More Of Money

I Could Have Put 'Schadenfreude'

But we've had that as a title already.  Not that I don't enjoy revisiting topics, as we are going to continue with the sorry saga of FTX.  You know, the crypto bank who helped me create the word 'Scamble' in reference to their business model.  Art!

     The last of the Big Four at FTX to remain at liberty, Nishad Singh, has been arrested and pled guilty to being a white-collar crook who burned through billions of investor's money.  The other three are Caroline Ellison, Gary Wang and SBF himself.

     Interestingly, Sam Bankman Fried has pled not guilty, the only one of the four trying to maintain his innocence.  Try harder, matey.  A new charge has now been laid at the feet of these rascals: illegal political donations.  Oooh!  The South Canadians take campaign funds very seriously and there are a raft of laws and statutes about what is or isn't legal.  Art!

Because laws are fearfully dull visually

     'Twould appear that these Big Four made a total of 43 payments to Political Action Committees of varying stripes, some being Wizard Lizard Gizzard ones, others belonging to the Ice Cream bandits.  To the tune of $9 million.  Alameda Research, one of the incredibly complex and intentionally opaque business entities within FTX, would forward the money on to the Big Four, who would then make a donation.

     So what? I hear you quibble.  No big deal?  Sorry, very big deal.  Stupid Blubbering Fool is now looking at a total of 155 years in prison; his compatriots in crime might get away with only 15 to 25 after doing a deal.

     Crypto-currency - the money-launderers friend!

     Meanwhile, back Inside Russia ...

     Conrad occasionally watches Konstantin, whom we've mentioned before, on his channel 'Inside Russia', which is now recorded from outside Ruffia; he got out in September.  Art!

     He looks like a stereotypical Ruffian: built like a brick outhouse.  However, he is quietly spoken and thoughtful.  It turns out he's an economist by trade, and he took a detailed look at the Ruffian economy in his latest vlog, because whilst Putin may spout vacuous nonsense about Ruffian finances, 'numbers cannot lie'.  He picked out six major indicators that show Putin is lying, the ruble is rubble and things are only going to get worse.  I made detailed notes, so you're going to get all six, believe me.

1)  Loan defaults.  These figures were for all kinds of loans, including mortgages, and had increased by 30,400 in January.  One explanation might be an increase in unemployment, which hasn't happened; Konstantin explained that the alternative is that people simply cannot afford to repay, indicating increasing hardship.  Art!

2) Foreign currency reserves on deposit in Ruffian banks now stand at $53 billion, which might sound impressive at first glance, until you realize, as K. explained, that this is the lowest total in 15 years.  This is because people holding foreign currency are moving it out of Ruffia.  Art!

"These currencies, once common, are becoming a rare sight in Ruffia."

3)  The Bank of Russia is deliberately hiding data.  Normally they publish details of capital inflow and outflow in January.  Here we are in March and - nothing.  FYI, the outflow estimate for 2022 was $250 billion.

4)  Ruffian vodka consumption is up 7.5% from 2022.  K. explained that drinking the hard stuff is a typical Ruffian resort in the case of miserable living conditions.  Art!

5)  Oil and gas revenues for the first two months of 2023 were down 46%.  We've covered this economic disaster story elsewhere on BOOJUM!

6)  This was the kicker.  The Ruffian budget deficit for January and February was ₽2.6 trillion, thanks to revenues being down by 25% yet expenditures being up by 46%.  The projected budget deficit for the WHOLE of 2023 was ₽2.9 trillion.  So they've run up 90% of the annual deficit in TWO MONTHS!  K. calculated that the overall deficit for 2023 could end up being ₽10 trillion - or $142 billion dollars.  Which is 10% of the pre-war Ruffian GDP.  Meaning that it's probably 25% of the current Ruffian GDP.

     ₽ = currency symbol for 'Ruble'.  Art!

     Putin need not fear the West or NATO destroying Ruffia, he's doing a splendid job of it all by himself.  Repeat after me, Dimya: "It's all going according to plan, it's all going according to plan."

"War With Russia" By General Sir Richard Shirreff

Your Humble Scribe has begun to re-read this novel, including the Foreword, which lays out the political, economic and military background prior to the novel proper, showing how Putin saw the world and the West in particular.

     One thing I can't remember from reading a couple of years ago is whether things like corruption and sheer incompetence get a mention.  Conrad suspects not, and that the Ruffian army is depicted in much too flattering a light.  We shall see, because I'm making notes (that dreaded phrase again!).  Art!

"The Sea Of Sand"

We have jumped in perspective back to 'Wasteworld', where the pompous and arrogant aristocrat Lord Excellency Sur is about to get an unpleasant surprise.

‘Whilst you have been – apparently acquiring property – whilst you have been away, we have been enduring trouble with the Farmers, Sur.’

          Sur stopped his theatrical cape-twirling and goggled at Url.  Trouble with the Farmers?  Those lackeys?  They were bred to be meek and submissive fodder and fodder raisers.  What kind of trouble could they make!

          ‘What kind of trouble?’ he asked, gesturing his escort away to find transport for the cuboid trophy.

          ‘Violence.  Killing.  Refusal to provide algae quotas.’

          Sur bent backwards in sincere surprise.  He couldn’t speak for whole seconds.

          ‘All happening in your bailiwick, Sur.  Consequently, you are being held responsible.’

          ‘Me!  This is intrigue plotted by a rival, nothing more!’ he blustered.

          ‘The Farmers have killed Warriors, Sur!’ snapped Url.  ‘Warriors.  This is unheard of!’

          Sur stomped off the platform to the console, genuinely unsettled at the news from Url, if it was in fact news and not some subterfuge.  He shuddered to think of the potential threat to civilisation from rebellious Farmers, who constituted the greater part of Homeworld’s population.  The bodyguards around Url discreetly prevented him from closing the gap, until Url waved them away.

          ‘We need to discuss this threat, Url,’ began Sur.  ‘On the brink of a whole new world to exploit and enslave, this threat cannot be allowed to divert us.  Cannot.  Will not!’

     So, you see, the Doctor's subtle meddling and interference is bearing fruit.

On The Horns Of A Dilemma

Not all Ruffians agree with the Puffy Petrol Pimp; someone recently snuck onto an airbase in Vladivostok and set fire to an SU-27 fighter jet, with impunity.  No security nor fire engine, either.  $20 million up in smoke, literally.

     ANYWAY some malicious wags hacked into a Ruffian television network and put up this message.  Art!

     I bet this caused a need to launder underwear in viewers, thanks to all the blustering from Ruffian media presenters frothing at the mouth about nuking Berlin and London and New York.

     The question then becomes, how do you know if it's real or not the next time it comes up?  One to ponder.

Finally - 

Hmmmmm today's afternoon blog is not made up of fluffy bunnies and rainbows, is it?  Okay, I shall try to lighten the mood with the evening one.  Art!