Ah, Yes - Latin
Let me get my retaliation in first, because I learned that from Judge Dredd. ART!
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| This will make sense later. Honest. |
You ought to know by now that BOOJUM! has an ambivalent attitude towards what we frequently denigrate as a "zombie language" - hang on - a thought occurs - have there been any films or television programs or works of literature set in Roman times where a garrison of beleaguered centurions face off a zombie horde? I have no idea, and shall have to go consult The Oracle (a.k.a. Degsy) about this -
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| Hmmmmm I think other people have both asked and answered this question |
ANYWAY apologies for the diversion, I had no idea we were headed down that particular rabbit-hole.
Latin! And today's title is an old one from Juvenal, the Roman satirist, which can be translated in a few ways. The one we're going to adopt today is "Who watches the watchmen?" because this evokes a certain graphic novel (and film, as you may already be aware). The concept is that of well, okay, you have these people in positions of high regard in terms of civilisation overwatch - who does the overwatch on them?
I beg your pardon for another rabbit-hole diversion, but since we've already mentioned Judge Dredd, allow Conrad to mention that the culture he's a part of had an answer for this. Who judges the Judges*? Art!
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| The SJS! (I think artwork by Jim Baikie) |
Here we see the sinister Special Judicial Squad as they force entry into a Judge's apartment to conduct who knows what kind of duggery; note the skull emblem on their helmet and reversed eagle on the shoulder, and that they display none of the tender loving charm that Judge Dredd does, and he doesn't have any in the first place.
ANYWAY (again) we come back to that slogan and the underlying concept and grubby 21st century politics. I bet Captain Scarlet never imagined he'd need to deal with a red tape 1,257 miles in length to investigate a Mysteron thre
ANYWAY <sighs> I have been listening to a podcast which calls itself "The New Abnormal" and they were dealing with indictments against a person we shall coyly dub "Roodeegee", who is a South Canadian lawyer, or attorney if you want to be posh. He served as the attorney to a Very Self-Important Person, who held the highest political position in South Canada**. Legal issues like this always involve Latin, as in "pro bono" or "sui generis" or even "adsum jam forte".
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| As rebuilt after British arsonists had their way |
Roodeegee is currently in very, very hot judicial waters, which in fact might have turned to superheated steam, thanks to a search warrant served upon him and his property. TNA pundits explained that, he being an attorney, the South Canadian Department of Justice would be extremely reluctant to ratify a search warrant. Why so? I thought you'd never ask!
1) It might lead to extensive attorney-client privilege conflict. In South Canada what an attorney and their client discuss is legally protected, and nobody can poke or pry into what went on. Thus, if Roodeegee's client was discussing world domination via an extra-solar starship invasion fleet, that could not be divulged to UNIT or Spectrum. As an example. Theoretically.
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| "Waiting for the other shoe to drop***" |
2) The adversarial legal system inherited from Perfidious Albion is respected, meaning that the cut-and-thrust of legal debate on the court-house floor takes precedence, rather than an extra-judicial request to go poking and prying around people's swanky New York apartments.
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| An anonymous city somewhere |
3) In order for a search warrant against a lawyer to be executed <sorry if that word sounds a bit sinister> there has to be very high level legal permission sought and granted. This was done with absolutely no kickback or delay. If the Cthulhu-level legal entities in New York allowed this search, then they must have been given positively Lovecraftian levels of evidence.
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| Rarely invoked to provide a deposition |
This all interacts to suggest that Roodeegee has an epic legal battle on his hands BEFORE any of the search warrant results come out. Conrad pretty sure he would not like to be him. Legal battles like this can take months to resolve, so don't expect quick results.
Getting High With Coke
WASH OUT YOUR DIRTY MINDS!
I refer, of course - OBVIOUSLY! - to a Darwin Award Honourable Mention, and a workshop owner who discovered that a Coke can would fit down an exhaust pipe he was working on. If he wrapped the can in an oiled rag it made a better seal between can and pipe, which is what you want when you've welded a plate across the bottom of the exhaust pipe, drilled a side hole in it and then added oxygen and acetylene. Art!
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| What he was aiming for |
The first two experiments worked, if with a little less Ooomph than our protagonist wanted. His third trial blew the exhaust muzzle apart, deafened him completely on a temporary basis and partially on a permanent basis, either blew the Coke can apart or threw it so far it was never found, and also caused an emergency at the store next door, which was a garage with a 20,000 gallon propane gas tank on their premises. There were fire engines, and police - whose sirens he didn't hear thanks to the temporary deafness.
What's In A Name?
Yes yes yes five letters. Conrad is quite proud of recalling this one, as he was stood at the Morrison's checkout, scribbling "Fallingbostel" on the paper wrapping of a piece of remaindered ham, thinking "What was that name?"
I had remembered a person's name, which, if you processed it the way Conrad's mind processes things, meant they were no longer a superhero but were instead a villain. Art!
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| DAREDEVIL |
Hmmmm. Yes, well, what if we've been reading that name all wrong? It's Victoria Wood's "Spudoolikay" observation all over again. What if it's NOT "Daredevil" but instead <shudders and necks a tot of rum> "Da Red Evil"?' and he's in fact a Communist trying to destroy South Canada from within?
Yeah, I thought that would shake you up, as much as it shook us up here.
Finally -
Sorry if you were expecting commentary and asides on "Farscape" Season one, because I've got that on DVD and it's not going away. Season Five of "The Expanse" is on a timer and I need to watch before it expires, so you may get comments on that before the exploits of John Crichton. It is interesting to see how far special effects have marched onwards in the intervening decades. Art
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There you go, a completely accurate and unbiased comparison.
Chin chin!
* 22nd century law officers given absolute authority to deliver instant, and frequently lethal, justice on the crime-ridden streets of Mega-City One.
** This was not the Secretary Of The Interior. Just to be clear.
*** No Cheshire cats were smirked in the creation of this photograph
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