Words Of Cross

You Ought To Know Conrad By Now

Any kind of word puzzle gets his immediate attention, if for no other reason than he likes to vent furiously about how difficult it was to solve yet how he managed, despite a cohort of FSB assassins trying to fulfil the desperate murderous assignations of their forefathers -

     ANYWAY we have a new lexicographical arena, namely that of The Daily Beast, to do battle within.  Art!  

Hmmmm.  No.  NO!*

     Close but no cigar.  No, The Daily Beast we refer to is an online daily website newscaster.  Originating in South Canada, they have lots of juicy sordid details about South Canadian politics, which we will not go into here, or this blog would be 3,000 words long.  Suffice to say that they confirm that South Canadian politics has not materially improved since Ambrose Bierce compiled his "Devil's Dictionary" in the late nineteenth century.

     They also have a crossword - Art!

     It wasn't that hard, thanks to alternate solutions filling in the South Canadian pop culture questions I had no clue about.  From what the website blurbs, I think that successive crosswords get harder later in the week.  We shall find out, I suppose.

     And  that's that for this Intro.  Yes, wasn't it short!

An Early Birthday Present

Conrad is 60 years old next week, although I promise to be as childish, immature and petty as I am now, which is to say Your Humble Scribe has all the developmental depth of a spiteful three year-old waving an especially sharp butcher's knife.

     ANYWAY Wonder Wifey got me a year's membership of the Imperial War Museum, quite an inspired idea.  Conrad is unsure why they still retain the "Imperial" in their title; perhaps it appeals to the tourists?  There are five sites: the London museum - Art!

     No doubt someone somewhere will be offended by this picture.  O dear.  These monsters are 15" guns as mounted on battleships of the First Unpleasantness vintage, and to give you a better idea of scale - Art!

     It must be at least 15 years since I last visited.  Listy - you know, that blogger who publishes REAL BOOKS - paid a recent visit and said a lot of the bigger kit that stood in the foyer has gone.  If he'd been writing on paper with ink it would have smudged from his tears.  This introduces us to IWM Duxford.  Art!

     I think the bigger kit absent from London has gone to Duxford - note that line about "WW1 to 1969".  The thing about Duxford is that I would need to catch two trains and a taxi to get there, costing about £100, and that's from a couple of years ago.  So Your Humble Scribe will be travelling in The Beast if at all.  O, that very same Listy has also visited Duxford, and recommended it over London.  Proof in the pudding, I say.

     There are three other IWM sites, which we're not going into today as I can see your minds glazing over.  Next!

The Haul

There is an unusual - O I say, here's a Scotch Egg I've left out of the fridge for a couple of days, and it's four days past it's Sell By Date - nah, it'll be fine <scoffing noises for a couple of minutes> where were we?  O yes - food safety - a challenge not a guideline!

     ANYWAY since I had to venture into Oldham, the sinful city, I popped into the British Heart Foundation shop, to see if they had acquired any interesting books since my last visit.

     Well, no, they hadn't.  What they did have were the following:

      Conrad has never tackled a 3D jigsaw puzzle before, so this will be, at the very least, interesting.  Also quite chuffed at getting those "Dad's Army" and "Yes Prime Minister" DVDs as these are classic comedies which YOU YOUNG WHIPPERSNAPPERS are probably entirely ignorant of.  Ha!  Serves you right.

     But stay!  For the tale of our haul is not yet complete.  Art!

Gasp!

     For Lo! Conrad bought two pairs of jeans, a pair of cargo pants and a shirt.  The jeans are essential since my current trio are all full of holes, and the office dress code is "No distressed jeans"; mine were so distressed people on the street were taking up a charity collection for them.  First time clothes shopping in probably a couple of years.

"The Bureau Of Reclamation"

I have already threatened you with this South Canadian institution, so don't look surprised.  It is part of the 'Department of the Interior' and at a later date we may see what other bits and pieces come under that banner.  Art!

"Only we can prevent mountains**"

     Their principal occupations are running and maintaining dams, hydroelectric power stations and canals.  Interestingly enough, they do not cover the whole of South Canada, only the West and 17 states out of the CONUS.  Art!

Them

     The BoR has built over 600 dams across their catchment area, as well as 53 hydro-electric power plants.  The Hoover Dam is one of theirs, except everyone puts pictures of that up, so let's instead have their Grand Coulee Dam, as it was under construction, to give you a sense of scale -

     - and here's one from after it's inauguration, showing the depth of water retained by the dam as compared to the river depth downstream.  Art!

Official BoR photo.  Thanks, BoR!

     And now you know why their official logo appears as it does.  Art!

     Conrad, inquisitive as ever, wonders why "Reclamation" and not "Hydro-Electric Power"?  Or just "Hydrology"?  One feels that reclamation professionals in the Netherlands would be confused.

Finally -

I think a little dog-trot is called for whilst it is merely threatening to rain, rather than wait and risk having to do a Donald Fagan.  Edna would be happy under either circumstance, true, but Your Humble Scribe already had one shower this morning and is not eager to experience another.

A superlative album, by the way

     Besides, I don't want to get my brand new cargo pants wet.

     Chin chin, chaps, tally ho, what what what!

*  Apologies to Frederick Brown.  Really.  Sorry, Fred

**  Possibly not entirely accurate.