Abusmal

NO! No, No,No, That Is Not A Typo
Let me set the scene.  Conrad, able to do so now, walks into Royton on his Sunday afternoon constitutional, passing by the 409 bus stop where he will need to catch the bus back home: a single constitutional stroll is one thing, two is overdoing it.  It's about 15:40 and there's a lady waiting for the 15:44 service.  
     Here an aside.  You can't go too late to the Co-Op or they'll have put all the unsold newspapers away, and I wanted the Oldham Times for the Skeleton.

The Dodo: First Bus mascot

     Anyway, I amble to get the shopping - baby potatoes especially - then get some cash out, then amble my way back to the bus stop (a whacking big bag of cat litter means you can't move beyond an amble), confident that I'll have missed the 15:44 and aiming for the 15:59 instead.
     Yet what's this?  That very same lady I passed earlier is still here, joined by three others.  Obviously the 15:44 is late.  Art?

"The 409 Ashton to Rochdale service has been slightly delayed by a space-time discontinuity"

     A 409 turns up at 15:54 and immediately takes off once we all board, meaning it's the late bus.
     This resonates with Your Humble Scribe because he's back at work tomorrow, where he has to trust to the vagaries of First Bus getting to and (especially!) from Gomorrah on the Irwell.  
     At the same time, the BBC website - that font of all that's fit to be writ - has an article on public transport services, for which read buses, with some very irate passengers saying that politicians ought to travel by bus for a week, just to experience the whole vile farrago.  It's an article with a sorry tale of cut services, cut budgets, commercial pressure over any responsibility to the public, cut services, late or absent buses, excessive fare rises, and cut services.

Did we mention cut services yet?
(And, to avoid being sued, yes, this is from the BBC website)

     One reason that The Modern Babylon ("London" if we're being formal) has experienced an increase in bus passengers is because they have an overall governing authority that tells the wicked evil incompetent worthless scheming bus companies what to do and how much to charge, and if they dare break the rules they are submerged in molten lava told off very severely.  No chance of that happening elsewhere across the country, is there?*
     So, this is where you get today's title from: a pun on "Abysmal".
     Motley, butter us some toasted muffins, for I feel a tad down in the mouth.

Oh!  For some inexplicable reason, I feel so much better

"Raising Churchill's Army" By David French
<cackles with glee>  Ah yes, this is a work I borrowed from Oldham Library many years ago, because I think it had been recommended as a serious and scholarly work on just that title: the British army of the Second Unpleasantness.  Professor French, for he is just that, set out to dispel some of the myths about the armies of Perfidious Albion in the Second Unpleasantness.  I believe I have used a phrase he came up with a couple of times: "The British army decided that they would be soldiers, not warriors" to paraphrase somewhat.  Conrad is not sure where this line turns up, but I will let you know when I find it.  Art?

Not a wildly exciting cover, I admit

     If you have seen my review of James Holland's work "Normandy 44" then you will know Jim alludes to what he calls "Big War", where technology, firepower, horsepower and mechanisation all take precedence over manpower, which is a theme Ol' Dave also develops.  I know this because I cheated and have already read his "Conclusion" chapter.  You will probably hear more about this work than you like over the next few weeks as I read it.

Say Hello To The Rest Of Your Life
Once again Conrad cannot remember exactly how or why he got down this particular rabbit hole, but yesteryon he ended up checking out the South Canadian traitor Robert Hanssen, who was uncovered way back in 2001.  Mister Hanssen appears to have sold secrets to the Sinisters and then Ruffians for nothing more noble than money, which he spent at strip clubs and in the company of <ahem> exotic dancers.
     To avoid becoming dead, as the South Canadians took his treachery rather badly, he plea-bargained a sentence of 15 life sentences,with no parole.  So he would have to live into the 24th century to be eligible for release.  Art?

Imagine this for 300 years**: ADX Florence Supermax prison

     Everything you can see is made of concrete, with nothing present that an inmate could use to harm themselves or others, and said inmates are in there for up to 23 hours a day.  The most they can see from the window is the sky overhead, the whole place can be locked down at the touch of a button, there are whacking big fences and guards armed to the teeth ready to shoot on sight.  Not the Ritz!
     So, he's been in there for 18 years already, and he's not going to be going anywhere soon.  The pangs of remorse might be biting about now, hmmm Rob?

Finally -
We've been unremittingly grim this evening, haven't we?  Let's try to lighten the mood, with a discourse on LITHIUM WAFER BATTERY DES - hmm, no.  
     How about a gigantic truck?  A truck big beyond the bounds of reason?  Art!

Behold the beast

     This thing is a rolling apartment complex on wheels, with a lounge, a bathroom, four bedrooms and a terrace created by letting down the tailgate.  It weighs 50 tons, and I've not been able to find out how much it costs.  Millions, probably.  It moves under it's own power though crossing bridges would be a bit risky -

     And with that we are done!



*  Just you wait until I take over.  O there will be a reckoning.
**  Sutekh knows how you feel, matey.