I seem to be sitting in one of those high-speed time zones, for I only sat down a few minutes ago and already 30 minutes have passed. Normally, a person would need to be moving close to the speed of light for this to happen; now, I can nip up the stairs pretty rapidly but I have a long way to go to hit 186,000 miles per second.
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| Speeding lights. Close enough |
May Day!
A pretty grey, damp, soggy May Day, too.
Instead of the day, let's look at the distress call, "Mayday". Darling Daughter raised this as an issue whilst clambering into the Mobile Murder Machine*, wondering where the term came from, and why a sunny, bright, cheerful event would be associated with disaster.
"It's from the French, "m'aidez", which means "Help me", and is pronounced "mayday", declared Conrad. "This can be awkward if you're an airline pilot coming on one engine, low fuel and there's zombies and snakes on the plane, and the date happens to be May 1st. You get Air Traffic Control coming back with queries as to, are you having a party in the cockpit, mate, or is this an emergency?
| Zombie air-crew. Just one way Ryan Air cut costs! |
Rotary Action Dishdirtier
There ought to be an award for Ironically Crap Home Appliances. Let me introduce you to the rotary action dishwasher:
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| Rotor at bottom, rotor in middle |
This chucklebunny has two rotors, as visible above. The bottom one isn't a problem, it's the upper one that salts the sugar bowl. You see, if you put a plate that's slightly too big in the lower rack, it stops the upper rotor spinning.
The lower rotor, however, gets going and it gets going with much gusto. It blasts crap off the dirty lower dishes and up into the inverted cups sitting on the upper rack, then it bakes the cups dry, creating a gluey slurry only removable with hydrochloric acid, steel wool and a paintscraper.
What a result. Your cups come out far dirtier than they went in. Bah! Conrad is going to find out who invented this kitchen imp, and when that starship invasion fleet arrives someone is going to be sorry!
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| This sorry! |
Monument Valley
This location got mentioned briefly yesterday, after Big Sur. Today's cinematic audiences might not be very familiar with it, as it formed the backdrop to many a Western back in the black and white day, and most notably in John Ford's westerns. I could probably fill today's blog with nothing but beauty shots of the Valley - but that would be cheating.
Anyway, the big Valley:
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| Back in the day, wonderful scenic backdrop - for free |
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| John Ford, out where there weren't no johns, nor fords, either |
Go and Google it, although the small screen doesn't really present Utah at it's best.
A Little Critical Analysis
Now, I like to pick on Simon and Garfunkel for this, but - well, it's too easy. Today, just to prove Conrad has no favouritism, we shall tackle a bit of Elbow, and their corking track "New York Morning" from "The Take Off And Landing Of Everything":
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| Elbow. No, hang on - |
"Antenna up and out into New York"
Obviously Guy and the guys are listening to New York music stations, for they are musicians and - obviously! - take a professional interest
"Somewhere in all that talk is all the answers"
Ah, getting philosophical here. Yes, very true, Guy, but how do you filter out the noise from the signal? How will we recognise those answers? How!
"And oh my giddy aunt New York can talk"
It's alright Guy, you can swear, we're all adults here, I won't be shocked. And - er - New York talking? Guy, have you been at the Glenlivet again? I warned you about that!
"It's the modern Rome and folk are nice to Yoko"
Um, Guy, I think you'll find that Rome is the modern Rome, unless you mean the Rome of antiquity, which is a bit Euro-centric given the Persian empire, not to mention the Han - oh, and who or what is Yoko? Oh - doubtless a Pokemon. Guy you wag!
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| The Take Off of Everything. The Landing comes a bit later |
Finally
I have to post and dash as the pub quiz beckons shortly, I haven't got my shoes on or sorted out scrap-paper - but I can make time to pimp the blog with a cute PUPPEH!
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| Meet Psycho, Edna's photo understudy |
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