Okay, A Little Background First For The Ghoulish Amongst You
In medieval and early modern times, those found guilty of High Treason were sentenced to be 'Drawn, Hanged And Quartered', to get the phrase correct. The 'Drawn' part seems a bit faint-hearted, as the guilty party was taken to the place of execution on a hurdle. Art!
"For the love of all that's holy, hurry up and invent toilet paper!"
Sir William Wallace was one of the more famous recipients of this somewhat harsh treatment. Looking into the 'Drawn' a little further, it was at the very least a horribly uncomfortable method of travel. Art!
Once at the Plaza Of Punishment, the prisoner was then hung, except not with the merciful long-drop that broke the neck and killed instantly. No, they were given the asphyxiation version, until they were nearly dead, and then cut down. No, they weren't reprieved, they were then disembowelled, beheaded and their rapidly-cooling carcass chopped (perhaps sawn?) into four pieces.
So the phrase implies extreme punishment.
What else is getting extreme punishment? Why, the Ruffian economy! Figures were released by their Ministry of Finance earlier in April that show what a farrago their finances have become in Q1, which for those not of an economic bent means First Quarter, or January, February and March. Thanks to Joe Blogs for the data and background information in his next to most recent vlog. Art!
Ruffian Minister Of Finance Anton Siluanov
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| The theatre of screams |
Oil & Gas revenues in Q1 of 2023 were waaaaaaay down for this quarter last year, down to ₽1635 trillion rubles, from ₽2974, a drop of 45%.
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| Yes, every magazine is empty. Just in case. |
Expenses have also increased hugely, from ₽6029 trillion in 2022 Q1, to ₽8077 trillion in 2023's Q1, and increase of 34%. Ooo-er Matron! The expense target for the whole of 2023 was supposed to be ₽29056 trillion but is on target for ₽32308 trillion. And of course Ivan Fedorovich doesn't see any benefit from these expenses, because they're all in the military and thus a laughably large distance for any kind of improvements in society. You know, like roads and schools and hospitals, frippery like that.
Deficit for 2023's Q1 was ₽2400 trillion, up from ₽1134 trillion last year, an increase of over 100%. Ooooh that's not good either. Since the overall deficit target for 2023 was ₽2925 trillion rubles, Ruffia has now hit 83% of that total in Q1, meaning that the Ruffians are on course for a ₽10 quadrillion deficit for this year.
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| Ruffian mental anaesthetic* |
Eeee, Jean, Carol
As you may recall, today is the day that jury selection starts for the civil suit lodged by journalist E. Jean Carroll against DJ Tango. Conrad rather wondered if it would be settled out of court before actually going to trial, yet it hasn't.
So, as you should surely recall, DJ Tango and his lawyers use the same playbook that's served him and them well for the last 40 years: lie, deny and delay, delay, delay. They hope and trust that the other party will run out of money, die of old age or simply give up. Art!Close enough
Now they've been requesting a delay because EJC's trial expenses are being met by one Reid Hoffman, co-founder of LinkdIn and a donor to either the Wizard Lizard Gizzards or the Ice Cream Bandits, which the lawyers feel is the height of wickedness and depravity -
NO DELAY! replied the judge.
'On The Edge'
Back to the BBC's latest themed photography presentation on just that topic. I've skipped over a few that were, frankly, rather dull. A pigeon on a building ledge does not get the senses pounding I'm afraid. Art!
Courtesy Chris Katch
Much better. A cat looking down on humans below, as all cats believe is their natural position.
I Hate Kevin Hart
Conrad has never met the man but puts the curse of Dog Buns! upon him anyway.
Why so? Because of my rucksack. Art!
Manchester Arena Foyer
If an artist is performing in the Arena, as was Kevin Hart tonight, the security staff will not allow anyone with a large rucksack to exit via the Foyer, and my current employer is based in the Foyer. Believe me, the Arena security staff are Dog Buns! insistent on rucksack security.
So! It's off to the double doors that lead to an elevator and Floor one, then through the double set of double doors and across the car park, turn right, down Shaw Street and along the A56, and that's an extra ten minutes I'll never get back.
That's why I hate Kevin Hart.
"The Sea Of Sand"
Don't fret if you feel this load of tosh has been going on for months (it has!) as we're now nearing the end, so gird your loins. Sarah is plotting to go and see what's keeping the Doctor, who is long overdue.
‘Not a bad
idea, Miss Smith. I think we can head
back now. Dominione, can you send one of
your chaps ahead to man the look-out platform?’
Their rag-tag
convoy picked its way across the rock and sandstone to the depot again, a depot
now looking very battered. Sabotage
inflicted by previous attacks, not to mention all the fighting within the grid
of storage stacks, lent an air of untidy chaos to the whole area. Captain Dobie, had he survived, would have
been appalled.
Sarah’s idea,
of course, had been to steal transport as soon as possible, and then make her
way to Makin Al-Jinni, to rescue the Doctor.
Or at least find out what he was up to, staying away for so long.
Her intent was
noble, her opportunities were limited, and her success was negligible. The bio-vores had removed all the spare Sahariana’s
from the depot for recycling. The
Doctor’s spiking a fuel bowser days ago had destroyed the parked ranks of
Bedford and Morris trucks. Torrevechio
and Doretti kept a fatherly eye on their Sahariana’s, and the towed Bedford was
useless, the clutch destroyed.
‘Psst,’ came a
sound, rather like a soda siphon. Sarah
looked around in puzzlement, wondering who was making a gin and tonic at this
point of the day?
Finally -
Hmmmm well our batch of 32 agency staff is now down to 27. Conrad predicts that several of these will be gone by next week, thanks to the Devil's Digital Devices. We were all sternly warned on Day One that mobiles are NOT ALLOWED on the floor and can only be used in the break-out areas.
Two young ladies to my port remained tickling their phones all day.
Today a manager addressed the whole lot of us, cautioning that the Arena and environs are a very secure area - Kevin Hart can attest to that - and that our workplace is also very secure so NO PHONES ON THE FLOOR.
Not a problem for Conrad as he hates them anyway. But as for the younger generation -
We shall see. Hart!
Kev looks worried
* Sales of vodka in Ruffia are BOOMING!
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