These (Stranger) Things Are Sent To Try Us

And They Work - I Am EXTREMELY Tried!
Don't worry, I'll work 'Stranger Things' in later on.
     First of all, you should know by now that the faintest conception of the merest zephyr of - why yes I am still reading Dickens, how did you know? - of "public transport" is likely to send your humble scribe into paroxysms of rage, or what I like to call my "Frothing Nitric Ire".
     So, as I hurried my palsied and aching frame from The Electric Goldfish Bowl to the bus stop, aware I was late, the best I could look forward to was a window seat.  I don't set my sights too high, do I?
     Imagine how flabbergasted I was in the queue to get a text from Wonder Wifey.
     "You are gonna think I'm joking but ... part of Rochdale Road has fallen into a sink hole."
     Conrad imagined the worst.

No, Conrad, get some perspective.

     It was bad enough to prevent buses from travelling up or down the road, meaning that - well, were they still running?  First Bus cancels bus services if a leaf falls into the gutter, so it wasn't a given that they'd manage to re-route them -
     - oh, was that the 24 driving off whilst my attention was diverted?
     Conrad froths in righteous anger and gets another bus into Oldham Bus Station, where a nice lady confirms the 409 is still running, and shows him a photo of the sink hole.

That sinking feeling ...

     Okay, it's not Meteor Crater, but it's going to have more effect on my life in the coming months.  Yes, months - Conrad predicts Oldham Council will have it repaired for the pre-season rush of Halloween 2017.

I Need Cheering Up - Enter Fox And Leaves!
Do you see what I did there?  "Enter and"  O you do.

The little scamp!

     This is a simple example of fun, being a fox having the time of it's life in a paddling pool full of leaves.  As Freud once said, sometimes a sausage is just a sausage, and in this case a clash of russet fur and foliage is all you need to feel better about the world.

For your information, I am monitored to respond to the name "Robbie" - oh, no, wait, that's "Forbidden Planet", isn't it?  Sorry.  Sometimes it's hard to make sense with the party going on in my head all the time.
     For your information, because I flatter myself that you care, I am getting a lift into work tomorrow, so no bus worries for Thursday.

Conrad - raised by weasels.
RABID weasels

     This is also for your information.  I know I posted it yesterday, but memories around here are short.

     "About 'Stranger Things'?" I hear you query.  "Or was that just click-bait?"
     No!  No, not at all!  Mostly not at all.  A little - okay, yes, except now my mind is frantically working out a creative solution - waitforitwaitforit -

"A Tale Of Two Cities" Versus John Carpenter Stranger Things*
Okay, Conrad loudly and proudly proclaims his like of Charles Dickens.  Modern horror fans look on in puzzlement.  Okay, okay, allow me to explain.
     One of the minor character's minor characters, Young Jerry Cruncher, witnesses his dad - never 'father' - digging up a coffin.
     Not our of hunger or spite, dear reader.  We are talking of the year Seventeen Hundred and Eighty, after all, where "Resurrection Men" plied and supplied the medical profession with fresh cadavers.

Caught with a body in a basket!  Wattle they do!

     Young Jerry is so appalled at that he sees that he runs all the way home, pursued (in his imagination) by the coffin.
     The little wimp!  Look to 'Stranger Things'** again and our pint-sized hero, Mike.  He's got posters for "The Thing" - ha!  got a reference to JC in there! - on his basement walls, for crying out loud.  Has he actually been to see it?  Probably, to be honest, if he could have persuaded his milksop dad to take him along.  What do you think Mike would do if confronted with a coffin?  'Point and laugh', most likely.

Except not at Colonel Pine-Coffin.  Because he'd kill you

     You know the youth - excuse me - The Youth Of Today.  If confronted with the traditional Victorian-era ghost of a shroud with a couple of eyeholes cut out of it, they'd set fire to it.  That, or, if it is insubstantial and ectoplasmic as ghosts tend to be, treat it as a rather inferior hologram.  After all, once you've seen a severed head grow spider legs and snail eyes in order to escape, a bit of textile from Primark simply won't do.

Finally -
Because we've already had a fox and a weasel, allow me to introduce a piece of real schmaltz.

Made up of  pure Awww!

    This clip is so sweet it will put inches on your waistline.  Essentially, a puppy meets a new-born baby and - falls asleep on it***.

And that's it for tonight.  Thank you for listening.  I now have to go and have a word with those mental party animals because I have an early start tomorrow.

*  Bad Conrad!  Naughty Conrad!  Stay on-topic!
** Yesss!  Finally!
*** There, confounded those of you who expected a horrid blood-spattered resolution.  Conrad, raised by rabid weasels, yes, but sensitive rabid weasels.