All Is Not Well In The House Of Usher Russia
There will be minimal mention of Ukrainian martial matters here, so don't tension twist your thong over it.
First of all, Tsar Poutine had to put up with being treated like a naughty schoolboy at that economic conference in Shanghai, where he did a bit of grovelling and if he had the hair for it, he'd have tugged his forelock. Art!
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| A wild misnomer - Putin ain't just |
There have been petitions from local politicians in Ruffia that the Tiny Toxic Terror Toad resign, which wouldn't happen if they didn't think he was vulnerable. Then, too, the Finance Ministry 'accidentally' leaked the actual figure of Russian deaths so far - 48,000. These 'accidents' do seem to keep happening, hmmm?
Then there is Ruffian state television, which broadcasts only what it's told to broadcast, including this political debate program hosted by Vladimir Solovyov, which usually has very hot debate about current affairs. Some of the guests are so extreme that Vlad has to intervene and argue them down, and he is 110% pro-Putin. This is a screenshot from Jake Broe's blog, where he adds in a Twitter feed from Julia Davis. Art!
Give Julia a virtual hug, she watches these programs so the rest of us don't have to. When the word 'nationalism' is used it's an euphemism for 'Nazism'.
Then we come to the meat of the matter, an internal Ruffian report compiled by Ruffian economic experts, for presentation to Putin and his inner clique. It, too, was leaked, to Bloomberg (economic type chaps). Joe Blogs went through it in detail on his blog and it makes for very gloomy reading. Here's a link if you want to watch it yourself. Be warned, it's 38 minutes long.
I shan't precis the whole thing or we'd be at 12,000 words not 1,200. Art!
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| The ever-cheery Joe |
Joe's vlogs always start with him giving an incredibly cheery and upbeat greeting before describing whatever species of economic hell is going to be expected. He went over the Bloomberg report and picked out key indicators. One of them was that the official Ruffian forecast for 2023 was that the economy will shrink by 0.9%. In The Report the figure given is 11.9%, which would be a contraction of $214 billion. Nothing to make light of.
When it came to 'import substitution' in order to get around sanctions, The Report was blunt about certain items being impossible to source anywhere, with a complete inability to manufacture them in-house. In fact there could end up being a two generation gap between Ruffia and the West in terms of these technologies. Art!
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| Ruffians can't even supply the French fries |
Joe also explained that Ruffia is now a 'Swing state', WASH OUT YOUR FILTHY MINDS! it does not mean what you think it does. No, it means that Ruffia used to be Number One With A Gun, the country you went to first when you wanted supplies of X, Y and Z. Given this farrago in Ukraine, they are now the Supplier Of Last Resort, meaning other nations will only buy Ruffian supplies if they can't be gotten anywhere else, price be Dog Buns'd. Art!
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| Ruffia |
There is more of this, which we may come back to.
The bottom line is that Ruffia is pretty much Kreplach'd economically and although Joe didn't mention it, I shall: when bearing bad news to an autocratic dictator you buff it up as much as possible to avoid being shot, so these figures may be the rose-coloured spectacle version.
Post-Apocalyptic Films As Recommended By The Cultured Vultures
You'll see why when the last one comes up. Art!
Conrad has read the novel that "The Road" is based on, and it's unremittingly bleak, but at the end it amounts to no more than a couple of tramps mucking about in an ashy wilderness. The film is a lot better as it fleshes out the characters and shows you what the aftermath of an apocalypse looks like. The disaster is never identified in the book, which is frankly a cop-out if you ask me. People have speculated about a meteor strike, or nuclear war,
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| "Where is everyone?" (You really don't want to know, mate) |
"Stalker" is an adaptation of the Strugatsky Brother's "Roadside Picnic" and is more of an intellectual journey than a slam-bang action one. Three men travel over the Zone, to a room that is supposed to grant one's most innermost wish. You know, I've always maintained that Hollywood could to a big-budget adaptation of the novel with all the CGI and explosions imaginable. In the meantime we can make do with Tarkovsy's version. Art!
If you haven't worked it out yet, it's set in Russia and the authors of the novel were Russian.
More Seas Of Sand
I realise that above is only a roomful. You have to start small. Back we go to "The Sea Of Sand" where an Italian raiding unit is preparing to attack the British garrison at a Forward Supply Depot.
The radio operator picked up and put on a British steel helmet, getting up to stand on the running board of the car. He turned to cast a look at Sarah, holding a knife up to his lips in a warning gesture.
Don't worry about me, you brute! I can hardly breathe let alone shout a warning, thought Sarah to herself, glaring at the soldier.
"Wotcha!" called the Italian soldier, to someone Sarah couldn't see, as the car came to a halt. His Cockney accent was perfect.
"This is Mersa Martuba, innit mate?" An indistinct voice came from the front of the car, followed by the crunch of footsteps, a gasp of alarm and the sounds of a scuffle. With an agonised intake of breath, the sounds stopped, and the Italian got back into the car, wiping his knife on the front of his blouse.
Dominione pulled the car over to one side, motioning the rest of the convoy forwards, cocking a big signal pistol. Half the convoy passed the command car before before alarmed shouts began to come from the British garrison as they discovered the intruders. Dominione fired a parachute flare into the air, which threw a scuttering, erratic light over the depot, revealing the garrison running around in alarm.
Hmmm well-organised mayhem by the Italians.
Ladies And Gentlemen, A Moment's Silence
Apropos of nothing, let's just pause and reflect on the comic genius of Buster Keaton. Art!
Art!
<sigh but no Tazer> I can see your mistake here. Judge Dredd's nickname (never mentioned in front of him) is "Old Stony Face". Buster's was "The Great Stone Face" as it was part of his comedy persona to never smile on camera. Art! (and get it right this time).
DANGER BUSTER KEATON!
Here he sits on a large piece of moving machinery as it moves around and moves forward. The slightest slip one way and he'd be in pieces. And this is only one of countless dangerous stunts he performed himself.
Finally -
I did query why Aquaman was a member of the JLA, even if he can supply king prawns at cost, and then realised - Of course - obviously! - he can help you cut down on your utility bills by advising on water use.
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