Area 51, Forgive Me

I Know You Will -
 - for do I not have a winning smile?  YES I DO!  That was a rhetorical question, there was absolutely no need to get snarky about it <panics and looks around warily for Mister Hand's interjections, finds none, wipes brow, carries on>

Conrad's winning <winces violently> - his "winning smile"
(Heaven only knows what the "Losing" one looks like)

     Okay, if you have been keeping up with things, then you know that some bafoon suggested on Facebook that a mighty assembly of as many as 15 or 16 keyboard warriors ought to storm the fences at Area 51.  Yes, yes, I know 2,000,000 people said they were going to do it, but you have to factor in Couch Potato Physique, Distance To Travel, Loss Of Signal and Desert Creepy Crawlies.  I'm probably being overly-generous with those totals of 15.
     Anyway, I had pondered that The Camo Guys - those anonymous security people who un-smilingly guard Area 51 - would have lethal kinetic energy weapons mounted on drones in order to intercept any drones from Outside, such being the inevitable first response from those couchy spuds who had managed to make it to Nevada.  "Ooh ooh let's spy on them first, so we know what we're getting into -"

Art!  A little less lethal, thanks.

     It seems I am well out of the loop.  My excuse is that I'm an authority on the conflict of the First Unpleasantness, the Second at a pinch, and that anything after that is science fiction.
     It appears that things are kicking off in the Straits of Hormuz, which is a geographical lie, as they are twisted as anything.  Tankers getting mined, tankers getting hijacked, tan

"Did I hear "THING"?"

     GO AWAY! Mac, we've got things contained here.  Seriously.  Go look for people who need their marshmallows toasting -
     AS I WAS SAYING, tankers etcetera.  So, the South Canadian navy and Marine Corps come to pay a visit and make nosey in the region, because HM Government have now admitted/confessed/stated <delete where applicable> that the Royal Navy is too small to do the job.*  They are now up against the Persian Liars, whom you might call "Revolutionary Guards" if you were feeling formal.  The Liars try to take things down to the wire, aware that if they reeeally push things, then they will get their bottoms spanked, which never looks good on a newsfeed.
     Okay, so the Liars send a drone right into the face of a South Canadian warship, where the bit you need to pay attention to here is the "war-" part -
     SIZZLE!
     The on-board Devil Dogs have an apparatus that will turn the opposition's drones into non-aerodynamic recycle fodder, which apparatus was sitting up on deck.  Art?       
           

     This kit comes with more acronyms than you can shake several sticks at: all we really need to know is that it will knock a drone out of the sky as effectively as a giant fly-swatter.  Since the Persian Liars are terrible losers, they are now sitting and frothing with rage, before coming up with a cover story that flatters them.  "It was aliens"  "It was a seagull"  "It was aliens with seagulls" "It was Dick Dastardly and the Vulture Squadron" etcetera.

Come to think of it ...

     They would have had to test these things somewhere, wouldn't they?  And where better, far from prying eyes, than Area 51 ...
    Which is where we came in.
     <dreams of terrible torments he might have inflicted on the motley, were it not for that damned injunction>

Whilst Talking Technology
Mister TANK himself, Listy, or David Lister if we're being formal, was hearkening on the subject of Canal Defence Light tanks, and from there his musings wandered over to lasers, because they're kind of related.  Art?  CDL!

The Matilda CDL prototype

     According to Listy, the introduction of solid-state rather than gas lasers is what done it.  The power requirements are now a lot less, and the laser output a lot higher, to the extent that an Unmanned Aerial Vehicle - or "Drone" if we're being informal - can be permanently blinded by lasers at a distance of six miles.  At a range of two miles, said UAV's can be turned into toast, by a 10 kilowatt laser weapon.
     Enter - Dragonfire!
     NO!  Nothing to do with "Game of Thrones".  Art?

The thing

     This thing is a 50 kilowatt weapon, and as you can see it's mounted on a ship.  This makes sense, as a ship has an enormous engine easily capable of generating the laser power needed for as long as it's needed.  In a few years, given the pace of technology, I predict that we'll be seeing these things mounted on tanks and other vehicles, perhaps with sufficient inherent power to burn through armour.
     Hmmm.  The future will be interesting.**
I Babble Of Babbage
Charles Babbage, that is, the internationally renowned polymath, which is merely another way of saying he was extremely clever in a lot of ways.  Really, go look him up.  In fact I believe Bruce Sterling wrote a counter-factual steampunk novel based on Babbage's "Difference Engine" being successfully constructed in the early Victorian era, leading to the computer revolution taking place in about 1850.  Art?

Sic

     In the novel, the Mighty And Glorious British Empire is even more mightier and glorious than it ever was here, and Conrad doesn't doubt that the inch, pound and mile all take their rightful place as the measurements of choice across the globe.  None of that silly metric nonsense.  Oh, and William Gibson was also involved, Mister Cyberpunk himself.***
     Anyway, what I wanted to say was what Rosie remarked upon at the Pub Quiz, something that she'd seen or heard at an exhibit-cum-installation during the Manchester International Festival.  Mr. Babbage apparently believed that every sound ever made was still present in our atmosphere, to some extent.

Ol' Chas, looking a bit liverish

     At first glance this might seem a tad bizarre, yet if you consider sound waves as a form of energy, it begins to make sense, because you cannot destroy energy.  Make a sound today and the energy of that sound will dissipate and become almost infinitely attenuated, but it will still be there.
     If you think about it, this is rather similar to the astronomy project that captured the echoes of the Big Bang - and did so.

By using the world's biggest ear trumpet!

     Okay, having offended astronomers everywhere, it is time for Conrad to duck and cover.

Where I duck under cover.

*  Ouch.  That stings.  I shall come back to this.  O YES!

**  If we actually get there intact.
***  I bet he feels silly about postulating how business would take over the world.  Carrillion or Morgan Stanley, anyone?