The Plaice Of Disgrace Is In This Space

No It's Not - That's Me, Lying Again!
No plaice, nor halibut, nor yet even the notorious Norwegian Death Herrings*.  This post might be a bit heavy on photographs, because that's what I've got.  On the other hand, there might be a bit of prolixity lurking in the background, just waiting to be tripped like a sinister metaphorical booby-trap, more puns than you ever needed bursting forth like a <thinks> laser rainbow.  A laserainbow!
     Where was I?
     O yes.

Hmmm.  They would be greatly be improved by being lasered.

The Day Begins:  Mobile Comm Elements Are Relocated to FOB Kitchen
Or, to be less pretentious, notebooks and i-pod are moved from the Upstairs Lair to the kitchen table:

Thus

       That's the good thing about having the house to oneself, I can set up a ton of what would be described by others as "a ton of crap" on the kitchen table and leave it there.
     The penalty for this, of course, is that you tend to get a cat lying upon exactly what it shouldn't, viz:

I have 3 makeshift bookmarks, and SHE'S LYING ON ALL OF THEM!

The Metro
I'm having to resort to Monday's edition - not being in work means that I'm not on the bus, therefore I don't get to pick up a copy of The Daily Flyswatter - and it got a bit wet somewhere along the line, so the photograph below is a bit rubbish -

 - although "rubbish" is really appropriate, nyet?

     Here a confession: Conrad has heard of this "Rihanna"** but is honestly not really clued-up on what she is.  Obviously her agents are diligent in getting her gob onto the front of papers, but perhaps they ought to also explain to us What She Does.
     Actually, no, strike that.  I really don't care.  Ignorance here is not merely bliss, it's also the much more sensible option.
     Then look at the Metro by-line:"What's that Rihanna is puffing as she cools off in Hawaii?"
     I DO NOT CARE WHAT SHE IS SMOKING!
     This is news?  NO IT ISN'T!
     "What's that Rihanna is puffing as she cools off in Hawaii?" - oh take a wild guess could it possibly be a f#!~¬**-~ CIGARETTE?

(I think the above might have been a bit of that prolixity I mentioned)

 Reminiscent Of Red Nose Day
I'm typing this at my PC with Edna draped over me like a living boa - my chair is pitched at an angle and she can't sit on my lap - and now she's jumped down.

     I won this cup on Red Nose Day for being, as I modestly put it, Extra-Specially Awesome.

     However, I've never used it before as I normally use my giant bucket-with-a-handle cups for swilling down pints of tea.  Both of them were in the dishwasher, as were most of the other cups, so - here is evidence that I do use my prizes on occasion.
     I also wonder what happened to the Welsh punk band that used to get played on John Peel every so often, whose name translated as "The Red Noses".

Sweet Potato And Corned Beef
I made this last year and Wonder Wifey gave it a provisional thumbs-up, meaning that in future she would eat it, if there were nothing left in the house and the cat and dog food had been used up.
     Well, her suggestion was to use curry spices instead of thyme and Conrad would have been perfectly happy to try that, except I couldn't find the recipe again.  It was in a free Co-Op pamphlet that come out quarterly so I spent this morning looking for it.
     Could I find it?  Not at all!
     Then I tried to find my Kenwood Gelato recipe guide, and guess what turned up:

The pamphlet.  With a cup of chilled Leek & Orange Soup.

     I've just had a bowl of it.  Tasty and filling and two of your five-a-day.  Art?

     
Oh, Twitter, You Too?
After the bizarre and facile "Suggested Groups" on Facebook that really dipped deep into the Bargain Bucket of Barmy, Twitter have followed suit.  Up comes a Tweet from "Netbrain":

"Do you feel you are troubleshooting in dark?"

     No, actually I think I'm reading an article written by someone who can't or doesn't understand the basic rules of English grammar.  And this is supposed to make me impressed by their technical ability?

I realise we haven't had any educational instruction about nuclear weapons in this post, but there is a limit as to how much of this logical insanity one can either absorb or direct.  Maybe tomorrow.


* From Hades, you know.
** Pronounced, I now declare, "Ree-Hannah"

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