As you already know by now, your humble scribe is ever one for a bit of punnery, but this one - this one will take a bit of explaining and working out. Still hilarious, though*.
Okay, we occasionally take a look at the lesser-known special forces of other countries here at BOOJUM! - Conrad just loves the way "Marinenjaegercommando" rolls off the tongue with a Norwegian accent - and those of Poland are informally known as "Grom", which is Polish for "Thunder".
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| Some chaps from Warsaw - er - on tour |
Now, why am I blathering on about a bunch of Poles who have been knocking around in support of NATO operations since Kosovo?
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| Two white vans! |
Edna Wunderhund
Of course every dog owner is convinced that their particular canine is The Most Wonderful Dog In The World. The fools! Conrad, obviously - obviously! - has an impartial perspective on Edna as she is not "Our" dog, still less "my" dog, because she is entirely the responsibility of Wonder Wifey. She is disturbingly quick on the uptake with a good memory: ask her to get the octopus out of the toy basket and she won't come back with the elephant.
Art? Picture credit, please.
There she is in an unusually tranquil moment, gnawing away at her Christmas chew toy/tuggin bone, which will be destroyed by the end of this month at current erosion rates.
Her latest game is being taken out of the lounge, then being let back in to find the hidden balls, which she loves to bits, all the more as there's a treat for every ball found.
As I have had cause to say before, thank the Lord aloft she doesn't have fingers and thumbs or all you humans would be redundant.
The Haul
Off on a trip to B & M and then Aldi this afternoon, as your gifted author needed a new diary today. His old one expires at midnight, you see, and, being a dinosaur, I need to write things down in black ink on white paper, or else they don't exist.
Sugar I could get at B & M; for lemons I needed to squeeze through the crush in Aldi, which is appropriate as I shall be making lemonade with them.
As I know you are all hard-nosed skeptics who need proof, I shall provide:
Yes, a bit more than lemons and sugar, I admit. The dates were only 40p per pack, and you must admit a man** who likes his dried fruit really can't miss out on that, can he?
Now, About That Notebook -
I'm probably lecturing the utterly unfamiliar here, as Young People*** nowadays are all busy tapping away on their mobile phones, which will surely thin the herd out a bit if they continue to do this whilst crossing the road.
Anyway, to a dinosaur like Conrad, it matters enough about his thoughts to write them down on paper, with a pen. Art?
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| NO! Where's my tazer - |
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| "Conrad took his finger off the trigger -" |
The format also matters. I've been using a huge notepad that is rather awkward to write upon in the confines of a bus, so today I got a more compact one. Swings and roundabouts, this one has hard covers, so one cannot contort it into shape and carry on when a curious co-passenger sits down next to you. Art - and get it right this time -
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| "Dear Diary -" |
Oh dear. At the word limit and I had to much more to tell tales about. Maybe later^^.
* Yes it IS!
** "Man" for purposes of brevity rather than accuracy
*** To be pronounced a tad contemptuously
^ Tee hee!
^^ Definitely later!
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