Exile On The Main Street

Or, Genius Loci
If you have been following this blog with any degree of attention, or not,* then  you ought to be aware that your humble scribe (that's me, for the easily confused) works in the city centre of Gomorrah-on-the-Irwell.  Which other folks are pleased to call 'Manchester'.  My name is more descriptive and accurate, however.
     A consequences of having to get to work for early in the ante meridian is that one has a vision of The Night Before, when  all the gay revellers were out, revelling.  Seen in the cold harsh light of dawn, their revenant puddles of chips/vomit/kebabs are considerably less appealing than they would have seemed six hours earlier.
     "Wow, the old fart is on a downer today, isn't he?" I hear you disrespectfully comment.  Pausing only to note your ISP so that they can be fed a virus later, allow me to post a photograph.  Art?

     This is the somewhat grim prospect facing Conrad on his amble/skate/swim to work today; cold, dark, wet and - the only positive thing - no longer icy.  In a few hours time this street will be home to hundreds of scurrying feet, whereas now your humble scribe is the only sign of life, which is where today's title comes in: I do feel like an exile.
     Oh - just to be clear - all those scurrying feet will come attached to their parent bodies; I wouldn't like you to go away with an impression of Gomorrah-on-the-Irwell as being over-run by zombie myths, which are the same as zombie leg ends.
     What's that?  Today's blog title is suspiciously similar to that of an album title by those Zombies Of Rock, the Rolling Stones?  Pshaw!  If this is true - which I doubt - then it is merely an amazing coincidence, another in that long line of them of late.
     Now, let us heat up a pan of lard and pour it all over the motley!**

"Spirit of Place"
I do beg your pardon - I've gone and committed a sin that I find inexcusable in others - quoting in a foreign language without also posting a translation.  "Genius Loci" is Latin for "Spirit of place" and refers to a concept held by the Romans, that there was a particular spirit that inhabited your home and hearth.  I think we can prod Art awake with a pitchfork and provide an illustration -

Hmmm.  That would explain a lot ...

     - of The Mansion's particular genius loci.
     BOOJUM! - educating and entertaining you simultaneously.

Attack Of The Killer Turkey...
Yes!  We are back to "The Giant Claw", which is perhaps a little unsporting of Conrad, given that it is such an easy target.  For one thing, it's as big as a battleship -
     Anyway, kindly gaze in awe upon the - er - villain of the piece.  Art?

This turkey not voting for Christmas ...

     Quite.  Anyway, what brought this cinematic ordure up was a film that Darling Daughter mentioned last night, "Thankskiller", which features - and you're probably waaay ahead of me here - a killer turkey.  Which kills people over in South Canada at Thanksgiving.  It is, according to DD, who is not an overly-fussy viewer, "dreadful".  Not only are the effects at the level of a hand in a sock pretending to be the turkey, talking, but the dialogue is dire, too.  Let me poke Art with a vegetable peeler -

Stan Kubrick eat your heart out!

     Now, given that I am typing this at work, where they rather jib at their minions perusing IMDB in company time, I dare not look up many stats for this <ahem> turkey.  However, Wiki does state that the first one cost only $3,500.  AND THEY ARE UP TO THE SECOND SEQUEL!
     If this is true, then there is something wrong with the world.

There Is Something Wrong With The World
Yes, but we knew that already.  Okay, cast your mind back to Halloween of this year, and that faintly amusing South Canadian comedy show, 'Saturday Night Live'.  They had a sketch of awesome weirdness about "David S. Pumpkins", featuring that very same character as played by Thomas Hanks.  Art?  Less coal more goal!

World, you are one sick puppy

     Any questions?  Well, apart from what the heck is going on here?*** 
     DSP was a brief internet sensation.  Or so I thought, because he has returned in an animation iteration, for children of the nation.  Art?

A SICK, sick puppy

     FOR KIDS?  What madness is this?

     Later.


*  Caution!  "Not" is bad for your health!
**  What's the melting-point of lard?  Ah - enough to cause second-degree burns.  Sorry, motley!
***  South Canadian comedy.  I feel they miss the Empire's sense of humour.