Sorry if you expected a blow-by-blow account of a trans-Atlantic flight on Virgin. Even if I had done that the description would be a bit flat: "Got on plane. Flew. Got off plane." Conrad not one for social fripperies, you know.
Anyway, what follows has very little to do with real air travel, so if the ramblings of a man full of laudanum and gin are not of interest, do feel free to carry on to the next post.
One of the consequences of being ill, tired and required to get up early in the morning is a worry about getting to sleep. This, of course - of course! - creates a vicious circle where the fear of not getting to sleep creates an inability to get to sleep.
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| Tyler Durden, I'm your man |
This is what dreams are for. Yes yes yes, you could shotgun a four-pack of Tennents Super and then you'd most certainly sleep, either that of the dead or with the fishes in fact (Tennents Super at 9% not being stuff to muck about with). Yet think of your liver*!
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| What dreams may come, eh? |
Not straight home. O no! the mind of Conrad appears to never switch off, even when asleep. Straight home would be boring. BORING!
So, we landed in Spain and caught a small two-engined jet to France, which is when we must have been at least a generation into the future, as the jet underwent a significant yet very matter-of-fact morphing into a vehicle expressly designed to land and taxi to the terminus. None of the passengers or crew batted an eyelid at this transformation, so it must have been pretty mature, widespread technology by this time. The same thing happened when we landed in the Pond**.
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| Apparently this is a real aircraft that really morphs. Who knew! |
Well, after a whistle-stop tour of what my mind gets up to whilst I'm not looking, I will present a few answers.
No! Not to life and the eternal mysteries of human existence; to the Pub Quiz questions I put up yesterday, with no answers. Hopefully it added a certain frisson to your daily lives.
The Answers
The reason the numbers are out of sequence is because this is the order Janet the Quizmistress reads them out in. Hey, it makes sense to me.
The Questions
10) Which London residence did the Queen Mother live in?
3) Who was the first presenter of "Mastermind"?
14) This was a tricky one and concerns a foodstuff: first you throw away the outside, then you cook the inside, then you eat the outside and discard the inside.
8) The Rabbit is seen as a fertility symbol in some cultures. True or false?
The Answers
10) Clarence House. Tom smacked himself on the head as he actually knew this.
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| Clarence Ho. |
3) Magnus Magnusson. I had to help here with the clue "One name twice".
14) Corn on the cob. I doubt anyone got this.
8) True.
Proof That Some People Have Entirely Too Much Time On Their Hands
Not so much the pot calling the kettle black - for we of the current day are wont to wash our kitchen impedimenta and do not heat them over an open fire in an inglenook fireplace any longer, thanks to electricity - and perhaps more like the toaster calling the microwave a device for treating food by radiation.
I refer, of course, to "Jim'll Paint It", that splendid refuge from the straitjacket of sanity, and the latest one is hilarious, in a particularly gruesome way. Art?
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| I don't want to embiggen too much for the squeamish out there |
Well, it made me laugh ...
Finally -
For all out there who feel the need for a little vicarious TLC, you may app - No! It means "Tender Loving Care" not "Textile Laundry Cleaner" - you may appreciate the next picture, which seems a good one to go out with. Art?
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| That's a hug, not a throttle! |
* And wallet
** The Pond of Eden, i.e. Britain, not a literal pond.
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