Dam And Blast!

OH FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!
No, I have not made a spelling error.  Your humble scribe does not make spelling errors.  I have said this loudly and at length and you still can't get it - I should inscribe "NOT A SPELLING ERROR" on the side of carpet tacks and whack them into your skulls with a hammer and maybe then you'll get the hint.

Or maybe just one giant one -

     Ahem <pauses to let Seething Radioactive Rage quieten a tad>.
     What I want to inform you about is a very worrying phenomenon, which I only became aware of in detail today, ironically enough as I stared out of the window whilst water poured along the streets in a deluge.

Typical weather in Gomorrah-on-the-Irwell
(occasionally Gomorrah-in-the-Irwell)

     Dam failure.
     No, this is no light-hearted punning quip, it's a serious global problem and has been for over a century.  Dams, you see, are or were not always constructed to the highest standards, or with adequate safety margins, or on ground free from faults that weren't detectable at the time.  Thus flooding or erosion can lead to sudden catastrophic collapses.  Let us look at one such in the Piave Valley in Italy: the Vajont Dam disaster of 1963.  Art?

The dam and reservoir whilst filling

      The dam was constructed despite serious concerns about the stability of the valley's southern side; there had been earth movement at the neighbouring Pontesei Dam, though no trouble ensued.  However, after the reservoir had been filled, a gigantic landslide slipped into the waters and displaced 30 million tons of water; the dam did not break, which might have slightly slowed the flow.  Instead the water all went over the top and scoured out the valleys below, killing nearly 2,000 people.  Art?

As it is now

     This is the view over the reservoir, or where it should be - completely blocked by the moving mountainside.  
     Bad enough, you might think.  Yes, if there hadn't been an earlier dam disaster in Bergamo ...
     Which is enough sombre for one morning.  Let us give the motley tea and cake and scones with strawberry jam!*

Ha!  Take That, You Miscreants!
Conrad comes galloping to the rescue of Gerry Anderson, answering those questions that have occupied the minds of men since the mid-Sixties, or some hair-splitting pedants since last week.  Yes, it's back to deconstruct, discommode and depilate those chaps who persist in asking "Unanswerable Thunderbirds Questions".  Art?  

     Let me recap that for you: was Scott ever held accountable for murdering Victor Gomez and Johnny Gillespie in 'Move - And You're Dead" ...
     No.  Because he didn't murder them.  The two car thieves - who had left Alan and Grandma Tracy about to be disintegrated by a bomb, remember - crashed their stolen car  during a high-speed pursuit and killed themselves.  Next!

     This is pushing it, frankly.  Their "entire civilisation" amounts to a few dozen people lurking under a pyramid**.  Oh, and did I mention that this very same so-called 'civilisation' SHOT DOWN THUNDERBIRD ONE WITH NO REASON OR WARNING?
"Blastermen, Activate Your Scopes!"
It's a line from 'Forbidden Planet', an order given by Captain J. J. Adams, as the crew of the C57D prepare to tackle the Id Monster, and I use it because I want to introduce the subject of that sci-fi staple, the blaster.

This Id ain't hid

     This hand-weapon appeared in the early pulp magazines, because you can't have your thrilling stories of super-science dependent upon a knife, club or revolver, can you?  No, you need a hand-gun bristling with coils and flanges and wires and lights, preferably one that's atomic-powered, because back then Atomic = Better.  Art?

Flash Gordon with an impressive weapon.  And Maid Marian?

     One positive aspect of zapping a victim with an atomic hand weapon was the absence of blood and guts, meaning that your publication or later television programme or even film didn't have to worry about censorship.  Either you completely vapourised them, leaving only a barbecue whiff, or they suffered a little scorch mark.  Even with the more realistic rendition, where shooting someone in the heart meant nothing left below the head or above the belt, there was still no gore.  Art?

Frying tonight!

     This subject has legs, so I shan't keep harping on about it in this blog entry.  Expect more, though.  MUCH more!

Robert Anson Heinlein, We Salute You
If you recall RAH, you'll know he had a bit of a pash for private industry and the individual creating rockets and interplanetary spaceships.  Something about the Dean Drive?
     Anyway, he begins to look more like a visionary and less a reactionary, with the news that Elon Musk is going to be sending 8 or 9 people into space and around the Moon, perhaps by as soon as 2023.  One presumes they will be paying quite a few pounds for this privilege, aboard the BFR ("Big Falcon Rocket" you dirty-minded rascals).  Art?

Artist's impression

     This is great!  It will send all the conspiranoid loonwaffle Apollo hoaxers into mental knots trying to fathom how this all fits into The Grand Conspiracy Collective, and whether Elon Musk is an Elite Reptiloid in diguise, or just a bit odd.



*  Keeping it emotionally off-balance.
**  A pyramid made out of solid TNT, it would further seem.  After all, with TNT as a construction material, what could possibly go wrong!