Had I A Gaster, It Would Be Flabbed

I Know What You're Thinking -
 - and once again I must re-iterate that telepathy is still a distant gleam in the eyes of the planning team at DARPA.  No, I know what you're thinking because you're predictably critical of your modest artisan:
     "Oooh look, Conrad is in late and thus has recourse to stealing lines from "Jabberwocky" by Lewis Carroll, who also wrote "The Hunting of the Snark", from which the word Boojum is derived."
     Well put, and I like that you used "recourse" and "derived"* in there, as well as the entirely correct derivation for BOOJUM! except - how can I put this? - you're WRONG!
     If you hail from those sad lands that are not the Pond of Eden**, that is non-British, then I will allow you a measure of gaping incomprehension at this point.  Okay, okay, you can close your mouth now.
     The colloquial word "flabbergasted" in English means "To be verily amazed, if not stunned" by circumstances or events.

Flabbergastedog

     No, I'm not going to apologise for taking hundreds of words to explain one.  My notes for tonight are a bit sketchy and I need all the verbal padding I can get.
     Oh, and why am I flabbergasted?  High blog traffic before I post anything novel.  Truly, the ways of the BOOJUM! reader are hard to understand.

Before And After -
 - or, a cakey-bakey non-disaster.  Gentle hints had been dropped by Wonder Wifey about how there were old bananas that needed putting out of their misery, and - gosh what a coincidence! - banana bread would be such a convenient way of doing so.
     Thus we have:

Before.  Frankly it does not look appetising!

After.  Try cutting a slice and Wonder Wifey will have your arm off ...

     Gluten-free but full of chopped nuts, still it does count towards one of your five a day, right?

FILM REVIEWS

If you so desire, you can skip this next bit, as you know Conrad and film reviews for BOOJUM! - like a fever dream or Lewis Carroll, they bear little resemblance to reality.

Triple 9:  SO obviously a rebrand for the UK market, as it's a South Canadian film doubtless called "911" across the pond when it was released there last year.  Not a very informative title, either.  Police?  Ambulance?  Fire Brigade? Coast Guard? Mine Rescue?  Mountain Rescue?  Hot Fat Spillage Critical Catering Crew?

Trumbo:  SO obviously a grimly cheerful primary-coloured unwanted sequel to that Disney classic of yesteryear, all about the exploits of that magic feather, no doubt.  

Goosebumps:  Actually the correct term is "horripilation", which is how Conrad views and feels all those dreadful shows that consist of video clips of people suffering terrible accidents to the accompaniment of sneering, sniggering commentary, written by the witless for the woeful -

     - sorry, where was I?  Just to state that if it doesn't have undead radioactive cannibal psychos ON THE MOON, then it won't scare me.

This has promise, though -

There you go, film reviews over, you can come out from behind the cushion now.

Today's Coincidence - Part One

As you surely know by now, since I have trumpeted it far and wide at considerable volume, your gifted author is currently working his way through Thucydides' "History of the Peloponnesian War".

     Not five pages into "The Millionaires Unit" about South Canadian playboy pilots of the First Unpleasantness, who and what gets mentioned?

     No, not "Ravisher in Ruffles" from Mills and Boon!  Thucydides and his book, that's whom.

     What, you (and Harry Hill) ask, are the chances of that happening?

Today's Coincidence - Part Two

Who is the adult lead in "Goosebumps"?  Why none other than Jack Black.

     Perusing The Metro - did the Cryptic Crossword in 35 minutes today people - who crops up in "60 Seconds"?

     No!  Not Eugene Levy - excellent comic turn in "Splash" by the way - Jack Black!

     Conrad has a lot of time for Jack.  He's one half of Tenacious D, together with Kyle Gass.  Neither of them look like rock star material, you might say, in which case you'd be nursing your jaw and carrying several teeth home in your pocket.  Rock is not about looks!  Plus, I've seen Jack and Kyle working on music together, and Jack makes the very accurate observation that you can sit down for an afternoon and work on music for six hours together, yet generate only three minutes of usable stuff.

     None of which has anything to do with Goosebumps or coincidence, I grant you, but - once again! - whose blog is it?

Thumbs Up For Colin

Conrad, as he is almost proud of boasting, cannot draw a straight line with a ruler.  Whilst he is a buzzing spelling Bee, a grammar pedant of the first water, and able to throw the English language around with a fair degree of dexterity, his ability with paint or brush is akin to that of a blindfolded rhino - bad with chiaroscuro and liable to knock the easel over.

     So!  Let me illustrate one of Colin's illustrations:

Done with oils

     Like any artist with talent Colin is full of self-doubt, so to see him rate this rather corking picture is a nice change.

Enough for tonight, I feel.  How many words have we acquired? Oooh, over 900.


*  You can't take any credit, it's all due to my influence.
** It's so wet outside that my SAS eavesdroppers have been replaced by the SBS.  Go look it up.