You May Not Know This
Because you have a life/don't care/hate Ol' Toly with a passion <delete where applicable> but the name 'Moria' is not merely a typo of 'Moira' but means 'The Black Pit'. One can understand this pejorative description, since the mines are devoid of their dwarven population and lack any illumination. Tripadvisor only gives it half a point, if that helps with your holiday planning. Art!
You see, Conrad was pondering on Friday about where the rest of his hex-and-counter boardgames had gotten to, because there's lots more besides the ones in the hallway cupboard. Where could they be?
Ah yes. My own 'Mine Of Moria'. This is a lower compartment in the fitted cupboards, which is - let Art illustrate my point.
You can barely see the handle. To open it wide enough to gain access is a right faff; first I need to move the paste table covered with wargaming stuff, then my laptop's mobile desk, then the whatsit supporting the television, then the wooden cabinet supporting a teetering CD tower unit.
Well well Eric Bell, not only did I scare away spiders - they ran faster than I did - but I discovered a big box of games, and one stacked on top.
Sorry, no Balrogs. Art!
I remember reading about this game in a magazine, decades ago, and when I tried to order it from a games shop in Gomorrah-on-the-Irwell's Arndale Centre, they discovered the company had gone out of business and it wasn't in stock.
Now, you know Conrad's mind; it greatly resembles a skip. A skip five miles long, two miles wide and three miles deep, where nothing but nothing is ever thrown out. Or The World's Biggest Mental Dumpster, for our trans-Atlantic readers. Several years ago Conrad came across the game being sold at a wargames convention, so long ago I can't remember where or when. So - I bought it! Art?
This is where my Smaug-like attributes come into play. I put the game by and never even opened the box, and it has sat untouched for years. Just for context, the game was published in 1983. One reason the maps and booklets haven't suffered from damp or mould is their use of what looks like a vinyl covering; you can still tell this game is old because the staples in the rule books have gone rusty.
So, for the first time since purchasing it, I opened the box and spread the contents about. Art!
Those maps look as if they were printed yesterday; that's quality material.
Having a scan of the rules, it appears that "Siege" is a large-scale skirmish game, with each move taking only half a minute at most. There are 46 characters, each of whom has two counters, one for them being hale and hearty, and another for them suffering dolorous harm, and the back of these shows them either Stunned or Dead. Art!
The knights (lower starboard) have four counters, for mounted or dismounted. At upper starboard you can see what is called 'chrome' (things beyond generic rules or units), to wit: siege towers, mangonels, trebuchets, mantlets, ballistae and battering rams.
There are seven scenarios in the rules, five of which gradually introduce new rules and units. Scenarios six and seven require pairing this game with it's predecessor, "Cry Havoc". Let's not even go there, I haven't so much as put a single playing piece on the board for "Siege" yet!
Well there we are for this Intro. I had intended to use 'Siege' as a means to an end, thereby introducing a few famous sieges from history, which would have turned this Intro into the whole blog. I will reiterate what the game designers mentioned, that sieges in medieval times were as common as pitched battles, because a castle had to be reduced, by siege or storm or a combination of the two, as leaving them unchallenged in the rear left you vulnerable to counterattack, or your supplies being plundered. Art!
A Little Shameless Promoting
One of the Youtube channels Conrad follows is that of 'Suchomimus', principally because of his short, succinct and accurate analyses of video clips from the Special Idiotic Operation. Sucho's style is to explain what's on screen, then geolocate it, zoom out and geolocate it again, and zoom out and geolocate a third time. Art!
Rather to my surprise, Sucho's primary interest is in paleontology and dinosaurs and he recently posted photos of some dinosaur eggs he'd purchased. He's an expat currently working in Taiwan, occupation unknown, and he usually works in a bit of Nottingham slang into his vlogs. Art!
Egad, gadzooks and also crikey Dick Van Dykey! This is Sucho's new YA novel, available to pre-order now, paperback due out December. He's going to donate pre-order profits to an Ukrainian charity, because he's a highly moral chap, who's already raised lots of money for Ukrainian units seeking vehicles or drones. Art!
It means 'Crocodile Mimic'
BOOJUM! - Ever One To Kick A Chap When He's Down
You will have noticed Conrad's gleeful schadenfreude at how badly "The Marvels" has been doing in both production, post-production and promotion. Today being Saturday, I thought 'Box Office Mojo' might have figures from Friday, or at least from the previews on Thursday. But no. It may be a time difference, because there's no figures up there at all.
No matter! There are plenty of reviewers out there on Youtube who do have access to that information. It's not looking good: $6.6 million for the Thursday previews. Art!
Toby Jones felt a chill in his bones
The much-lambasted Indy 5 made $7 million on it's preview Thursday, which is a very poor showing in case you were unaware. TM making less than that and with a clutch of awful reviews is not what you'd call - Art!
"City In The Sky"
The unpleasant truth is being uncovered by both the dwellers in orbit and those living on terra firma.
Terry’s anger faded into an appalled look.
‘There were over two hundred souls in Forrest! What kind of monster kills two hundred
people!’
Christos looked over the rim of his glasses.
‘Inhuman ones, in the literal sense.
I must say, the Doctor’s hypothesis is becoming more likely by the
hour. You say several sites have been
destroyed?’
Terry nodded. Six that were known
of. There might be isolated sites deep
in the outback whose destruction nobody knew about.
Barclay spoke up.
‘So these aliens, whom I admit now seem more plausible, will kill to
keep their secrets? And we allowed Alex
McMillan to go down with your friend?
That’s putting him at risk.’
Ace stood up for her companion.
‘The Doctor’ll look after him!
He’ll put himself in harm’s way before he risks anyone else.’
Christos heard the fiery riposte from the intense young woman, filing it
away in his memory. He felt a greater
sense of unease than at any time since Doctor John Smith had stood up to
lecture on alien infiltrators living in
Get To Zee Chopper
After a fashion. Art!
This is the gatefold cover for Led Zeppelin's fourth album, imaginatively titled "Led Zeppelin IV", although there's only trees and shrubs to be seen, no ivy at all.
ANYWAY the original black and white photograph has been tracked down by Brian Edwards, a researcher at the University of West England. Art!
The artisan is Lot Long, a thatcher living at Mere, Wiltshire, in a photograph taken in 1894. There was of course much rejoicing about this, but the salient fact that Conrad took away from this BBC item is that the year LZIV was released was 1971. They had done 4 albums by 1971 - now, that's a band with a serious work ethic.
Finally -
Time to go sit downstairs, as Amazon are going to be delivering later this afternoon. Hopefully before darkness falls so I can get another walk in for Ednal, and then - this will be interesting - try to give her a shampoo and wash.
We shall see.
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