Whatever That Might Be
O I'm sorry, were you expecting something sensible? Then you are most definitely in the wrong place. We do killer analyses of zombie films, scrutinise nursery rhymes to a 'T' and gargle with delight over radioactive, explosive and toxic compounds, but - sensible? Hmmmm no.
ANYWAY Your Humble Scribe was going to hold forth on a newspaper headline he saw last night, as featured on the BBC's website, which went "Three Lions Thump Old Enemy" and here's the evidence. Art!
However, what do we find when attempting to drill down into the article on the BBC's website? Nothing other than an error code "404" and 'Page not found'. Ten minutes later the page is back, a pause Conrad assumes is down to solicitors poring over that title "Three Lions Thump Old Enemy", for these are the Teutons we are talking about. "Is it defamatory? Inflamatory? Derogatory? Suppository?" and so on, worry the lawyers. Apparently not, for the pages are back up and with hilarious irony it's the 'Daily Mail' with the sub-title that sent all those legal pulses racing. Art!
Why irony? Because in the Thirties, when Herr Schikelgruber was marching up and down, threatening the lesser races and demanding unlimited rice pudding*, guess which newspaper was right behind him all the way?
No! Not the "North Sneddlepool Pig-Breeders Gazette" - the "Daily Mail". This has meant that it gets pulled out as a figurative club by everyone and anyone with an axe to grind and a beef to raise (mixing three metaphors at once in no bother for the blog!). This is not our intent today. Rather, we intend to point out the erroneous sub-title. "Old Foe"? Pshaw!
If we are speaking historically, then don't forget that the King's German Legion fought FOR the British from 1803 onwards. Way before then, in 1756, Prussia - the beating Teutonic heart of Germany - became an ally of Britain.
If it's in an Osprey, then it must be true
If we consider the Teutons to be diametrically opposed to This Sceptred Isle from 1914 to 1945, then we find that they have been our allies for an awful lot longer than enemies.
Quite the sneering put-down.
Conrad studiously ignores the possibility that this might be to do with sport, as he knows nothing about it, and cares less because yes, negative cares are a thing. If they weren't before, Your Humble Scribe just made them.
Of course, I might be over-thinking this a bit ...
"Magnificent"
It's in the title because Conrad was pondering on it a couple of days ago, which inevitably results in a recourse to the Collins Concise. Ah, etymology!
Also inevitable is that it has a Latin root <hack spit> - yet it also allows us to reverently refer to one of the great westerns -
We shall ignore the recent remake. ANYWAY back to Latin and "Magnus" for "Great" and "Facere" for "To Do", which formed "Magnicifus", and thence to "Magnificentior" and you can join the dots for the rest. Art!
"From the famous novel by Booth Tarkington" says the blurb. Hmmmm. Hardly a magnificent name, is it? In fact it sounds like the pseudonym assumed by a disgraced accountant found guilty of embezzlement.
Hmmm "Embezzlement" now there's a word to ponder on - but No! for we have yet to accommodate my Frothing Nitric Ire.
Accommodating My Frothing Nitric Ire
So kind of you to do so! For yes, we are back to the M.E.N. Codeword, that predictable source of annoyance beyond all understanding**, and let us not beat about the small domesticated shrub:
"MANDRAKE": Not to be confused with Youtuber Post-10, who is Man And Rake. No, this word is a corruption of the original Greek "Mandragoras", quite possibly because the roots of this plant were held to resemble human form, and "Drake" means "Dragon" in Low German. Art!
Like looking in a mirror
People believed all sorts of bosh about it, as in that when you pulled it from the ground, it screamed and anyone too close would instantly drop dead, because yes screaming can really do that, except it has to be at 5000 decibels in order to harmonically pulp your internal organs***.
There's also this chap
"TROPISM": Er, what? A tendency to Trop? Hang on - ah, "The tendency of an organism, especially a plant, to react to outside stimuli in such a way to closer approach that stimuli, which is pretty technical biology and should not be resorted to by crossword or codeword compilers". There you go. Art!
Go on, watch this annoy someone. "That poor plant!" etc.
"THROVE": Presumably the past tense of "Thrive"? Yes, I looked it up. WHAT? WHAT! When did you last read or hear this word? NEVER! I bet it went out of use in the eighteenth century.
"They throve,
'Pon the treasure trove.
Found under a mangrove.
Let us be clear
About botany here.
'Twas not a mandrake.
That would be a mistake."
Art!
That's all on that word.
The mangrove
"UMBRAS": <chokes in apoplectic fury> YOU WHAT! MORE LATIN! Where's the controls for my Remote Nuclear Detonator? Art!
Note to those who thought it meant very small umbrellas: you were wrong.
There was more but I dare not continue with this subject as it's very bad for my blood pressure. I also trod on the controls for the RND and need to get it sent off to Doomsday Industries Inc for repair, so some of you can breathe a little easier. Not for long, it's going to be couriered there and back.
Finally -
Apologies for another random word popping up in my mind, which is both inexplicable and welcome, as it means less casting around to create content. Today's random word is "Cuyahoga" which Your Humble Scribe was aware of having a South Canadian aspect. A quick bout of wrestling with Google and I find that it is a county in Ohio, whose county capital and indeed largest metropolis is Cleveland, which might be familiar to you as featured in the theme tune to "The Drew Carey Show", where Ian Hunter goes on about "Living in sin with a safety pin" yes quite Ian we are not here to judge. Art!
Where it sits in Ohio
Let's have a picture. Art, again!
Ah yes, apparently the river was a bit of a one for - er - catching fire.
I think that's enough material facts now. Back tomorrow at the same Rat Time, on the same Rat Channel!
* Okay, okay, I pinched this from 'Doctor Who'. If it's good enough for the BBC's premier dramamentary it's good enough for BOOJUM!
** But which, to be honest, does generate a fair bit of content.
*** Or so I've heard.
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