More Irony Than A Foundry

Do You See What - O You Do
Yeah, them South Canadians may be the world's leading superpower, but we effete Europeans can rest content in the knowledge that they don't get irony.  When they do, it will be all over for our culture.
     Anyway, this will only make sense if you are aware of the artwork of Chris Foss, who has graced many a sci-fi novel's cover.  Let us have one of them.  Art?

What's this?  I have no idea, but it looks great.

     The thing is, Ol' Chris isn't actually a fan of science fiction.  He tends not to read the novels he's illustrating and prefers to make stuff up from his own imagination, which is a bit like being an haute quisine chef who only likes fish and chips or Spam butties.

This, for example

     I am intimately familiar with this novel and can tell you that at no point does a spaceship fall into the sun (or whatever is going on here).  I can tell you that the supposedly bad guys are called the Reegs, which is a name for one of the splinter bands produced when The Chameleons split up.
     Where were we?  O yes -
     Well, I thought it was an amusing and ironic circumstance, and once again, whose blog is it?
     Right, motley, let's recreate that cover illustration.  You stoke up the fire and I'll get some cardboard boxes together!

"Monty's Men" By Professor John Buckley
You can thank the podcast "We Have Ways" for this one, as I seem to recall Jim Holland recommending it highly.
     <short interval whilst I go put the oven on and boil some water>
     Ol' Jon's approach is that the army of Perfidious Albion has been roundly and soundly condemned for it's conduct from D Day onwards, in what he finds to be an entirely unfounded manner.  Art?

Yup, Alameda, California, South Canada

     Another irony - this quintessentially British book is published by the South Canadian Yale Press, and it was cheaper for Conrad to purchase it from over the waters than here in the Pond of Eden (as it is especially wet today).  Cool library stickers, however, and I'm not going to peel them off.  
      Incidentally, the Mythbusters team used to film dangerous explosive stuff at Alameda.
     Oh, I should also append that Ol' Jon mentions one of the culprits about Brit-bashing to be Max Hastings, who in his writings is in fact channelling the spirit of Josef Goebbels.  Max is slavishly adulatory about everything Teutonic, and you get the feeling that he is deeply disappointed that they lost the Second Unpleasantness, because in his analysis they ought to have won.
     Anyway, we shall most certainly be returning to this book, so get used to it being mentioned.

The Prof, in pensive mood

      <another pause whilst I go and put the Quorn nuggets in the oven>

"Nazi War Machines - Secrets Uncovered"
More Jim Holland!  No thanks to Channel 4, who didn't put this up until 48 hours after the program had aired.  Bad Channel 4!  Go stand in the corner until you learn to behave!

     Last night it was the turn of "Guns", starting on the Luger pistol and working up to the Pak 43 anti-tank gun.  I should have taken a picture of Jim's Teuton friend, who has enough weapons in his collection to equip a couple of battalions.  They started with the Luger P08 pistol, an iconic bit of Teuton kit, which, if Art will do the honours -

Thus

     Jim proved what a miserable shot he is with one of these.  They handle very well indeed, thanks to the way the grip is fashioned.  However - you just knew that was coming, didn't you? - they were expensive to manufacture, and prone to jamming in anything less than pristine conditions.  Over-engineered, you see: there was no margin for error in Teuton weapons, they were made to stringent standards.  Jim uncovered some statistics showing that in December 1944, 50 thousand pistols did not pass muster out of 80 thousand produced, so they were junked, melted down and the whole process was begun again.

Jim with friend.  And Johan.

     As has been said, "The best is the enemy of the good" and we will be coming back to this subject again*.

"Black Summer"
 Conrad had vaguely heard about this being a spin-off from "Z Nation", although that may just be his imagination at work**.  Whereas ZN dumped you into the Zombie Apocalypse in it's third year, BS is about a couple of months into it.  Art?

There you go

     Wonder Wifey shrewdly observed that the people with guns made the mistake of not shooting zeds in their heads, so it must be early in the Apocalypse.  She also observed that this must be an alternative universe where the concept of zombies does not exist, which Conrad has considered as a thesis before, and it applies to pretty much every zombie film and television series ever made.  Of course, in my MSS "Revelations" I address this very issue.

Conrad, busily addressing.

You What?
Conrad, as you may be aware, is a curmudgeonly old git who exists in a perpetual state of muted anger (frequently un-muted for the pages of the blog), and is not a big fan of reality television.  In fact reality television shows rankle him.  So - 

     Who on earth is this?  What is "Love Island" and why should Your Humble Scribe be bothered about it?  And why is this a news headline?  I think I have gone from Rankled to Frothing Nitric Ire in the space of a couple of paragraphs***.  There is room for some punning about "Flack" except I can't be bothered.
     Bah!

Finally -
Did you know that "Saving Private Ryan" was loosely based on the true story of Fritz Niland, one of four brothers.  Two were killed in action and the third was believed to be dead but was actually a prisoner of war.  Art?

Thus

     And with that, we are done!

*  Max Hastings cries in a corner.
**  It's a hard-working imagination.  Where else does all this come from?
***  I like to exercise it every so often.