A Blue Film

NO!
I can tell what your filthy minds have conjectured already, yes, even in the first sentence.  Were you not gutter-dwellers of the lowest order - or even ordure* - then you would realise that I am talking about firearms, not smutty films where people's clothes fall off at the slightest excuse.  Have I not prated on enough about how SFW BOOJUM! is?

Science Fiction Workshop?

     Here an aside.  Earlier today the pitch line for today's blog afternoon post was "We have atomic hot rods, flying Nimrods <link to blog> - fake Thunderbirds, And it's all done with words!"
     Well, DUH.  Yes, obviously it was done with words.  Until Hom. Sap. learns to compose in scents or tastes, words are going to have to do.  Which idiot is responsible for writing this stuff?

Ah, that steaming pillock.  This explains much.

     Okay, let us take a sharp conceptual turn at ninety degrees - not sure if that's Fahrenheit or Centigrade - and end up with -
     SELENIOUS ACID!
     Yes, really.  I know it sounds like a character from "Meet The Feebles", as in "Selenious Acid and his Mutant Coprophage Musical Ensemble", yet it's a real thing.  A chemical compound.  Not only is it poisonous (Yay!), it is used to create a blued finish on steel firearms as it reacts with the outermost layer of iron oxide.

Thus

     And there you have it - a blue film.  Just not how you imagined it.

     Better go put the oven on.  Those remaindered chicken steaks won't cook themselves!
     Although if left any longer they might indeed grow legs, at which point they would surely try to escape, instead of patiently waiting for the oven to heat up.

You What?
Conrad has frequently seen vehicles passing by The Mansion adorned with the marque and banners of "Rotonair", which our resident Neanderthal** sluggard Art will adorn the pages with - 


     For all your compressor needs.  Fitting that niche in the market that Hank Hill and his propane*** suppliers missed out on.
     My point is - was that you I heard whining about there not being one? - how do you pronounce the name, because to Conrad it seems there is only one: "Rottenair".
     You can imagine their telephone conversation with a potential customer.
     "Yes, we are Rotonair, supp -"
     "OMG!  Rottenair!!  You must be trying to murder us with Hydrogen Fluoride - which we read about in BOOJUM!'s earlier post today - so, no, thanks very much, we don't want to do business with you."

Rotonair would like to correct this foul and slanderous accusation. Go ahead, Rotonair -
"MMmffF!  BBbwwd - fff nnn  ggnnffmm.  GNNNMMF!"

  Er - quite.  Well, Ol' Rott, you have now been introduced to a world-wide market of potential customers, which may prevent you from sueing Conrad's gluteus maximus off.

More Questions Answered
I hope you're all big fans of "Thunderbirds", futurologist Gerry Anderson's fondly remembered marionette series from the Sixties, and his second-best show.
     The first-best?  "Captain Scarlet", though it pains me to say it.  Designed and intended to portray those nosey rascals at Spectrum in a rosy light, when in fact they FURTHER DATA REDACTED ACC. PRO U.N. RES. 2512 AUTHORISED SPECTRUM
     As if anyone would believe that, and with a pine-cone, too!  Anyway, back to the plot.  We are answering questions posed by "Unanswerable Thunderbirds Questions" over on Youtube.  Art?

A good point

       I have a killer explanation for it.  Okay, this series is supposedly set in the year 2165, okay?  By then there will be not only numerous supersonic civilian aircraft, but also frequent HOTOL launches, all from airports that are currently outside the urban perimeter of London, but which will, in forty years time, be well inside it.  Hence any loud bangs heard during night-time are automatically dismissed as either "Oh it's the 03:15 red-eye to Gatow" or "Wow they'll be in Sydney in 30 minutes".  
     The sinister seismic rumbling caused by said explosion?  Trains running in the Tube.

     Next!

Honestly, Art, if I didn't have dinner to cook I'd be getting the Tazer out -

Finally -
What's a little nuclear ordnance amongst friends?  In today's earlier post I mentioned that aerial lurker, the RAF Nimrod, which used to Loiter With Intent whilst carrying nuclear-armed depth-charges.  Since some of you have never heard of either, a little background is in order.
     A depth-charge is conventionally a cylindrical drum containing a massive charge of high explosive, which is set to go off at a given depth.  If an enemy submarine is in reasonable proximity to said depth-charge going off, it's hull will be crushed, and the entire crew dies a ghastly death.

No pressure, then

     With modern-day submarines, the old Second Unpleasantness depth-charges would be less effective, so some joker came up with the idea of making them more atomic.

     "What we need is more firepower!" as they might have said, at which point enter the B57 nuclear depth charge, which has an explosive yield not of 1/2 ton, as in the picture above, but 10,000 tons.  Enter B57, exit submarine.

Either World's Biggest Performance Art, or a B57 going bang.

*  Spelling-nazi joke
**  Really.  We had his DNA checked and everything.
*** " - and propane accessories".  Hank Hill is a Role Model Par Excellence and I won't hear a bad word said against him.