determined, I've tracked down lists of Eagle strips and artists and comics and not found the story.
     B****y Steve!

Finally - 
Before going on

     
     "OMG! TWO PHOTOS THAT ARE EXACTLY THE SAME HOW STRANGE WHAT A WIERDO!!!"

     I wear my badge with pride.

     Kókuszdió!

* No, really, it's in the book, honest, I didn't make it up.
**  Racy stuff, eh?