A Pressing Matter

Your Humble Scribe Was Pondering

You might even say musing, as he wondered what to use for today's later Intro, and being singularly uninspired by any of the Muses, the fickle fiends.  Thus, I opened up my copy of 'Brewer's' at random and came across an interesting, if gruesome, entry, which also led to my recollection of a completely different matter, because my mind really is like a skip.  This is also an excuse to bring in the Seventh Doctor.  Art!

"Remembrance Of The Daleks"

     One of the best "Doctor Who" serials ever, even mentioning Bernard Quatermass in passing, and showing how a staircase no longer posed an obstacle to Daleks -

     ANYWAY of course that's not the relevant episode.  Hah!  Did you think we'd move logically and in a linear fashion to the meat of the matter?  Look, if you want logic and linear story-telling then I hate to break it to you, but you're in the wrong place altogether.  Go look up a blog about ballfoot or making biscuits.

     Okay, the entry that I came across in Brewer's was "Peine forte et dure", which is M8 for 'Severe and hard punishment" and you can tell it is going to be both because it dates from the 15th century, when things like human rights didn't exist.  Art!

     This particular punishment was meted out to criminals who refused to plead, by which I assume stating whether they were guilty or innocent - hoping to game the system, chaps, hmmmmm?

     As you can judge from above, the culprit was spread-eagled on the floor, their limbs secured, and a board was placed on their naked body.  A series of weights were then placed on the board - which is where today's title comes from - and the victim by this point probably realised that gaming the system was a verrrrry bad idea.  They either opted for a trial by jury or ended up being flat broke and dead.  Brewer's gives a short list of notable victims, including one Major Strangeways.  This is such an interesting case that I'm not going to go into it here but will expand and expound in future.  Art!

Seriously?  How did they get an anvil on there?

     "Yes, but 'Doctor Who'?" I hear you querulously query.  PATIENCE!  We shall get there.

     Okay, we've gotten there.  Your Humble Scribe felt the tickle of memory when looking at the French phrase.  'Hmmmm Peine Forte.  Peinforte.  Lady Peinforte?"

     Imagine my surprise that the little grey cells had come up trumps.  Art!

As in "Silver Nemesis"

     Don't be fooled by those silken tresses, she's an utter stinker: sorceress, poisoner and power-hungry demagogue.  Probably passes port the wrong way and cheats at cards.  She crossed swords with the Seventh Doctor - actually bow and arrow is more accurate - whilst trying to lay hold of the Silver Nemesis itself, and came to an indeterminate yet probably horrible fate.  O no wait, she gets blown to atoms.  You can call that horrid and it's not remotely indeterminate.

     Conrad is now going to bask in the fact that his memory may not be logical nor linear but it does work.  All thanks to Steve and Oscar!

No, Art.  Just no.

O Dear

You may remember the name of John Bolton, who was a National Security Advisor in the Trump administration, back when Trump really was President and not just in his own head.  Don't worry, this has nothing to do with Politics.  Art!

     He has resurfaced on the South Canadian CBS channel, which is very bad news for Yours Truly.  I shall show you why.  Art!

     Take a good look.  Remind you of anyone?  Art!

Conrad wearing his Happy Face

     Granted my hair is tidier than John's, which won't make a difference on the 22:40 bus home when some drunken plonker begins accusing me of being "That John Wigan - John Blackburn - John BOLTON bloke -"

Talking Of The BBC's Premier Dramamentary Program -

Let us return to "The Sea Of Sand", and our perspective shifts back to Planet Earth again.

Ten: The Sleepers Awake

While The Doctor and his two highly-reluctant companions watched, the dome furthest from them began to emit a grating, squealing racket as the curved surface began to roll back, revealing the interior.

     Rows and rows of glassy black boxes, arrayed in patterns on a flat black floor.  The Doctor counted twenty-seven, wondering what they were.

     This mystery was revealed when the boxes began to slide open, one wall merging seamlessly into the body of each structure.  From the newly-created doorway in each case strode a creature definitely not from planet Earth.

     "Good God!" exclaimed the normally-atheistic Professor Templeman.  Albert gulped in silent, eloquent testimony.  The Doctor looked keenly on, using his telescope.

     The creatures stood about eight feet tall, their torso consisting of a massive pillar that bifurcated into powerful legs, ending in webbed feet.  There didn't appear to be any visible neck, and their arms were long, powerfully-muscled limbs that emerged from the torso at eye level.  Two big, dark eyes sat in the torso, two-thirds of the way up, above a thin, wide slash of a mouth.

     There we go, the aliens have finally turned up.  Happy now?

From The Horrid To The Sublime

Yes, we are back at the picturesque.  Another entry from the BBC's "Countryfile" calendar competition.  Art!

Dinner!

     No!  Sorry, I meant "Follow the leader" by Jack Da Silva.  Not dinner.  "Follow the leader".  One duckling is following another delicious duckling in long grasses.  I don't think there's anything else to add here, bar some lemon juice and a green sa 

Annnnnd Back To The Horrid Again

Yes, we now look at entry 24 on the 'Culture Vultures' list of 25 best post-apocalyptic films, and one I've not heard of before.  Art!

"The Day" 2011

     This is a low-budget Canadian film that the Vultures recommend since it's as bleak as the tundra in winter.  The film follows five survivors, who used to be twelve, as they try to find food, shelter and protection from gangs of roving cannibals.  Civilisation seems to have collapsed, with no good reason given.  It sounds interesting so Conrad may look out for it.

Real-World Horrid

We've not had an update from "The War Illustrated" for some days, so let's remedy that.  Art!

     Here we see Private Stanley Davies availing himself of four-legged transport pilfered from the enemy - you can tell it's ex-Axis thanks to the swastika branded onto it's neck.  Presumably well behind the lines as he's wearing a beret not his helmet.  To starboard you have a Something that British artillery have been working over; it's so badly damaged I have no idea what it originally was.

     In the photograph at bottom you can see a battery of 25-pounders in action, with the gun nearest the camera having just fired - you can tell as the barrel has fully recoiled.  Also note the dust that this firing has kicked up, which will not only get into equipment, but into eyes, mouths and food as well.  August in Sicily explains why so little clothing is being worn; it's extremely hot.

Finally -

Conrad is a bit torn.  I came across an excellent short documentary on Youtube about Steely Dan, a band I have only come to like in recent years.  What's the issue?  I cannot load up any sound files on Blogger, so referencing the doc would be entirely silent.  The best I could do would be to video it on my phone and then upload that, which is a pretty feeble workaround.  Art!

And with that we are done