But Before We Do -
A few frothier ones come to mind. Your Humble Scribe avoided a constitutional walk into Royton yesterday as the bus services, whilst apparently running, seemed erratic. 'One 409 every ten minutes up until 18:00' lied their website, when I could see them perhaps every 20 minutes from my Sekrit Layr. First Bus timetables - the biggest work of fiction since "Lord Of The Rings", "Ghormenghast", the collected works of Shakespeare <hack spit>, "A Dance To The Music Of Time" AND "Against The Day" all combined. Art!
Eye eye eye
With puny human for scale
So I took the car, and wouldn't you know it, witnessed the next two 409s turn up precisely to their ten-minute schedule <resigned face>. Of course - obviously! - if I'd walked then there would have been a 30 minute gap when none arrived, then three at once, because that's the way the world and First Bus work.
Were Conrad to walk into Babylon-lite, it would be both there and back again*, as there are no buses at all today. This is a relief of sorts, as you can predict exactly what their schedule will be, which is pretty unusual, you must admit.
Okay, that's the first Intro of 2022 composed and unusually short it is.
"USS Johnston"
Your Humble Scribe came across another excellent video by Metal ball Studios on Youtube, a channel we have featured occasionally in the past. I think Alvaro, the bloke who creates the videos, is Italian. Their link:
Videos tend to be comparative, featuring things like tanks or fictional starships for size comparisons. This latest one had shipwrecks arranged by order of increasing depth, which is where the Johnston comes in. She was one of a small group of convoy escorts, covering the South Canadian landings at Leyte Gulf in the Phillipines in late 1944, when the Imperial Japanese Navy turned up uninvited. With twenty-three ships, including four battleships, eight cruisers and eleven destroyers, versus seven South Canadian destroyers. Minnows against pike. Except -
Atomic minnow on steroids
Her captain and crew apparently held the view that 'defending is for pansies!' and she went all-out at the IJA, until she had been pounded literally to scrap, at which point the captain ordered 'abandon ship' and she went down shortly after**.
This is where the deep part begins. It was known where the Johnston went down with a fair degree of accuracy, which meant considerable problems for anyone trying to scope out the wreck; this is one of the deepest parts of the Pacific Ocean. A Remotely Piloted Vehicle of Caladan Oceanic went a-hunting and discovered the hull of the vessel at 21,840 feet down. Art!
Unlikely to be troubled by souvenir-hunters
This is over 4 miles down. Metal Ball's video gives you a sense of how deep and dark this is, and an appreciation of how wonderful solid dry land is.
More Monstering
Yes, more "Tormentor" because nobody's raised any objections to this DARK AND HORRID tale appearing in the normally inconsequential BOOJUM! So let's get on with it, shall we?
Supposedly, fifteen young offenders should have been
waiting in, or outside, Room C2 in the Shelley Block on Tuesday morning. When Louis walked in there were thirteen, all
talking to each other, throwing paper, picking mock fights and generally
messing about.
‘Thank you for your attention,’ he began. Most of the students quietened down and took
notice. A couple right at the front ignored their colleagues and continued
talking, at full volume, interspersing the language with curses. Louis sighed, rolled his eyes and tipped a
nod to Jennifer, who confidently strode over and slapped each chatterer around
the back of his neck. This was the cue
for the two awkwards to start whining and complaining, accusing everyone else
of attacking them, before realising that they had been hit by nothing.
‘Shut up!’ snapped Louis. ‘Anyone who p***** me off gets chucked out of
the course. If you want to spend the
next six months trying to shower alone or carry buckets of s*** out of your
cell, carry right on.’
His sheer venom stilled any
criticism to begin with. Louis reckoned
they must have discovered details of his various tutoring reprimands, and decided
to lay low for the moment.
‘First of all, we are going to
take a Basic Skills Assessment. This
shows us where you might need support.
Please treat it carefully!’
The default for a BSA was twenty
minutes. Louis gave them all until
fifteen minutes before the class change bell went.
‘Thank you so much, thank you.’
One student farted loudly.
‘Trying to use what brains you
sit upon, eh?’
That earned him a snicker or two,
and the atmosphere in the classroom lightened.
Not by much, but it was a beginning.
Ah, that Luma. Not one to suffer fools gladly, or indeed at all. He has an uphill struggle here.
I Always Say -
It's rewarding to read the end credits for a film, because that way you catch the post-credits scene some studios add on, and also because you discover interesting things in the listings. For "Love And Monsters", as an example, they had a "Cow Wrangler" which makes sense as there is a cow living in the bunker at film's beginning and strolling placidly along at the end.
They also mentioned a "Scorpio Crane", and you know Conrad, wanting to know everything all the time. Art!
It's a make of extendable crane for use with film cameras, the model above being capable of a 45 foot extension; there are others with differing extension lengths. Their sales blurb promises soft and silent operation, in case you were wondering.
So very definitely in need of wrangling
(I have seen a credit for 'Bug Wrangler')
You will further note that films like this - about giant insects taking over the world - still carry that ludicrous disclaimer about " - this film is all made up and not real in any way just in case you were wondering and we have to put this in so the swivel-eyed loons cannot sue us.' You see, swivel-eyed loons? You see what you did?
<right, rest of family have gone off shopping, Conrad is going to stretch his legs, get some fresh air and walk Edna, who is being sulky at having to make do with myself alone>
Finally -
A matter of height rather than depth. I managed to finish binge-watching "The Silent Sea" last night, which is a pretty fair South Korean sci-fi drama, set, of course - obviously! - in a dystopian future where water is a strategic commodity and the Sorks have established an enormous base (Balhae) on the Moon, purpose undisclosed. Water scarcity is hardly a novel idea but they propel it along smartly, along with the consequences of not having enough of it. Swimming pools? Long gone. Swimming itself? Unheard of. Art!
Balhae Base
Conrad unsure if a second season would be a good idea. Balhae Base has been contaminated throughout and is probably a complete write-off, so what purpose would a return to the Moon serve?
One plot device they introduced once the team arrived at Balhae was 'artificial gravity', because that meant everyone could walk normally and there'd be no need to moonwalk everywhere, which would be tiresome and expensive to recreate. So well done there.
Before anyone died
We shall come back to this one, O yes indeed!
* JRR Tolkein reference for you there
** To everyone's astonishment, the IJA retreated after getting a right shoeing.
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