Just A River Or Two Will Do
Besides which, I don't want to be a successful world dictator when said world is a glowing cinder, do I? You don't find that many people vying to become ruler of Mordor, either, despite the best efforts of their Tourist Board*.
ANYWAY We are back with Cuyahoga and it's River, which as you ought to remember runs through the South Canadian industrial city of Cleveland. Art!
This is the Cuyahoga in 1967, being turned a rather hellish shade of scarlet. Now, those of us not living in South Canada might think "Yuck!" and quite rightly so. The Clevelanders, however, had a rather different take on things: to them industrial pollution meant all things industrial were booming, lots of $$$ were being made, industry caused pollution so what was the rest of the world's problem?
SO glad you asked! The phrase "O no, the river is on fire!" gives you a clue, as does the phrase "O no, the river is on fire - again!". This, need I add, is not a phrase you expect to hear often, if at all. Art!
Just another day in downtown Cleveland
The statistics are open to question according to whom you refer, but the river had caught alight at least 14 times, conflagrations that ranged from minor nuisances to multiple deaths and property damage in the millions.
Smoke on the water?
The main culprit for all these infernos were petroleum by-products, which were simply pumped into the river. There were other toxic compounds in there as well, which would see off even the hardy riverside rat population. Art!
Extremely unwise! Imagine living life one-handed.
The fire of 1969 (Number Fourteen, in case you weren't keeping track) is now seen as the final wake-up call, after which the fledgling Environmental Protection Agency arrived on the scene and began to legislate against pollution. Since industry in Cleveland had declined in the Sixties, the locals were no longer happy about trading job security for a river of rancid rot. Art!
Cuyahoga today
Swings and roundabouts. All the toxic chemicals are gone, which means that there are lots of micro-organisms such as Clostridium now present, without the chemicals to keep them in check. At least they don't spontaneously ignite.
Right, motley, I've got a drum of Brent Crude here, let's tip it into the swimming pool and see if we can set it alight!
Colour Radio
Bear with me on this one. Okay, Your Humble Scribe was listening to "We Have Ways -" and Ol'Jim was bruiting about an artwork he'd been gifted by Keith Burns
NO! No, Art, no.
- whom is an artist Jim had been working with on Ladybird books AND NOTHING TO DO WITH THE CUYAHOGA FIRES OKAY ART.
Art by Keith
From what I can see, and from what Jim said, Keith has done lots of work for comics, especially "Johnny Red" and seems to specialise in aviation art, which is apt enough for Johnny as he flies a red aeroplane**. Recall, if you will, that artist who did all the box art for Airfix kits, lots of which were for aircraft; a niche market perhaps, yet there's always a market for it. Art!
Keith probably autographing; you can't tell me he did all that with one pen
ANYWAY back to that gifted artwork - Jim had asked for British soldiers of the Second Unpleasantness in action, the only stipulation that IT MUST HAVE A P.I.A.T.! You know, that uniquely British military offspring of a drainpipe and a spring-loaded spike. Art!
Projector, Infantry, Anti-Tank
The reason I put that up is because - obviously! - none of the listeners could see what the drawing was, although Jim and Al were concerned with the helmets depicted, thinking they looked too much like Teuton Fallschirmjager helmets and not the traditional British Brodie-pattern helmet. Hmmmm. Art!
That's one of the British helmets in limited use from (I think) late 1944 and it definitely doesn't look like a Brodie. There's also the British paratrooper helmet. Art!
This is all moot until or unless we ever get to see the picture itself. I have just Tweeted WHWOMYT to ask if it can be put up on display. We shall see.
Let's Have Another Contender For Astronomy Picture Of The Year
I know what you're thinking: 'The elderly dotard seeks to avoid creating new content by relying on the input of others', to which I would reply "Exactly!" because anything that takes the heavy lifting out of the ceaseless search for creativity is welcome. Besides, it's not as if you have to pay to read this. Art!
This one is an aurora over the Ruffian city of Murmansk, caused by charged particles from the Sun reacting with the magnetosphere, usually only visible in the higher Northern latitudes. Murmansk itself is above the Arctic Circle, thus a prime contender for aurorae. Art!
Original photograph by Vitaly Novikov. Conrad can't help thinking it looks like the Ruffian equivalent of the Bat Sign. "Commissioner Valenkov? We've put up the Super Slav Sign. All we can do now is wait." "And pray. We're allowed to do that now. Curse whoever is stealing our ships!***"
Doing A Bit More Cheating
Back to that quiz put up by "The View From The Turret" which will have had answers posted by now. Conrad, however, ever one to be perverse, is jolly well going to look them up himself, so Hah!
Q4) Whom did Alfred the Great defeat at the Battle of Etheldun?
A) Well, if Ethel were dun, I'd guess - Ethel? Rather a stab in the dark. Go on, then.
O it was "Ethandun". And Alf crushed the Great Heathen Army. Art!
A photograph probably not taken in 878 AD
Q5) What was the destiny of Swedish tanks from 1937 and 1938?
A) Er - to be used as offshore seed point for coral reefs?
Ah, it seems they were only used for training. Art!
Finally -
Conrad generated a few brownie points and 2,000 steps by taking Edna for a trot, since the rains are holding off at present. It looks as if the deluge may start any second now, which had the added value of 1) not happening and 2) keeping other dog-walkers indoors.
And with that we are definitely done!
* Widely acknowledged as one of the hardest jobs going
** Hurricane? Spitfire? Lagg 3? Conrad unsure.
*** If this ever makes it to television I want royalties.
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