First of all, let me apologise to the Nork's Marinenjaegerkommandoen, because I didn't mention them when lauding their brothers (and sisters) for keeping our North Sea oil rigs safe <hangs head in shame>. You won't have heard of the MJK,as, unlike more famous special forces (which is an oxymoron if ever there was one), the Norwegian government denied that they existed until a few years past. "O those chaps armed to the teeth wearing face-obscuring masks and with no identifying uniform symbols? Totally a figment of your imagination." Yes, until they win a Presidential Unit Citation.
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| Happy dancing Norwegians* |
ANYWAY let me cattle-prod Art into attentiveness, because Anthony Vickers Booksellers are really on the ball. Your Humble Scribe ordered from them on Friday and on Saturday morning, alongside a tremendous shipment of drugs, we get the following:
This is, admittedly, a bit of a niche subject. Your Humble Scribe was compelled to purchase thanks to various mentions on The Great War forum, and it does exactly what it says on the cover. "1914" is a misnomer as no permanent concrete fortifications were essayed by Perfidious Albion until early 1915. What's that? You want an example? I thought you'd never ask! Art?
Yes, it looks like a barn. However, if you read the text then you understand that there is an enormously strong reinforced concrete bunker inside it. This was a trick the Teutons had learned a couple of years earlier; an innocent farm building? Yes but with a concrete bunker sporting walls three feet thick inside it.
Okay, so we've got Armageddon sorted, right?
Hmmmm well, partly, for there is more to come.
Motley, fancy a day trip to Meggido?
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| Armageddeon = Meggido |
Extra-Solar Armageddon
I split these two topics because otherwise you'd be reading about Norway, the Holy Land and T.A.R.D.I.S, which can be a tad distracting. Okay, let us cast our mind back to 1965, when Aaru Productions made a film they called "Doctor Who And The Daleks", based on the television series. Unlike the television series, they were able to film in colour, and they had a budget beyond twelve pounds, three shillings and sixpence**. Art!
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| Salute a great British gentleman, you pikers! |
Because these were filmed, rather than televised, the crew could use matte effects, which is where part of the screen is blocked off with a painting, leaving a small section to display the filmed part. It was a standard technique for decades, until CGI came in as a substitute. Art!
I think this shot might have graced the blog once before. That moon in the background is most likely a matte shot, and a really well done one, too. Then we have the second-string team, who wanted to get finished at 17:00 on the dot so they could get down the pub and watch Melchester Rovers versus Lesser Sneddlepool on "Match Of The Day". Art!
Hmmmmmmm. If you ignore those ghostly reflections on the screen, then it's not apparent how high our heroes (and heroine) have had to climb, because the whole route is not being shown. Nor is that mountain and swamp background especially convincing, although it's only on-screen for a few seconds each time. 3/10 Must Try Harder is Conrad's conclusion.
O - the "Armaggedon" connection? These scenes are set on Skaro, where the Thals and Kaleds waged a short (very short - 13 minutes and 24 seconds at last count***) war that completely blitzed the planet's surface, and most of the population, too.
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| "This isn't Blackpool!" |
Bitten By The Coincidence Hydra AGAIN
Once more my nethers are gnashed. Although this does confirm Your Humble Scribe's assertions about language, so being unable to lie down for a day or two is well worth bearing.
Okay, yesteryon I was complaining about how a Codeword worked in the obsolete, archaic and unused word "Espy", and you can go back and check if you like. "Forsooth, and bejabers -" I vented.
Yes, well, carrying on with "Le Mort D'Arthur" only a couple of hours later, what do we espy see? Art!
Yes yes yes, that is the dread word "Espy" in there. HOWEVER we are talking about a work from 1471 AD. I rest my case, Your Honour.
If you have to know, Sir Launcelot De Lake had pre-positioned a mole in the enemy camp, who would report back to Sir LDL if Queen Guenevere was at risk of becoming an human rotisserie. And she was.
You What?
Conrad uses this title to post bewildering stuff he has no grasp of, because the modern world can be confusing to an elderly man who grew up when the UK had no dedicated firearms units (except perhaps in the Met). Yesteryon having been Saint Valentine's Day, let us now look at a bizarre advert concerning same. Art!
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| STILL waiting |
Yes, welllllll. A young lady and a ten-stone plastic and metal calculator, that she would need to carry around in a shopping trolley? I say ten stone (one hundred and forty pounds mass) as a guess, because if that plastic's high density, we could be talking two hundred pounds.
I think the thing to take away from this is that there are far, far better duos out there than this farrago.
Finally -
Conrad is minded of that old 2000AD story, "Armoured Gideon", which concerned a giant robot that "Trod the space between moments" or some such shizzle (it was a long time ago) in pursuit of supernatural miscreants. Art!
Not a chap you want to either cross or encounter in a dark alley.
Conrad is especially pleased with himself about remembering this series, as it only saw the light of day 30 years ago, at which point Shelli was only a few feet tall and had absolutely no realisation that our paths would cross decades later. Nor that said encounter would involve cake. Which I have not baked for Lo! these many months. Lockdown you have a lot to answer for.
And now, Vulnavia, we set our sights on the stars!
(which is code for 'we are done')
* As happy as Norks can get, which is not a lot.
** Pre-decimal, you see. It used to be called "LSD" - which is another story.
*** I completely made this up. So sue me.
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