The Fame Of Flames And Portuguese Names

Lo! For Today We Are Going To Start With -

 - 'A Little Musical Critique'.  For those of you with nil memory, this is where BOOJUM! takes a ridiculously strict and strait view of song lyrics, being utterly literal wherever possible.  Since it amuses me, is why.  We have, of late, gone through three songs from 'The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway' including the liner notes, which hint that Peter Gabriel was off his box on 24-can packs of Special Brew whilst writing the lyrics.  Art!

127 empty cans just out of shot

     ANYWAY today we need to look up the origin of an avian name that features in a pop hit from the Sixties:  Flamingo.  The name is derived from the Portuguese 'Flamengo', ultimately derived from the Latin 'Flamma' meaning 'Flame'.  So now you know.  Art!

     NO!  We're talking about red flames here.  Where's that Tazer?

     ANYWAY Manfred Mann had a big hit in the Sixties with 'Pretty Flamingo', hitting the Number 1 spot here in This Sceptred Isle, which is pretty good going for a South African singing about Portuguese birds.  Rather to people's surprise, Manfred was the retiring keyboard player, not the lead singer.  Art!

Manny to port

     Let's begin the critique.

On our block all of the guys call her flamingo

'Block', hmmm?  Suspiciously South Canadian.  Which is where one finds flamingoes, so fair enough, although they should have CAPITALISED and used "quotes".

Cause her hair glows like the sun

Thus instantly melting any hats she wears

And her eyes can light the skies

Searchlights for eyes?  How does she cope in a darkened cinema?

"Usher!"

When she walks she moves so fine like a flamingo

I was not aware that flamingoes are noted for moving anything like 'fine'

Crimson dress that clings so tight

That seems more like it, more appealing than a flamingo strutting about

Calm yourself, men

She's out of reach and out of sight

How can you slobber over her scarlet dress if she's invisible?  HOW!

When she walks by she brightens up the neighborhood

It's those searchlight eyes, I'm telling you.  Plus the burning hat.

CAUTION! This woman sets off fire alarms

Oh every guy would make her his if he just could

The post-modern feminists are going to tackle you about 'agency' here

If she just would

Ah, NOW the agency!  

(Sounds of Tazer being applied)

Some sweet day I'll make her mine pretty flamingo

O my the male ego at work

Then every guy will envy me

What if she has a horrid personality and an evil mother?

Cause paradise is where I'll be

It's a well-scripted series with a new revelation in each episode, good soundtrack and it's not scared about getting rid of characters wh - O!  O, sorry.  My mistake.

Pretty miserable-looking for dwellers in Paradise.  Probably due to lack of flamingoes

Pretty flamingo

Pretty flamingo

Is she pretty?  Making a rough guess here as this is your third mention

When she walks by she brightens up the neighborhood

Quick!  Tell her to stand still and do without streetlamps

Oh every guy would make her his if he just could

Absolutely, no need for interior lighting, it would cut energy bills significantly

If she just would

Some sweet day I'll make her mine pretty flamingo

Then every guy will envy me

Cause paradise is where I'll be

Sha la la la la la la pretty flamingo

Okay, I know it's rude to count but that's five times now.

Some day I'll make her mine

The day is no longer sweet.  I called it, she's a horrible person with a shrewish mother and brutish dad, and a gold-digger to boot

Erm - just who is wearing the crimson dress here?

Yes, I will

Yes, I will

You, sir, are a glutton for punishment

Sha la la la la la la

Yes, off to La-La Land for you.  Begone!

     There is, of course - obviously! - another Flamingo that we have been hearing of since late 2025, and it's nothing to do with pop songs, although there is a certain element of bang about it.  Art!

     A touching shade of feminine pink, I'm sure you'll agree.  We are told not to ask a lady's weight but in this case it's 6,000 kilograms, and she certainly lights up the neighbourhood, especially when making an appearance at night.  Thanks to updates to onboard guidance, Flamingo is less prone to 'could' arrive and a whole lot more likely to 'would' arrive.  She has being going down a bomb in Mordorvia.

     Okay, after breaking the Good Taste Barrier, we shall now move on.

More Of Those Books Redolent Of 'Greybeard'

This is one I have also read, and remember it being a bit of a variation on the Global Nuclear Apocalypse.  Art!

     It's set on a trimaran that sets sail to avoid the nuclear immolation of South Canada, which I remember from a good forty years ago, yay my memory.  This was back in the days when the Sinister Union was perceived as a global threat, rather than a clay-footed colossus operating on borrowed time.  I can remember the travails of the crew along their adventure, yet not how it ends, booh memory you sucker.  From the blurbs on Goodreads I don't think it was very hopeful.  O well.

One I May Have Read Earlier

Still on the theme of literature, here is another entry in the list of '20 Essential classics that continue to inspire readers'.  Art!

     Shakespeare inspires only loathing in Conrad.  If academics ever dug up his shopping list they would rain praise about it's themes and metre and imagery, the pikers.  I've seen an old Sinister film of it and SPOILER ALERT both of them die at the end.  There you go, saved you an hour or so of your life that you would never have gotten back.  Art!

     On the other hand, as mentioned a couple of days ago, here's one I haven't yet read but intend to, a work that has been described as the first modern novel.  Were I to introduce it as 'The delusional Don' you might misinterpret exactly whom I was talking about, especially since the Don attempts to tackle windmills.  You know, mills using wind-power.

Back To Brucie

 - and his portfolio from the 'Sci-Fi Art' Youtube channel.  His style is very distinctive, definitely set apart from the Chris Foss/Angus Mackie school of hyper-detailed technical art.  Art!

Pennington on the plains

     This one's very evocative, with a ruined, neglected highway leading to stark, forbidding and barren hills in the background, lorded over by a Fifties-style flying saucer.  Note the large 'Title Gap' at top, which is kind of wasted as there is no follow-up showing the book in question.  Permit me to dig a little - 

     There you go, 'New Maps Of Hell' by Kingsley Amis.  No, it's nothing to do with either cartography or Hades, rather it's a quite famous look at the sci-fi genre from a Proper Author.  Instead of focussing on ray-guns or rockets, Amis looked at how (good) sci-fi satirises or critiques society by creating believable future dystopias.  Such as Norilsk.

We've Covered This Already

BUT I need a short article to hit the Word Count, so I shall continue.  Art!

     As the US president insults a journalist again, the BBC looks at the questions he does not like to answer.

     Hard questions, questions that refer back to his own negative actions, and above all, questions from women.  The Delusional Don - hmmmm sounds vaguely familiar - will resort to insults, instead of answering the question, and because the South Canadian journos are all sheep, nobody tells him to answer the question or asks it again.  Art!

    

Finally -

Finishing off with a Biercism again  -

"Imagination, n: A warehouse of facts, with a liar and poet in joint ownership."

     Ooo-err Matron, Conrad is in trouble!