Conrad - Not Too Fond Of Cars (and still hates musicals)

Manly but not Vanly
I confess I do possess a car.  It is reliable, comparatively cheap to run, has a splendid large boot ("trunk" to any of my trans-Atlantic readers), and stands over 6 feet* tall, which is handy as I am rubbish at remembering where I parked.  Also it has what I consider the sine qua non of any car - a CD player.
     That's it.  I care no more for any other thing about it.  To Conrad, a car is a metal box with a wheel at each corner.  You put the expensive sauce in and it goes from A to B.

That boot door keeps the rain off splendid.  Also you can hear my rock music from far, far away.  Though you might not want to ...

Ice-Cream News
     The Avocado and Coconut batch is chilling in the freezer as we sp - as I type.  This was one of the "chuck everything in a blender" recipes which are much easier and quicker than the custard-based ones.  Given the flavour combination, Conrad suspects he might be eating this variety on his own.

Grim News of Friday's Night Out
     Apparently the glass of 57% rum that I snaffled was actually Alex's.  The lad had been absent in the Gents for an age, so our party of curious cats passed his glass along, taking a sip, until it reached Conrad.
     "Down in one!  Down in one!" came the chorus, and Conrad, imagining the drink to be a communal one, did indeed down in one.
     Sorry, Alex.

Not to rub it in or anything ... (it was £7)

Grim News of Friday's Night Out Part Two
     I mentioned being dragged upon the dance floor at Moho by Claire.  Still worse is that her sister in mischief, Emma, took photos.  These, apparently, have been broadcast upon that monstrous aberration Facebook to the world and his wife, and both their sons and daughters and some nieces and nephews along the way.

So - Tanks?
     No!  Because Anna might end up reading this.  No tanks.  No armoured cars.  No weird ridiculous giant mechanical monsters. Nothing with guns, missiles or lasers.  No, instead we have  -

Piranhas!  Cuddly piranhas!

This will wow her, won't it?  I mean they are, er, veggie piranhas?  That go to church and foster orphan piranhas?

 * It may be an Italian car but here at BOOJUM! we stick firmly to Imperial measures, none of that metric nonsense.  Besides, it'll never catch on.