The Sound Of Fear

All Those Not Interested In Missiles May Move On
As you surely know by now, your humble scribe has more than a passing knowledge about American nuclear and thermonuclear missiles from the Fifties onwards, which is either an interesting hobby activity or a worrying knowledge of how to trigger Armageddon.
     Only joking!  No, I need your planet and it's population intact for enslavement.  No Armageddon planned.  Unless President Beiber.
     Anyway, in watching a programme about nuclear-engined aircraft, which I promise/threaten will feature in these pages in the near future, I came across mention of a missile design that had never actually made it to the prototype stage, fortunately for everyone on the planet:  "S.L.A.M."
     Supersonic Low Altitude Missile, for your information, a rather bland title for what ended up being called "Pluto", after Hades and the underworld, not the idiot Disney dog.  It is quite the nastiest weapons system I have ever encountered, and the person(s) who dreamed it up will have to serve a very long time in Purgatory before they ever get to shake hands with Saint Peter.

SLAM.  BAM.

     This thing would have been 65 feet long and weigh in excess of 30 tons.  It was an unmanned cruise missile, so there was no need to shield the reactor with weighty lead screening.
     "Okay, lay it on us," I can hear you quiveringly ask.  "If you must."
     Okay, that engine design is what they call "direct", meaning that the exhaust spews out radioactive fallout, which will contaminate any land it flies over.  This is bad news for the Sinisters.  Oh, the unshielded reactor pumping out radiation would also fatally irradiate anyone underneath the flight path, if they survived the fallout, even worse news for the Sinisters.

The profile; surprisingly similar to the Regulus 2, I'm sure you'll agree.

     "Wow, that's nasty, I -" and let me interrupt you right there as I've not nearly finished.  I did point out the Low Altitude bit of this missile-from-Hell, and this means it flies at Mach 4 at treetop level, which means the sonic shock from it's passage will kill unprotected people and animals beneath it, if they survive the radiation and fallout, as well as tumbling buildings down around people's ears.
     Now, the person(s) who conceived this monster must have been in a really bad mood for several weeks, as the Pluto carried a payload of 16 thermonuclear warheads, which it would have dropped on targets.  It would then have been crashed into a 17th target, because that would result in a very large area of the Sinister Union becoming quote uninhabitable unquote.
     It was never taken to prototype stage for a couple of reasons: one being that other technology came along that rendered it's mission obsolete, and another being that where and how would you test a monster like this?

Art!  Actually, after that, I think this is a pleasant change

Korean Noodle Soup
On a whim I bought a packet of this whilst doing the weekly shop today.  It fills quite a bowl.  Art?

     As I wasn't sure quite how to eat it, this being a novel dining experience for your humble scribe, I brought along a fork and spoon, and needed them both.  There was at least one other spectator who would have volunteered to help if I'd let her.  Enter Jenny.

Desperately keen to help.  Honestly

     She didn't get a look in, nor did Edna, as the soup had a bit of a kick to it, and whilst seeing cat and dog bitterly regretting ever having challenged human supremacy by eating Hom. Sap's food, what it might do to their insides didn't bear thinking about.

And For Today's Coincidence -
Easdale.  No, not a body of water in the Lake District, nor a brand of Makin organ.  An island of the west coast of Scotland, as featured on the programme "Coast" that I caught for a few minutes today.  Famed for it's slate industry.  No, not exporting insults, exporting roof slates!

Ex-slate industry

     The sea put an end to all this in 1850 when a huge storm flooded the quarries.  Conrad winces at typing the words "slate", "Storm" and "Flooded" because of this:

The Mansion being re-modelled

     - our slate roofing is being removed to make way for that 20th century innovation, tiles.  Thankfully the weather has been mercifully mild, even sunny, and long may this continue.

Finally
Jenny got first dibs on the Human Shaped Cushion this afternoon.

The dog has been lapped

     So I can console myself with the thought that Conrad may have few transferable skills, but he can totally go into business as a Pet Platform.