As Well As The Following 9,124 Of Them
Which, if your mental maths skills aren't up to it, totals 25 years, a generation and quarter of a century in cricket. I am being extra-specially daring in that last assertion, as I am only vaguely aware of the rules in cricket. The game itself is so complex and baffling that the South Canadians refused to create a bowdlerised version as they did with rounders and soccer, s
ANYWAY it's time for Art to show his skills. Or skill. Art!
'Channel train ferry with bat wings and chilli paint scheme' created this. Thank you AI Art Generator.
What am I yarking on about this time? O I thought you'd never ask!
Trains agains. SIT BACK DOWN! What I want to look at here are statistics concerning rail logistics during the early days of both the First Unpleasantness and the Second Unpleasantness, to see what had changed and what hadn't.
One thing that remained an absolute truism was that Britain remained an island. Given the utterly inadequate abilities of air transport, movement of any British Expeditionary Force had to be by rail and sea. Art!
The exotic wharves and jetties of Le Havre stand ready to greet disembarking soldiers, complete with realistic British weather. Okay, Mister Nock of 'British Railways At War 1939 - 1945' put forward a table of cargoes that the British railways had delivered to Dover for onward movement to France in 1914. He also elucidates that in the 1914 iteration, soldiers marched aboard ship, horses were lead up gangways, and standard light derricks were able to cope with all weights of equipment.
5,006 officers
125,171 men
38,805 horses
344 guns
1,574 other limbered vehicles
277 motor vehicles
1,802 motor cycles
6,406 tons of stores
This was definitely in the pre-motor era, given the number of Dobbins they were sending to France. Art!
Ol' Nock then rather blots his copybook by not providing a similar concise summary for the Second Unpleasantness, forcing Conrad to do the digging himself.
Therefore, in September 1939, the BEF was railwayed to the southern ports and transferred over to France in the following totals:
152,000 soldiers (class distinctions not what they were!)
21,424 vehicles
44,000 horses
300 tanks (unknown in 1914)
350 guns
36,000 tons of ammunition
25,000 tons of petrol
60,000 tons of frozen meat
Conrad rather jibs at that amount of frozen meat - 2.5 tons of meat per man!
Note the enormous increase in motor vehicles; a factor of x77 times greater, which explains why there was so much petrol sent over. As for the amount of ammunition - to put it another way, that it 1.5 Nagasakis you're looking at.
Ol' Nock also details that, amongst otherrs, the tanks being sent to France were far heavier and harder to transport and load than the humble truck and even the truculent horse. Art!
Two more stills from the excellent 'Engines Of War' website. I think these are actually in Egypt, not Portsmouth or Le Havre, but the point made still stands. The ones under canvas are unidentified cruisers*; that one hogging a whole flatcar all to itself is a 'Matilda II Infantry tank'. A cruiser could weigh up to 15 tons and that squat little beggar the Matilda tipped the scales at 27 tons, meaning special cranes were needed to load them onto ships from trains, and crusty trusty stevedores had to supervise their move from mainland to marine. Those old light derricks no longer sufficed. Art!
Note these 'eye' links welded to the Matilda hull, clearly visible in the one at Bovvie, and also just discernible on the one atop the flatcar. These are for offloading onto a ship via attachment to a crane, because they were being sent overseas. This is a design constraint Perfidious Albion had to contend with, as well as the Fascist administration in Italy, and a consequence of having an overseas empire to garrison and defend. Art!
In case you can't see that rather blurry script, it's January 1940, or into the Second Unpleasantness, and here you see horses being loaded into cattle-wagons in Yorkshire, as the Sherwood Rangers Yeomanry embark aboard a train, in exactly the same manner as their fathers would have done in 1914. Not a lot had changed.
One thing that the Yeomanry cannot have missed when they gave up their horses in Palestine was how thoroughly unpleasant horses can be, to their human masters and each other. One of them took a fervent dislike to the wagon they were being transported in, and proceeded to kick a hole in it's wall. Another attacked another horse and bit it severely around the head, causing a lot of bleeding moaning. Cue complicated movement between wagons to try and isolate the injured horse and the violent one. What fun cavalry have had o'er the ages!
Good in a stew
More Of Bill
Don't panic, this is more of a 'what' than a 'who'. You're getting this comedy gold because I made a note about it, and the rule is if Conrad either cooks or writes it, you get the benefit. Art!
From the picture you ought to be able to tell that there's no current here and what you're looking at is still water, not a stream or river.
Dead right. This is known in the land of the Ockers as a 'Billabong'. Technically, this is a riverine dead end where a river becomes a basin and comes to a stop. From the Wiradhuri 'Billa' for 'River' and 'Bong' NO SNIGGERING AT THE BACK for 'Dead'. Immortalised in 'Waltzing Matilda' lest ye be unaware. Conrad uncertain how a 27-ton tank dances but will take it on trust.
"The War Illustrated Edition 211 22nd July 1945"
I'm as curious as you are to see what the next illo is, now that we're past the central pages and their montage. Art!
These are scenes from Okinawa, the island battle that cemented South Canadian intent to not experience similar casualties on the Japanese home islands. To call it 'intense' as a conflict is to casually describe the surface of the Sun as 'rather hot'. For the first time, Japanese civilians were involved on a large scale. In upper port, a group of elderly Okinawans pause whilst fleeing the fighting. To upper starboard, a group of Japanese ships are discovering that Floating Bush camouflage is often ineffective. And at bottom, the 'Baka' rocket-propelled suicide bomb is examined by incautious South Canadian marines. Guys, is the warhead still intact and inside? Be more careful!
A Subtle Inversion Of The Norm
It's no hardship for Conrad to eat spinach, cooked or raw, so I was happy to utilise a recipe from my Ukrainian cookbook where it's used as a salad base with scrambled eggs on toast. Art!
Only trouble was, they said to put the scrambled eggs atop the spinach. End result was scrambled egg decorating the environment. As you can see above, Conrad now puts the egg at bottom and salad at top. End result delicious quick scoff, yah booh sucks to those of you complaining I don't eat enough veg. Spinach, mint and tomatoes, since you ask.
I Am Being Good
My early birthday from me to me is still sitting, unopened, atop my bookcase, which demonstrates my iron will. You will probably get a whole lot more about it than you want or enjoy come Sunday, haha!
Minor Earth Tremor In Rawtenstall, Not Many Bothered
Talk about insular. Art!
That's 'House in Multiple Occupancy' and is as interesting as yesterday's lettuce sandwich.
* They are definitely cruisers thanks to the suspension visible, but A9? A10? A13? Who knows.
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