Sicken Chicken And Slimy Ham

Yes, Conrad Is Daring Sell-By-Dates
Again!  Yes, I found some date-expired ham in the fridge and ate a slice yesterday.  Since there were no consequences, I've been eating the rest of it today.  Nor is that all, there's a packet of date-expired cheapo chicken roll that needs using up.  Art?

12th November is practically in-date

     You can't quite see the sheen of reflected glop on the ham at this angle and lighting, but, trust me, it's there.  Of course Jenny and Edna were both hanging around my ankles, desperately pleading that, as Best Friends Forever, they deserved a slice or two?
     

NO!

     If Conrad had weakened and allowed either or both to go gorging on murderous meat, and there had been problems with either end of our little champions, guess who'd get into trouble?  Conrad, that's who.  So, like the greedy coward he is, he ate it all himself.
     Now, from my stomach to Cold War strategic bombers.  Do keep up!

The Vickers Valiant
I have mentioned the British H-bomb research programme that ended with Operation Grapple.  The tests were rushed because a ban on atmospheric testing of nuclear weapons was due, which had been given a sense of urgency by the South Canadian's "Castle Bravo" shot, which Conrad has decided to call a "frazzle", but which we won't go into here.
     The planes used to drop the test devices for Op Grapple were the Vickers Valiant, one of the British "V" bomber force.  Art?

Valiantics

     This loveable beast looks like a cross between the Avro Vulcan and the Victor.  I'd not heard of it's use anywhere else, and it's role was assumed by the Vulcan in later years, so it's good to know that we the taxpayer did get some use out of them.
     Incidentally, Conrad believes that the strategic RAF bombers were given names that began with "V" because if they got the SCRAMBLE signal, they would render the Sinisters Very Very dead indeed.  Sorry, Sinisters!

Vulcan XM558

     There's a Vulcan for comparison. Art, find me a Victor.

<Imagines the 'Thunderbirds' theme playing>

     This jet was relegated to being a flying petrol-tank but your humble scribe loves the way it looks, just as if it stepped from a Gerry Anderson episode.
     Okay, enough Cold War apocalyptic foreboding, let us have something light and fluffy.

"The Archers"
Here your humble scribe refers to the radio programme, not to the bowmen of Agincourt, because that would embarrass any French readers.
     Being self-referential again, because at least I know what I'm talking about, I refer you back to yesterday's posts and how North Korea cannot possibly allow it's citizens to listen to the BBC World Service.  Conrad jested that hearing "The Archers" would overthrow The  Sulky Fat Lad's regime as the starving Nork masses realised what decadent luxury the West lived in.  Something along those lines.

North Korean "Activists for Airwave Access to Ambridge" protesting

     I then realised that, since our audience here is international, some of you may be baffled by my reference.  Okay, time for an explanation.
     Conrad himself never chose to listen to the programme, but all during his childhood the omnibus edition of Sunday afternoon would get played, as Mother doted on it.  The Sunday Times, a big roast dinner and The Archers - every Sunday.

Art!  No!  Think of the French -

     It is a radio soap opera, the longest-running in the world as it began in 1950.  It's set in the fictional town of Ambridge, in the fictional county of Borchester, and features the everyday lives of a series of families.  "A contemporary drama in a rural setting" is the tagline for the series.  The theme tune is available here -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKVGFP93bPg

     "Barwick Green" being the name.  
     Listening to The Archers isn't actually a requirement of being British, but it comes pretty close.  Conrad remembers reading the autobiography of a hard-bitten SAS veteran, who mentioned that, every time a group of squaddies got together en masse, you'd always hear a radio playing The Archers theme.

The Archers - conquering the airwaves for King, Queen and country for 66 years

Way Out Of Left Field Here
Conrad tends to read two tropes today - military history and murder mysteries, but he does make occasional forays into other fields, mostly science fiction.  One of his favourite authors is Philip K. Dick, as anyone with a long memory may recall, as I've been reading his stuff since being a teenager - which is a very long time ago.
     Anyway, enough of people with a surname derived from German.  Let us move to Roger Zelazny, whose surname is derived from Polish.
     "Roger Who?" I hear you question.  Yes, he doesn't have the public recognition of PKD because none of his works have been made into films.  A couple of television programmes, yes, and that's it.  Art?

Look!  Look!  The Game of Thrones guy endorses Rog!

     Conrad regularly re-reads RZ's "Lord Of Light", which is a complicated retelling of Indian mythology filtered via the far future, and it will never get filmed as the potential for offending India is far too high.  
     Oh, no, wait a minute, I goofed!  "Damnation Alley" got made into a film.  Not a very good film, and RZ hated the bones out of it, and it wasn't very successful - something about competition with a film called "War Stars" - but it was a film.

Ah yes the Landmaster

     I think I shall have to revisit this topic!

This puts us at 917 words.  Should I go for the tonne?  What do you think, audience?

The lady approves

     Thanks for the vote of confidence, Anna.  All I have to do now is come up with a compelling yet pithy concept that can be explored in less than one hundred words.  What should I canvass?  Songs in the oeuvre of Thomas Pynchon? The spigot mortar?  Why the wheel-lock pistol worried the crowned heads of Europe?  The real consequences of being deemed a heretic?  How I cracked the way to predict the Lottery - oh and we've hit the 1,000 mark.

See you tomorrow!