It's A Dog's Life. Fortunately

For The Dog, That Is
Yes, I am referring to that little scamp Edna, who is experiencing her last day under the tender solo care of your humble scribe.  Wonder Wifey and That Other Guy - what is his name*? - are due back from a sunny sojourn abroad in the small hours of Tuesday morning, meaning that your modest artisan will no longer be condemned to haunt the house at the whim of a small furry canine.  
     Mixed blessings: Conrad, who has no scruples and an excuse instead of a conscience, has noticed that blog traffic has been higher of late whilst he is promoting Edna and his selfless patronage of same.  Will this persist when all he can present in photographs is his grinning, satanic maw?
     Probably not.

Definitely not

     In other domestic news, the Mudermobile has now been retro-fitted with the nuclear howitzer and 30 mm chain guns - couldn't send it off to the garage mounting those! - and put to serious domestic usage by doing the weekly shop.
     I know, this is not what you signed on for when reading BOOJUM!  You expected atomic foofoodillies, blather about films and perhaps a rant about deep  sea exploration.
     Not shopping.
     Bear with me!  Conrad can make even a pint of milk seem entertaining and dangerous.
     Firstly, doing the shopping means leaving Edna on her own.  So we divert her with the Brick -

The Brick - it am jam with ham

     This is guaranteed to divert her for a few minutes.
     I did mention about having the car back, which is when one appreciates the convenience of having a car rather than having to haul supplies on the bus.  Art?

Minus the ice cream of course.  That went straight into the freezer.

     This is about four times the amount your modest artisan can manage on a single bus ride, and took merely an hour, whereas on the bus it would take at least four.  Or, given that it's First Bus, nineteen and a half days.
     The "dangerous" part came courtesy of the flocks of doddering pensioners infesting the aisles of Morrisons, who managed to skillfully block access, get in the way, dawdle and otherwise prevaricate - you really don't need to study a jar of jam for ninety seconds to decide if you want it, madame - making your talented typist grateful that he was on leave and not a schedule.  Edna, if she only knew, would have been less forgiving.
     There's no photos of the morning walk for Edna, as it was cold, wet, windy and raining, so I concentrated on getting back to the Mansion on the double.  Sorry about that!  And I'm not venturing out at present whilst it's bucketing down.  Sorry about that as well**!

Films And Television
Since my sources of inspiration have been a bit trammelled of late, I'm trying not to pad out the posts with too much film and television, as repetition makes for a bored audience.

  ATOMIC DEATH WEASELS!!!  

     Just testing.  So, here goes:
     "Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows".  Not a Game of Thrones?  Game of Thrones seems to be all the rage today. Hang on, how old is this film?  2011?  Why is it still on the side of a bus on a poster, then?  Robert Downey (Jr.) is committed to Iron Man and has been for years, yes, so - who's trying to confuse me here?  Who GoT what?

221B Baker Street - Sherlock's Home

     "Uncharted": There are gaps in maps?  Still?  Who knew.  "Here be dragons" used to be the phrase (which sounds very GoT) and I suppose they ate all the cartographers which is why this is -

It's "Maps" backwards.
Maps, you know, being kind of dull

     "Person of Interest": As you surely know by now, Conrad has been watching this series and just finished watching Series 4, which he luckily came to late, as it actually finished last May.  "Egad!" I hear you call, "Imagine that, having to wait!" and wait a year, as it's not due back until May 2016.  So, only a week to go!
     As for "Z Nation", that's going to start filming soon for a September release. O well, only 5 months to go.

Ambrose Bierce.  An Interesting Person

A Mills Bomb
Yes, yes, I can tell what you're thinking - "O that Conrad!  Banging on about the First Unpleasantness again, and the Grenadier Guards and their Pattern 36 hand grenades better known as -"
     WRONG!
     "A Mills Bomb" is what the unfortunate recipient of an hour-long rant from Pat Mills (2000AD editor) called it, usually via a telephone handset held at arm's length.  When Pat was angry you knew about it.

Pat counting to two (I think)

     

* Degsy, lest you think the joke has gone far enough
** But not very much