What The Hell It's William Tell!

I Apologise For The Vulgarism
"What the heck" doesn't rhyme, you see, yet please note I didn't go for anything more extreme that Hades.

A cable-splitter.  It will make sense later on.

     Now, you are probably wondering why Conrad, who has of late been bruiting around his sheer Britishness in the belief, mistaken or not, that this is what attracts readers, begins today's post with someone Swiss.
     Wait, it gets better.  I'm not referring to WT per se, rather to -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7O91GDWGPU

     - the William Tell Overture, by Rossini.
     "Okay, now I'm really confused," I hear you say, in a complainy tone of voice.  "He's Italian."
     What can I say?  I like the William Tell Overture and thought I'd share that with you.
     Okay, let us now move on.  Is that okay?  It is?  Thank you so much!

The Christmas Haul
Conrad understands that, at this time of year, it is the tradition amongst you Hom. Sap. to post details of what you got as presents.  Don't worry, that will come later.  First let me gloast about my victory at the Pleasant Inn - a bottle of brandy won in the raffle.  Art?

     Phil and Rosie both examined it and pronounced it quality stuff, which is good enough for Conrad, whose experience of brandy is limited to cheap ones for use in baking.
     Let me regale our international readers with a picture of the Pleasant Inn:

The in place.  Do you see - O you do.

     I may be able to find an interior picture.  Art?

     It's a very traditional British pub, none of this themed nonsense, without any kind of electronic entertainment - no televisions or juke box, thank you very much.  To be found at the junction of Springfield Road and Rochdale Road in Royton.  If you happen to pop in, do tell Janet the Cool Landlady that BOOJUM! sent you.

Doctor Who Christmas Special:"The Return Of Doctor Mysterio"
This took Conrad rather by surprise as he, being forgetful, hadn't realised it was - er - Christmas Day*.  I suppose the presents thing should have been a clue.
     Anyway, this particular special feature's Conrad's guilty pleasure, superheroes.  Well, superhero, singular, him being "The Ghost".  Conrad - with an hilarious self-satisfied snicker - also noted the mention of Siegel and Schuster, the creators of Superman.  Props to Steven Moffat for sneaking that in.

The Doctor.  Making grey-haired men look cool and groovy, which is just fine by your humble scribe

     "It's not going to be one of those schmaltzy comedy ones, is it?" asked Wonder Wifey.  Hmmm.  Let me see.  You have the Head-Splitting Zipper Zappers, and New York a whisker away from being turned into a cloud of glowing vapour, and security drones with only half a head - no, not too sugary.

"When I asked for a "splitter" THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT!"

     It was also a nice twist to see superpowers as a curse, in that the adolescent Grant has x-ray vision that he cannot control.  This proves two things:  i) Grant has a sound moral compass, and ii) Conrad in his place would have ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM with this superpower.  Read from this what you will.
     Again, a change to see a superhero who has no terrifying dark secrets, no clash of morals, no mercenary instinct, who does what he does merely because it's the right thing to do**.

For a ghost, rather hard on windows

     Having saved the day, the Doctor can then stand back and allow UNIT to sweep in and do the heavy lifting.  Noble UNIT***!  
     Not sure why they had Nardole in this one, though.

Is It Just Me?
I realise it might be, as Conrad's Weltanschaung^ is, shall we say, structured a little differently from that of human beings.  Anyhow, take a look at this:

Perhaps it is just me

     Now, I see this as a gaping maw almost on the border of laughter, except I recall that scene from "L.A. Story" where Steve Martin is describing, in explicit detail, what he sees in a painting.  The camera pulls back to show a bland, undifferentiated mass of scarlet.
     Let me know in the Comments.  Be honest, I can take it.

What Are You Thinking?
Normally I preface this by reassuring you, the reader, that telepathy does not exist, and then hilariously qualify this by adding the word "Yet".
     Well well George Orwell, guess who got his hands on DARPA's prototype Telepathy Helmet?
     So I can answer that question "Why, on a day that's a holiday, are you only posting one novel blog entry?"
     Simple, because Conrad has a social life, which might be etiolated and occasional yet which is still there, and I was out bowling this afternoon, then being a chauffeur for Darling Daughter, boyfriend (the quiet and respectful) Tom and Bestie Erin.

That's Tom in white, being brilliant at bowling, the dark horse

     Don't worry, you'll get more of this, in detail yet.


*  I realise this completely contradicts the post above it, but so what? and whose blog is it?
**  Sound moral compass, like I said.
***  Actually an interfering bunch of swines who keep detaining me.
^  German for "World view", which is not exotic enough.