Which, As You Should Surely Know By Now -
Is Ethiopian for "Damn Dam!". And if anyone concerned in either the design or construction of said civil engineering project was named "Daniel" then we could say "Damn Dam Dan!" which works in English yet not in Ethiopian.
"Goodness gracious!" I hear you quote. "Has that disgraceful old piker been at the cooking sherry again?"
<Short pause as Remote Nuclear Detonator is vigourously applied>
No. No, I have not. Art!
This mighty structure, gentle reader, is the Ethiopian Grand Renaissance Dam, currently being completed across the Blue Nile in Ethiopia. It is an immense engineering project that has taken years to build, intended to provide Ethiopia with hydroelectric power and flood relief. "Relief", however, is not the word on the minds of Egyptians and had I enough time I'd throw a few Egyptian insults for good measure.
For why? A glimpse at a map might be illuminating. Art!
Thanks, Economist
As is plain from this map, the GERD is capable of completely blocking the waters of the Blue Nile flowing downstream, quite besides whatever Sudan decides to do with their Roseires Dam. This is of exceptionally outstanding concern to Egypt, which relies on the Nile waters to provide irrigation for agriculture. Their stance on GERD has moved from pride in a fellow-African nation managing a superlative hydro-engineering project, to abject worry that they're going to be afflicted with drought when their Nile narrows to a trickle three inches across*. What's more, the waters flowing into the GERD's reservoir basin are now arriving faster than the dam can release them, a kind of doomed-to-success state of affairs. Art!
The Blue Nile in Egypt at present
Conrad remembers an old saw from the Nineties which held that the next major war in the Middle East wouldn't be about politics or territory; it would be about water. Well, we may be seeing the preliminary skirmishings right here. Given the sheer size of the GERD, conventional weapons would merely scratch it, so one can imagine a deniable back-channel comms going from Cairo to Tel Aviv, along the lines of "Hey! You know those nuclear weapons you don't possess? We have a one-time scenario where you can test them ..." We have already seen water being used as a weapon in the long dispute between Ukraine and Ruffia over Crimea, with the - but that's another story for a different kitchen.
Having moved from hydrography, history and geography, I think we now need to move to either the nonsensical or the divine. Motley!
Nonsensical it is**
Conrad Unsure Where This One Bubbled Up From
"De profundis" if you like Latin - "From the depths" for we are talking about one of those phrases that bob up in the purulent shallows of Your Humble Scribe's mind. "The Family From One End Street" is the memory, and an unpleasant one it is, too. Waaaaaaaay back in the early Seventies at primary school, we had to listen to our teacher end Friday afternoons with readings from a book, which they decided upon. We the pupils had little input. Conrad was discovering science-fiction at the time and would have recommended works by Heinlein, Norton or Nourse, except weren't you paying attention to the 'little input'?
ANYWAY we had the unmitigated misery of being regaled with the novel above, and if Art can doff his hazmat suit and put down his lunchtime nuclear fuel-rod -
"Adventures". Ho ho.
Their adventures consisted of not doing anything and being extremely slow about it. Conrad remembers that they went to the seaside. That's it. Did they explore the headwaters of the Amazon? Deal with a deadly vaudeville vampire vicar? Fend off an invasion of slime-spitting cyber-slugs? No, no and no. They made sand-castles. Bah!
Back To Bulair
Hmmm okay I exaggerate slightly, since Bulair is at the northern end of the Gallipoli peninsula, whereas the scene of all the action in 1915 was at the southern end. Conrad dug out his "Naval Operations" volumes for the year 1915 and perused quickly, only to see that their chapters on the Gallipoli campaign were split up by other chapters. Still, Volume II did have a set of maps in end-pockets, and one of same - Art!
This is to give some idea of how large the thing is. It has detailed depictions of the Turkish mobile and fixed artillery, which I'd need to take photographs of up close if there's any interest. Conrad unsure if this map's detail is thanks to post-Unpleasantness co-operation with the Turks, or if it was all comprehensively known pre-Unpleasantness.
The other item worth remarking about is that this volume, with all it's maps, is from Paddington Public Library back in 1950, and the maps do not appear to have ever been opened, the poor things. Lucky old me!
Don't worry, we shall be returning to this item. O yes I guess!
Quickly! Let us check that Ben Folds is still hale and hearty and ready to party! Art?
He looks as if Peppi needs to go to work with scissors and razor - but still alive. Phew - disaster narrowly averted!
Now, where were we?
"Dormammu"
Hmmm quite. Another one of those things that pop up in my mind from time to time, even when not stricken with fever. Dormammu is not Romanian for "Dormouse", thanks very much. It refers to an entity in Marvel, who is thoroughly wicked and wanton, beyond redemption, probably cheats at cards, too. Art!
Also, he's never going to make gainful employment in either a petrol station or a bookshop, nor an industrial warehouse - he'd set the sprinkler system off.
ANYWAY he is a dirty cur, from all accounts, who never paid off the late fines on his library books and who swigged the mess port straight from the bottle without a chit. Typically he went up against Doctor Strange, which is lucky for Dormammu, as Iron Man would have used a fire-extinguisher and a fifty-pound sledge-hammer to see to him.
He'd better be all-powerful, because he looks like a gimp
Conrad has not knowingly read anything about this cosmic creep, so the question remains - why did he pop up in the old cerebrum today?
Finally -
This is just overkill, we've already hit the Compositional Ton. I'm not sure what else we can throw into the pot that is short and succinct. WAFER LITHIUM BATTER - hmmm, perhaps not and we'll just leave it at that.
Chin Chin, chaps!
* Even on the brink of Armageddon we here at BOOJUM! insist on using Imperial measurements. No compromise. Rorshach would be proud of us.
** This may, or may not, be the motley. Only time will tell and we don't have enough.
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